It’s Actually Disgusting Me That People Are Choosing To Forget About Palestine Not Even A Full Year

Guys please give me your bsd disability headcanons I require sustenance

im going to get my artwork done ^_^ *gets sleepy**gets sleepy**gets sleepy**gets sleepy**gets sleepy**gets sleepy**gets sleepy**gets sleepy**gets sleepy**ge

This ^^^

I have seen so many people misconstrue this part of Atsushi’s journey and not quite grasp this scene for what it really is. It’s great to see someone break it down a bit.

i want to talk about the moment that both made me fall in love with atsushi nakajima as a character, and which made me realize that I was probably going to get obsessed with BSD.

specifically, it was this moment.

words can not describe how important this moment was to me, and how vital this is to both atsushi as a character and his relationship with dazai as a whole.

as someone who is currently living with my abusive parents, this was something that resonated with me a lot — oftentimes, media when attempting to portray abuse (specifically parental abuse) and victims of abuse, does 1 out of 2 things:

1. Tries to justify the abuse and protect the parents — having the kids be okay with the treatment they recieved.

2. Has the kids utterly despise their parents with no shred of good feelings.

And whilst, sure, both of these can happen — and I'm sure there are victims who actually feel like this — it's not the most common response.

Speaking from my own experience — I don't know how to feel about my parents. If they died, I wouldn't know what face to make. I hate them more than anyone else, but at the same time, I grew up with them. I hate them, but I also love them. If they died, I don't know how I'd feel about it. And we get to see Atsushi having that exact breakdown — the elation over the person you hate dying, versus the grief and frustration and confusion. Abuse isn't simple, and feelings aren't simply — your abuser dying isn't something that's clean cut, it comes with a million different conflicting confusing emotions.

And the fact that Atsushi is allowed to have these feelings, is allowed to hate the headmaster, is allowed to grieve without forgiveness, is so important. BSD doesn't try to justify his abuse — it's okay to mourn someone that hurt you even if you don't like them. Their death — or their intentions — don't make forgiveness a necessity.

And even moreso, the fact that he gets explicitly told that regardless of the fact that that abuse was what molded him into the person he is today and has helped him survive, and the fact that the headmaster had good intentions, it was bad and unforgivable, is extremely important.

dazai not forcing atsushi to feel a certain way about his abuser, and encouraging him to mourn without forgiveness and to actually feel, is an incredibly important moment — i doubt that i'm only speaking for myself here when i say that when dealing with these subject matters, these are the types of things we'd like to hear.

the fact that dazai is the character telling atsushi this isn't lost on me, either — considering that earlier on this chapter, he sent ryuunosuke to tell atsushi about the headmaster, and they had this interaction:

everything about this is so fascinating and well written — from atsushi having an extremely realistic breakdown over the death of his abuser, to dazai telling him that he has zero obligation for forgiveness — and the implications that he's aware that what he's done to ryuunosuke is wrong regardless of intentions, is fascinating.

to me, atsushi nakajima has always felt human in a way most protagonists don't — his trauma impacts him, he has complex messy feelings that can't be easily resolved. it's his choice what to do with his emotions, and all others can do is give advice, and let him figure out how to deal with them.

atsushi nakajima crying over the man who simultaneously raised him and made his life a living hell is accurate in a way that almost hurts.

(slightly unrelated, but i sure was accurate with this prediction from a month ago, huh!)

Is it just me or is there a sudden influx of people referring to things as their “spirit animals” again…?

Atsushi with more non-human features. Atsushi with reflective eyes that creep out (some of) the ADA. Atsushi with pupils that contract into slits like a cat's when the area is bright. Atsushi with small fangs, canines sharper than a normal persons. Atsushi with heightened senses, who picks up on small details that even Ranpo can't. Atsushi who has naturally more animalistic behaviors and movements. Atsushi who shows affection in strange ways, like headbutting or slow blinking. Atsushi who's ability is wholly a part of him, ingrained in his very being.

Triple it.

lord take all of my pain and sufferig and give it to elon musk

thinking about how stormbringer makes a point to emphasise dazai being unpredictable and no one knowing how he works or what hes thinking. even adam, who is a literal robot with predictive analysis shit going on, cant figure out what dazai is doing. but chuuya looks him straight in the eye, says, "I know how you work." and proceeds to nail exactly what dazais thinking with almost no indication of it at all.

Everyone. Do you realize what this boy is begging for? Do you even fathom the weight of what he just asked?

This is the same boy who declared the lengths he'd go to in order to live wholeheartedly.

And now he's begging to die. Just to save his friends. The only people he can call family. Without even an ounce of hesitation.

The devastation in his eyes. The desperation in his voice. I can't take it anymore-

Thinking about Tachihara deciding to stay with the Mafia after everything's over.

Thinking about the government refusing to give him his next monthly surgery since he's no longer a Hunting Dog.

Thinking about him accepting and coming to terms with the fact that he's going to die, and even saying his goodbyes to his friends in the mafia.

Thinking about Hirotsu, Gin, Higuchi, Kouyou, Chuuya, all refusing to let him die like this, and scrambling to find a way to save him.

Thinking about Chuuya and Kouyou threatening the hospitals to give him the surgeries, and Gin and Higuchi sneaking around to find something that could help.

And then it hits them. The solution, which now seems so obvious in hindsight.

Thinking about Chuuya on the phone with the Detective Agency, and of course it's Dazai who picks up the other end.

Thinking about him sitting in the office, head in his hands, as he hears Chuuya asking him to let Yosano go to the Mafia base for a while.

Thinking about Dazai, out of genuine concern for her, refusing to let her go back to the Port Mafia.

Thinking about Yosano being out the door before Dazai even puts the phone down, because it's Michizō Tachihara. This is Shunzen's younger brother, of course she has to help him.

Thinking about Yosano, when she arrives at the PM base, not having to hurt him even a little bit to use her ability, because he's already that far gone, that broken.

Thinking about her sitting by his side, wondering if when he wakes up he's going to hate her for using the same ability on him that killed his brother.

But when Tachihara wakes up, all he can say to the doctor is "thank you," because he genuinely means it. Because of Yosano's ability, he's healed completely. He has no commitment to the Hunting dogs now.

(If i end this with "he's free" is that cringe?)

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