Raven!Neil Au Where Andrew And Neil Meet For The First Time At A Banquet.

911 gif meme: [3/3] Families: The Grant/Nash Family: Athena, Bobby, Michael, David, May & Harry

+ Bonus

я столько лет поздравляла всех ровно в 00:00 со всеми праздниками но почему-то меня никто и никогда за редким исключением

merman Neil finds a lot of people’s jewellery and always gives them his merman Andrew.

Andrew is always resentful but still wears these jewellery because a) it’s Neil’s gift b) Neil gave this c) it’s none of your fucking business

and he puts on himself these countless necklaces and beads, puts on rings and some strange bracelets. and he absolutely everything changes. one day Andrew wears gaudy yellow beads made of artificial shells with rings with black stones. then he will put on emerald choker and beaded rings. However, there’s a bracelet which Andrew will never remove. smooth pebbles hanging on green algae. they are not as smooth as they were then Neil found them but Andrew doesn’t care. It is unique bracelet. Andrew will put it on until his death. and even after he won’t do it.

Stop helping men. Stop going out of your way to share knowledge with them. Ignore them if you can do so safely. If that’s not possible, shrug your shoulders when you can get away with it. Act dumb. I don’t know how long that’s supposed to cook for. I don’t know what cleaner to use in the tub. I don’t know where Melvin filed the papers for that big project. I don’t know where Kevin went. I don’t know how to get stains out of a shirt. I don’t know. I don’t know. I don’t know.

Stop enabling them. Just stop it. Just stop. If they can weaponize incompetence, so can you.

andrew, to neil: stop being so sappy

also andrew, to neil: here are matching armbands <3 also I bought you a phone <3 and even chose you the same song for ringtone <3 i GaVe YoU kEy AnD CalLeD iT hOmE <3 I'd blow you <3 n e i l <3 <3 <3

consider, for just a moment, the first time neil gets drunk with the foxes.

i think it wouldn’t happen until the end of his second year, but when it does, nobody was prepared.

so, neil is partying with his foxes. it’s probably a bonding night or something, just them in a dorm. i doubt he’d let himself get drunk with strangers around, but he trusts the foxes not to hurt him and he trusts andrew not to let him do anything stupid.

shockingly, neil is a massive lightweight. he rarely ever drinks, so in reality it’s not that surprising, but somehow none of the foxes expected him to get completely pissed off of like three beers.

neil, as it turns out, says the most batshit outta pocket things when he’s drunk. i’m talking bringing up his traumatic childhood in casual conversation and then immediately afterwards asking allison to braid his hair or something. just completely random and a little horrifying.

eventually, andrew decides that it’s time for neil to switch to water, but when he tries to hand neil a glass, he just says “oh, fuck off, aaron.”

andrew tries to ask what the fuck neil just called him, but neil tries to punch him before he can.

that’s right, just tries to full on deck andrew.

andrew finds the whole thing hilarious, because 1. even if andrew hadn’t caught neil’s arm, the punch wouldn’t have hurt at all. neil was moving too slowly and he probably would have missed anyway, and 2. because the first (and only) time neil ever mistook the twins, it didn’t end with him trying to kiss aaron, it ended with him trying to punch andrew in the face. neil’s gut reaction to seeing aaron is just punching him in the fucking face, and if that’s not fucking hilarious i don’t know what is.

anyway, andrew is now holding neil’s arm. neil just blinks, looks at him for a second, and goes “drew? when did you get here?”

andrew, now trying very hard not to laugh, is all like “time for bed” and drags neil back to their dorm.

neil has no memory of any of this happening until allison shows him the video she took.

andrew assures him that it was funny, but he still uses it to win arguments for a month afterwards.

Evan: there's a puddle here

Barty: *kicks Evan into it*

relationship between kevin and thea only existed to establish and distance andreil from kevin. it’s so unnecessary it’s just there, but it BRINGS NOTHING to the plot. like i see why nora put kevin in a relationship and yeah it might’ve worked if it wasn’t SO FUCKING AUWFUL. i hate kevin/thea with my whole heart and just want my boy kevin to be happy and with someone fucking else.

Eruri and their 3 daughters 😚

[Утро, Большой зал, мародёры не отошли от пьянки]

Регулус: *проходит мимо*

Джеймс: Какой же ты красавчик, Блэк. Просто ВАУ!

Сириус, скрежеща зубами: Я щас надеюсь, он это мне.

Джеймс: Эй, Рейджи!

Регулус: *нехотя оборачивается*

Джеймс: И ебёт же тебя кто-то. Везёт ему.

Регулус, с усмешкой: Тоже хочешь?

Джеймс: Еще спрашиваешь? Конечно!

Регулус: Я попрошу, может и тебя выебет.

Учителя в Большом зале: …

Сириус: *горд, пока не понял, что его маленького братика кто-то ебёт*

Ремус: *не обращает внимание, морально готовясь успокаивать Блэка*

Барти и Эван: *аплодируют стоя*