Latest Posts by definitely-not-a-clown - Page 3

noticed my coworker was on tumblr so i told them “i like your shoelaces” and they said “never say that out loud to me”

Reblog to put one of these in your mutuals’ pocket when they’re not looking

Hi just thinking about Splinter who went from a dashing internationally loved superstar to a hideous mutant who has to raise four rowdy boys alone in hiding while struggling with latent trauma from his mom abandoning him, cutting himself off from his family, and getting betrayed by the love of his life. Thinking about how him “letting himself go” wasn’t just written for jokes but from a place of unspoken depression. Thinking about how he never shared any of this with his boys and never projected his trauma onto them but his distance led to them being starved for affection. Thinking about how much they ADORE him even when he’s blatantly neglectful, insinuating that he does pay attention when it matters. And don’t get me started on his movies dubbing his accent over or how separated he became from his own culture, leading to parallels to the Asian immigrant experience.  He’s a flawed parent. He’s an okay sensei. He’s a loving father. He’s a badass family man. ROTTMNT really looked at the boring one dimensional mentor with culturally insensitive stereotypes in past iterations and went nah we can do better. 

And then they made us all cry. 

OpenAI beta troll greentexts

I’m telling you, someone really needs to make sure the Queen has a wreath of garlic and a gold crucifix for the duration of the wake because, in case you forgot, she’s related to Vlad Dracula the Impaler.

I feel the obligation to show Tumblr how this Argentinian entertainer announces the Queen’s death and cracks open the bubbly live on air

i have never seen a post with you as the op that wasn't the stupidest shit i ever read

jack sparrow voice: but you have seen posts with me as the op

when john enters the game he’s a weenie who almost dies fighting an imp wielding a stuffed bunny even though he had a hammer. when rose enters the game she’s like okay it’s time for me to wade through an ocean of corpses i’ve got two knitting needles and i’m going to be unto these monsters a new doom marine

Everyone shut up and look at Lala.

When you go to Utah you have a 50/50 split chance of meeting either a mormon or a murderous furry

Heya just a heads up for anyone using discord, as of July 2nd 2022 this has been a quickly spreading hack that utilizes members of your friends list to spread the hack further. Please do not click this link if you receive it, and unfortunately your friend was hacked if they send this to you.

something i love abt the new baymax show is that baymax says a person's cry verbatim when alerted to a medical issue, so like.

"hello! i am baymax, your personal healthcare companion. i was alerted to the need for medical attention when you said, 'fuck! fucking ow. oh my fucking god, my fucking elbow. ow. fucking ow.'"

help this is so much

ppl who celebrate fictional character birthdays are annoying pass it on

Do not use Discord to seek an abortion. Discord willingly hands out user data to the cops.

Use Signal to communicate for seeking an abortion, they use double ended encryption

artist animates over real life with sharpies, whiteout, & cels

KILL HIM

stan and ford did this

Reblog if you’ve ever been personally victimized by Pikachu man.

mad respect to the quarry for giving us gratuitous female nudity for like 2 scenes before putting emma in sweats but keeping jacob tits & dick out for the entire game lmao

ao3 crashed and the people are suffering

The more intelligent you are the more serious it sounds when someone says you "had an accident"

dog = pissed on the floor

toddler = spilled some milk

professor = permanently disfigured by vapors