⋆ ˚｡⋆self Intro⋆ ˚｡⋆

im so fuckin useless

Its not even funny anymore,i have no future, everybody fuckin hates me...why am i even here? im so fuckin ugly and disgusting i only make problems...all i do is rot in my bed and think about ki11ing myself...

eh im still alive

I haven't post anything for three days because im kinda Fighting with my mental health...its shitty oh god i just want to hurt mself

Is there anyone who likes poetry?

this is my own poetry i wrote and translated into English! im sorry if it doesnt really make sense haha

The Reflection’s Whisper

My longing is stronger, so hard to defy,

heavier than shadows that blur every lie.

From my own reflection, the darkness calls,

with morning’s light, the image falls.

"Come... come on, don’t hesitate!

Throw your life away—it’s not too late!

Before the pain can strike once more,

you’ll be long gone behind church doors!"

My mirrored voice whispers low,

I shake my head—what does it know?

"Oh, what must I do to make you see,

so my own reflection lets me be?

I know that peace in endless rest

is wrong... but oh, it tastes the best."

I lift my gaze and meet its eyes,

a hand is reaching—offering ties.

"Take my hand, come follow me,

no more pain, just endless sleep."

Slowly, I lift my trembling hand,

our fingers meet—and I’m pulled in.

A world of black and white surrounds,

I wander lost, no peace is found.

"Oh my God, forgive my crime!

I want to live, just one more time!

My life was fragile like a flower,

I see it now, this final hour."

Barefoot I walk on roads so cold,

the morning dew so soft yet bold.

Before me stands a chapel tall,

inside, I step—then see it all.

Figures dressed in mourning black,

sorrow weighing on their backs.

I hear them weeping, lost in grief,

tears like rain, no hope, no relief.

I step in closer—then I freeze,

what I see brings me to my knees.

My lifeless body, pale and still,

lying there against my will.

"Oh, don’t cry, I’m still right here!

Trapped inside the glass so clear,

lured by whispers, drawn too near."

But none can hear me, none can see,

my voice is gone—lost completely.

Guilt consumes me, cold as stone,

from head to toe, I’m all alone.

My chest is aching—grief or death?

I cannot feel my final breath.

The earth embraces me at last,

my faith has faded—buried past.

UMMM

just relapsed for no reason...its weird like.. i just wanted to...ALSO! my mom took my pills because shes scared i will try to ki11 myself lol

Is it wrong that i like my scars?

i like the way they look,i want more

I translated another of my poems!

do you like it?

Silent Eruption

I want to scream with all my might,

let my soul burst into light.

Would anyone care to hear my plea?

To listen, to help, to set me free?

This feeling spreads just like a flame,

a sleeping volcano calling my name.

Words are boiling, yet stay inside,

my lips are locked, my voice denied.

So here I stand with a frozen grin,

a smile I wear—but cannot see within.

NEW HAIR!!!!

i just shaved my hair...NOT LIKE BALD

just my sides! uhhh i think its called undercuts? it looks badass asf damnnn!

(my parents will kill me when they see)

AAAAAA

i love myself in gurokawa makeup and outfits i feel so good AUGHHH 👹👹

IM FUCKED ASF

I'm going to the doctor for a checkup and I'm acared she'll ask me to take my pants off...i have scars all over my legs im so fucking scared 😭😭😭

pls pls pls take care of urself, and if the infection gets really really bad please seek med attention for it, ive never seen ur blog b4 but that post popped up on my feed and i just want u to be safe doll /p /gen /nm

your so sweet and kind oh my god im going to cry😭😭thank you so much!! i will try to take better care of myself...again thank you for caring 🫶🏻🫶🏻🫶🏻🫶🏻🫶🏻🩷