New Missed Childhood Memory Unlocked

Feeling like killing myself later tonight. The dysphoria and it's consequences are too much. Don't bother telling me to please not do it, or tell me it will get better. because 1. Nobody truly cared before and 2. no it will not, I'm certain of that right now.

And I know nobody cares for me, not on a personal level, and not a broader scale. So I'm finally ready to do "it" I suppose. Hopefully it will be more peaceful there.

forever torn on "I need God" and my sheer inability to believe in a literal, physical God.

And even for trans men who are fully bodily abled, white, and have little to no mental illness and/or aren't neurodivergent... Did people forget that we aren't 100% the same as cis men, in the places where trans men would get placed in men's prisons? Because while remaining family friendly, if you haven't had bottom surgery there'd be some very peculiar issues regarding that in a prison environment.

And regardless of which gender prison you're placed in, hrt access isn't always guaranteed in prison, far from it in fact.

And the whole transphobia aspect aside from placing trans men in women's prisons; women's prisons can get pretty violent too, and especially towards trans men since they're "different" which is often reason enough to incite violence. That and women's prison often being even more neglected than men's prisons.

Cut some slack on trans men who won't just "do DIY" and stop hating on those who do + transmasc diy hrt should be less taboo. I know this wasn't even about diy hrt but just had to throw that in there.

I think it’s normal to be afraid of jail especially for trans men who are disabled or not white or are mentally ill. to casually joke about “what happened to be gay do crimes” to a population whose mortality is threatened by the prospect of jail is deeply cruel and deranged behavior.

queers use to throw bricks at cops and now all y'all do is cry about trans mascs / men existing in a way you dont like what the fuck happened. can we bring the bricks back please

Mood for when some childhood staple games(that you once legitimately paid for) don't want to run anymore, and either the company doesn't feel like fixing it because it's not profitable, *or* arguably worse, they broke it on purpose so that you'll play their new games, which are more expensive, require more expensive tech to run, and sometimes even include microtransactions in a paid game??

So I was supposed to put up with someone constantly joking about my sexual assault and abusive family because "they have BPD, they can't help it! :((( " but I dare say anything, to anyone, that's considered mean in the slightest and it's all "you shouldn't bully others!" "always be the bigger person" and "you should be a good example" but then also told that people with mental health disorders can't/don't have to change, which of course applies to everybody but me, because I simply have to learn to "accept life" and "sometimes you gotta go off your own path a little". No. Fuck off. If people can say anything and whatever because their mental illness makes them do so, so I can I. Oh and also people still holy believe that male and female socialization is something that got invented in the past 20 years with the sole purpose of misgendering trans women. Please get outta here.

kinda tired fighting for a life i don’t even want

Would reblog a thousand times if I could

I feel like people forget most trans guys still had to grow up as girls.

We were still forced to be mature early

We were still told to not to take up space

We were still subject to female beauty standards

Our bodies were still treated as inappropriate

We were still pitted against each other

We were still excluded from “male” activities

We were still treated as lesser the boys

Those things don’t evaporate once we transition they’re fucking internalized. I constantly have to remind myself I’m allowed to exist. We don’t stop dealing with misogyny.

Dear capitalism,

buying anything besides groceries makes me physically sick

beat that

Dear diary...

All of this feels so pointless...

I feel like I'm wasting my time here.

There's no point in me being here if all I ever do is suffer...