Remus: *closes A Cabinet* 

James: Mom can you stop picking me up from Hogwarts?

Effie, tearing up, thinking he’s embarrassed: Oh, okay.

James: Wait no it’s not like that!

James: It’s just… Marlene says things that make me very uncomfortable when she sees you.

Peter: Why is there cheese on my bed AGAIN?!

Mary: I swear, it was Marlene this time

Marlene: You didn’t have to rat me out

Peter: Marlene…

Mary: Don’t worry, we’ll make sure it gets squeaky clean.

Lily: We’ll make sure you can’t tail there ever was cheese.

Peter:

Peter: Why did we tell them?

James: At least they don’t keep SHINING LIGHTS into your EYES!

Lily: Hey, what’s up? 

Dorcas: The sky. 

Lily: No, I meant like, what are you doing? 

Dorcas: Oh. Marlene. 

Marlene: *highfiving Dorcas* Nice!

Harry: School sucks. I keep almost dying.

Remus: I know, but you have to do it so you can get a job. 

Harry: What are jobs like? 

Remus: They suck.

Harry: But how often do you almost die?

marauders fandom missed the opportunity to call marylily lary

Andromeda : What's the worst thing you guys have done? 

Narcissa: I stole a pear once.

Sirius: I hexed Regulus

Regulus: So I pushed him down the stairs.

Bellatrix: I’ve set fire to a couple towns, I guess.

Narcissa: Cool, cool. Andromeda?

Andromeda: 

Andromeda: I don’t break KitKats.

Sirius: EVIL!

CHARLI LIKES BOYS BUT SHE KNOWS I'D HIT IHT

Head boy James having to punish kids for going to the party that he definitely did not plan

Cop: You ran a red light. 

Sirius: So did you, hypocrite. 

Cop: I was following you. 

Sirius: That was dumb, I'm a terrible driver. 

Cop: Get out.

*Cut to Remus in the passenger seat questioning his life decisions*

Lily Evans is for hot and sexy people. If you don't like Lily, well, I have some news for you.