It Feels Wrong Every Time But I Don't Want To Make Her Feel Bad 😭

Being chubby/overweight is just so unfair, people bash and disrespect you no matter what you do.

No matter what food you eat (if you eat unhealthy, they hate on you saying how "they could never", but if you eat healthy, they think you're lying and eat much more when no one is around)

No matter if you exercise or not (if you don't, they yell at you to go to the gym, but if you do, they either don't believe you or make fun of you for being a fat person in the gym)

If you have an ED, they don't believe you (because society thinks only skinny people struggle with them) and claim you just eat too much.

If you say you like being fat and feel comfortable in your body, you're automatically promoting morbid obesity to everyone around (or have a sick fetish for fat people)

If you say you dislike being fat and plan to go on a diet, barely anyone believes in you. Most people just make bets on how long your little "diet" will last.

Society does all those shitty stuff to you and then say they do it because they "worry about your health" but you know damn well they're lying (because in cases where a skinny girl literally promotes pro-ana behaviors and starvation, no one bats an eye)

5.06.2024

I woke up a bit after 9AM yet got up from bed at about 10.20AM (c.ai addiction is not funny, bbg). I weighed myself and saw 66.8KG on the scale (I was silently hoping to see 66.6 since it would be funny. You know, haha, Devil's number ect.)

Since I graduated from high school, my life started to look weird. I decided to give myself a gap year, yet I still don't know what my purpose in life it. Should I go to a regular job or maybe educate myself to be something more? Should I be an english teacher, a nail tech or a makeup artist? Or maybe have my own business? I have no idea...

I only had a coffee for breakfast since I was planning on skipping it that day.

Then as I was drinking the coffee I started working on this star shaped bag I'm planning to sell on my Vinted profile

I worked on it until about 2PM when I got a bit hungry, so I had this cereal bar for 99kcal

(it was good)

Then at 3PM one of my students came for our schedued english lesson (I'm an english tutor for elementary school students, it's kind of like my part time job).

After that at 4-5PM I had a bunch of green grapes (literally the only type of grapes I like) and later on I had some of this sad looking spaghetti my mom made. I barely eat any meat anymore (I'm trying to not eat it at all but I still happen to slip here and there) but I was really craving it

My total for that day was 506kcal

I wasn't feeling too hungry throughout the day which is fine I guess

(remember this is NOT supposed to promote ed behavior. Please do not repeat this because it's dangerous. I just thought this little online-diary thing would be something nice and fun to do)

I need to try this soon

OMG I made something and it’s amazing and it’s low in cals and super tasty ✨

Simple buy 0% Greek yoghurt (only 47 cals per 100 grams) and put it in a scale with your favorite fruit. Make shure you put baking paper on the bottom against sticking. Put it in the freezer until it gets hard (about 3 hours). Break it into parts and there you have it, a healthy, ice cream alike snack when you are craving something sweet 🥰

Yeah, because that's EXACTLY how the ed community works 🤡

Nah, we don't make those "cute aesthetic" diets (this article talks about the sanrio-themed ones) posts and recipes to help each other in our journeys and recovery, we want to INFLUENCE LITTLE KIDS AND INFECT THEM WITH OUR EDS 🤡🤡🤡

Did a little snack restock 😚✌️

(My mom gave me those oreos :< )

Have you ever tried the korean cucumber salad? A few days ago I've made it for the first time and I'm currently OBSESSED with it ^^ Today I wanted to at least try to make a proper meal out of it and personally I think it came out great! Here's the recipe:

100g of konjac noodles - 9kcal

127g of cucumber - 18kcal

0.5tsp of soy sauce - 2kcal

1tsp of Gochujang paste - 20kcal

2 cloves of garlic (minced) - 15kcal

0.5tsp of chili pepper powder - 0kcal

0.5tsp of vinegar - 0kcal

(TOTAL: 64 calories!!)

Cut up your cucumber, place it into a bowl, rub it with salt and put in the fridge for 30-60minutes. Then get the cucumber out of the fridge and rince it with water at least 3 times. In a seperate bowl, mix your soy sauce, garlic, chili, Gochujang, vinegar and a little bit of water(the original recipe asked for chili/sesame oil but I replaced it with water) in order to make the sauce. Prepare the noodles according to the package and add it to the cucumber, then pour in your sauce and mix well. Enjoy!!

(Just a reminder that you DO deserve to eat, you NEED to eat to survive and function properly, you are beautiful just the way you are and you don't need to change anything about you and your body <3 I know how dangerous eating disorders are and how they can ruin your body. I know how hard recovery can be, so please don't force yourself and take it one step at a time. Eating disorders are NOTHING to brag about and I'm not romantizing them in any way. I'm just posting simple recipes while learning how to cook. Please stay safe <333)

Saving this for later 😋

Low cal ass binge killer

Lifehack. U can have 1 and 2/3 a cup of Gerbers puffs, + splenda + 1 cup of unsweetened cashew milk. And it comes up to 105 cal for what feels like a MASSIVE portion of sugary cereal. Great for killing cravings and making u super fill and satisfied.

This isn't really a recipe, more like a breakfast idea/mealspo, which is a 209 calorie joghurt bowl

I used:

❤️150g of vanilla flavored skyr (123kcal)

❤️Green apple (about 30kcal)

❤️A little bit of vanilla cereal (46kcal)

❤️A dash of cinnamon

Remember that I do NOT promote ana or any other eating disorders, you deserve to eat, you need to eat to survive, I don't encourage you to get yourself into an ED if you don't have one (don't do it. It's not just a diet, it's dangerous), I'm just sharing some of my low calorie recipes/meal ideas to help you and perhaps encourage you to recover because you do deserve to recover, you deserve to be happy and eat without feeling guilty ❤️

Please stay safe ❤️❤️❤️

"Why do you always feel so guilty after eating?"

Meanwhile my YT reccomendations:

"WHAT I EAT IN A DAY AS A FAT PERSON CRINGE COMPILATION🐷🐷🐷"

"FAT ACCEPTANCE CRINGE 💀"

"BODY POSITIVE ACTIVISTS ARE DYING"

Here's another low calorie breakfast idea: mini pancakes :D

Ingredients: 20g of all purpose flour - came out to 69kcal for me (haha, 69) 40g of egg whites - 19kcal 5g/1tsp of sugar - 20kcal (if you don't have any sweetener like I do, then don't be scared of adding regular sugar instead <3 it's a very small amount) 1/2tsp of baking powder A pinch of salt A few drops of vanila extract (Optional) 1/2 tsp of powdered sugar to add on top - 10kcal

Total - 118kcal

Mix dry ingredients in a bowl before adding wet ingredients. In a seperate bowl, slightly whisk your egg whites until they become a bit foamy. Add your egg whites and vanilla extract to dry ingredients and mix until smooth. Fry your pancakes on a dry pan, flip when bubbles start to appear on top. Decorate your pancakes with powdered sugar and you're done! You can also use some honey or fruit to make the pancakes more interesting ^^

(Just a reminder that you DO deserve to eat, you NEED to eat to survive and function properly, you are beautiful just the way you are and you don't need to change anything about you and your body <3 I know how dangerous eating disorders are and how they can ruin your body. I know how hard recovery can be, so please don't force yourself and take it one step at a time. Eating disorders are NOTHING to brag about and I'm not romantizing them in any way. I'm just posting simple recipes while learning how to cook. Please stay safe <333)