Me: Why Am I Here? Demon: BECAUSE YOU CAUSED THIS!!! Me: I DIDN'T WANT YOU TO FUCKING CURSE ME Fey's

Derpy face Tamari

evil(?) tamari

C=

Guy: YOU STUPID BITCH! I FUCKING TUTORED YOU FOR NOTHING?! Me: WELL YOU SUCK AS A TEACHER YA CUNT!

You are “the guy”, when something needs to be done, something needs to be fixed, when governments, billionaires or very important people need something done and someone says “I know a guy”, you are that guy. Now you are facing what may be your hardest job.

"Bitch all I'm trying to do is assaininate someone!!!"

“…If all else fails, claim you’re a time traveler and that you’re trying to stop a disaster or something. It’s not exactly a sure bet, but there’s enough people out there who will let you do anything if they think it’s to save the future. Hell, if you’re convincing enough they’ll help you.”

"No?" ". . . IT'S FIRE MAGIC!! YOU DUMB B-"

The Elf looks down to the lone human mage "You stand trial for warcrimes. Explain how you did it with just fire Magic" he said dismissively. "Well. Have you ever thought how and why fire burns?"

My mom supports Trump (I kinda do too but I'm not 100% into politics) and we're Mexican and when I saw these posts, I laughed. I fucking laughed. Shows how leftists are at times. My mom has a thermos with "leftist tears" written on it. I'm not saying all leftists are bad, there are bad people in the right as well, but this is so fucking fun too see that many more republicans. I live in a leftist city so it's rare for me to see republicans.

Oh dear god Chrome..... I swear for chrismas I'm getting you something so that you don't end up cutting of blood cerculation from your arm with all those bracelets

kandi life

Me: *pushes the lawyer I hired down under my desk* Okay...... well first I would like to have that lawyer paid triple what he usually makes for my first wish.

“I’m going to stop you right there, you dont have to be super specific about your wish, I don’t do monkeys paw or any of that garbage.”

@ask-the-face-man

HAHAHA HOW WOULD LEO REACT TO SEEING A FIGURINE OF DONNIE LIKE THIS 💀

Please, he would pass out from oxygen deprivation-

SLAMS IT EVEN HARDER!!!

Just in case you forget this exists.

It exists.

This is so fucking true.

down with found family. UP with FOUND DIVORCE!!!!!!!!!!!!!