Latest Posts by coolpaperoafparty - Page 3

I just wanna see your bedroom pweaseee mister wonka 😔😢

I normally wouldn't allow my privacy to be intruded on, but since you said please and my room is in order today, I will this once.

Before you ask, the walls are not made of chocolate, they are designed to LOOK like chocolate. Otherwise it would melt and collapse and that would be terrible to wake up to. Haha!

I feel like you a freak on the low even if you a virgin

Since you like chocolate so much how do you feel about dating a black woman? We got all the chocolate you need babyboy 😏😏😏😏

Oh my goodness. Are you trying to seduce me by using my love for chocolate against me?

How wicked. I do like rich flavors. You might be in luck, if you are in fact a woman.

Or did you mean chocolate as in skin color? Because in the case of dating I would hope that your personality is just as rich and your love is just as sweet.

Would you like to be friends? 😁😄😃

Ha ha...no.

Because you see, most people aren't going to put the same amount of effort in that I do...and that is the biggest form of rejection to me. The worst kind, actually. Friends let you down, or people you trust betray you and steal your secret chocolate recipes, why should I want them? Besides, The Buckets, Hatter and Edward are my dearest friends. I have no more tolerance for others. Maybe you should ask Edward, he told me that it gets lonely up in that stuffy castle sometimes, and unfortunately I can't visit often. He lives quite the distance and my factory is demanding.

New favorite song!

Can you please post the Willy Wonka song you used in the "when your candy sells" meme you made Mr Wonka? Please 😊😊😊

Ah, here it is. Excuse the language.

Benji Ceez & Rich The Kid - Willy Wonka

At least it ain't mike

Would you like to be friends? 😁😄😃

Ha ha...no.

Because you see, most people aren't going to put the same amount of effort in that I do...and that is the biggest form of rejection to me. The worst kind, actually. Friends let you down, or people you trust betray you and steal your secret chocolate recipes, why should I want them? Besides, The Buckets, Hatter and Edward are my dearest friends. I have no more tolerance for others. Maybe you should ask Edward, he told me that it gets lonely up in that stuffy castle sometimes, and unfortunately I can't visit often. He lives quite the distance and my factory is demanding.

Cocoa here!

So... Have you ever been outside while it was raining and just stood in the rain?

Ah...no. Rain makes you sticky and sick, why would you stand in it intentionally?

We might need to discuss a few of your life choices, Cocoa Bean.

What's going down in the factory today? Here we are! The fermentation process of cocoa beans. Besides just being a pretty good looking piece of chocolate there is a lot that has to be done at the factory before we can start making chocolate.

Exhibit A: The process of fermentation.

This harvest is a test sample of the fermentation process. It's being tested to see if fermentation is complete, and it's not yet ready as the seeds are indicating that it needs to be fermented a little longer. This is just one of the many other tasks that are done at the factory that requires the knowledge and experience necessary for producing good chocolate. In other words, you gotta have the beans!

We are so excited for our next batch of Wonka bar releases and can't wait to share them with you all. In the meantime, enjoy our current chocolates and stay tuned for what's to come!

And to the Americans celebrating, happy Memorial Day!

- Willy Wonka 🍫

Hi Mr. Wonka. If I in any way made you or your oompa loompas uncomfortable at the last barbeque, I sincerely apologize. I did not think I would get drunk ~

That's just the problem, Alice. You don't think. You spilled heavens knows what on my new tailored coat, vomited on poor Edward, kicked an Oompa Loompa while trying to, as you said, "tear up the dance floor", and tripped and fell into the dessert table. You made a fool of yourself and ruined the party for everyone at the same time. Next time please be more considerate of your guests before popping out a big bottle of the some ol' trippy chug-a-lug.

Oh, I almost forgot. You're banned from the factory as well, by the way. I can't have you endangering my Oompa Loompas or destroying everything, now can I? And I will be billing you my Oompa Loompa's hospital bill. Yeah. Use this as a lesson to be more responsible. Hmph.

I'm late but hey daddy bear 🐻🐨

Good morning, my little chocolate chips! Ride and shine! Up and at 'em! Take that sip of hot Joe and let's all have a productive day today, yes?

I'm cold. That's it. That's what I've been feeling all day.

Aww, maybe you should drink a cup of hot chocolate. That always warms me up!

I wanna taste your lips 😘 I know you're sweet like sugarcane 💕💗

Silly girl, if you would like to taste me then you could simply just eat me, I am eatable after all. Though I'm afraid that isn't a bright idea, unless you'd like to speak with the local authorities.

No insult to your hair, and your hair is great (it looks so silky...)

I'm just weird and sometimes get thoughts like that when I look at people.

For some reason I think that Charlie Bucket likes spiders and snails and all that stuff. Or at least tolerates them.

Hm, you're a very strange little cocoa bean...

Ugh, no! Absolutely not. I wouldn't ever allow Charlie to bring those furry little creepy crawlers into the factory. I'd have my Oompa Loompas exterminate them at once! Bugs and insects are not to be around my precious chocolate, or anything else for that matter. That's just disgusting.

Why's that?

You can call me anything you want to, by the way. I don't really label myself regarding pronouns and stuff.

Even if you referred to me as "it" like I was some piece of furniture.

Oh, I could never refer to a human as an "it". That would feel very disrespectful. Unless, of course, they're not human. However, pronouns and gender identities nowadays can be very confusing for me, there are many and I grew up in a much simpler time.

So in that case, I'll just stick to simplifying the conundrum by referring to you as anonymous, if that's alright with you of course. ☺️

Dear, tumblrs. If you have asked a question or commented on something of mine and I haven't responded, I am terribly sorry. My asks are backed up and I get at least 20-45 notifications at a time, some of which I hadn't noticed until this morning while eating my breakfast. It's a really fast pace to maintain between answering questions and running the factory.

Heh....so sorry.

I wanna touch you in ways that are too inappropriate to say 🙂🙂🙂🙂🙂🙂

I see...

And I'd prefer it if you kept your dirty fantasies and your sticky little fingers to yourself, 'kay?

Sure, I don't really care for names either.

I don't do much. I'm just there, I talk a lot of weird stuff, and I like cats.

Nevermind anonymous then, I'll stick with calling you Cocoa Bean. Yes, I like that much better. It's got a chocolate-y ring to it.

That nickname makes my soul melt somehow.

So, I'm just gonna stick around then, ask you weird questions, leave to get some ice cream from time to time, and give you my unshared platonical love and adoration!

Terrific then! Do stick and around and pick my brain from time to time, I'm sure I'd enjoy it, or at the least, be thoroughly amused. I hope that ice cream you're occasionally buying is non-melting and Wonka brand, by the way. For the sake of my own pleasure I'll just assume it is! ☺️

Aawww

You can't just give one of your followers a cute nickname and not the rest of us that's not fair 😔

But I called you all chocolate chips earlier, is that suddenly not good enough?

Wait a minute......

Goodnight world.

Don't worry if Augustus asks you about the Christkind again. You'll find all you need to know about her at this site: https://germangirlinamerica.com/what-is-the-christkind/

Oooh, how marvelous! So it's kind of like Santa Clause! A gift-bringer. I think Santa might have some heavy competition in Europe.

Speaking of which, I may have to travel to Germany during the Christmas season to see if I can find this Christkind.

Knuck if you buck 😂😂😂 sorry

I need to have a word with you and Edward privately please. 😁 IMMEDIATELY 😠

Oh...

Yeah sure, one moment, Tarrant.

Ok then here you go:

It's the cover of take me home, country roads by Kira Lise. She put that whole thing in a minor key. It's so sad but so beautiful and makes me longing for something I can't explain

Even though you were right about it not being my cup of tea, it is a very beautiful song.

I listened to this cover and then the original. I kind of prefer this version. It's more somber, puts you in a headspace that the original doesn't, in my opinion.

I don't know why you listened to that asker's music link you don't know anything about music!

Oh, Mumbler. You got jokes, hm? So ever-loving help me, if you test me one more time I'll dunk you in a chocolate barrel! And. Hold. You. Under until chocolate is squirting out of every little hole on your body! And I'm not kidding. Hahaha...ah...

Now, where was I? Ah, yes. Answering questions.

Moving right along!

Don't worry if Augustus asks you about the Christkind again. You'll find all you need to know about her at this site: https://germangirlinamerica.com/what-is-the-christkind/

Oooh, how marvelous! So it's kind of like Santa Clause! A gift-bringer. I think Santa might have some heavy competition in Europe.

Speaking of which, I may have to travel to Germany during the Christmas season to see if I can find this Christkind.

Wait you can rap? I wanna see

Can you sing? What are your talents?

Oh, goodness no. Ha. I'm not the best singer. I'm not bad. Just not Michael Jackson good. More like average.

Although, I do have quite a few talents, which include flute playing, dancing, reading backwards, rapping, voice imitation, acrylic painting, magic, cooking, and of course, candy making. :)

If you could travel anywhere in Europe, where would you travel to?

Hm, I would visit Venice, Italy. I think Italian happens to be one of the most beautifully spoken languages and I've always dreamed of living there when I was a little boy. Not to mention the beautiful architecture, it's all very breathtaking. I'd love to just watch the people travel by boat to their destinations. I wonder how they manage it all?

When Mike ran across your television room and knocked your oompa loompas over you should've took your cane across his forehead and knocked his ass out. Deadass

As hilarious as that sounds I think mumbler learned a bigger lesson after hopping into the machine, a probably permanent one he won't forget.

Nooooo I love the oompas 😭

Heh...emergency calls. Be back later!

But grandpa joe said he worked for you 20 yrs ago

Yes, and 20 years ago I would've been 22, when he was working at my store on Cherry Street.

You're so hot Willy

Day 37464738383 of me asking your age 😂😂😂

You don't give up so easily, do you? I'll give.

I'm 42.