Get This Outfit Here

Really sick of always being someone's emotional punching bag...

Friends

Friends: daddy kinks are soo weird!

Me: *sweats profusely* yeah! H-haha..

Friends: its sooo nasty!

Me: *sweats even more* h-haha.. i-i gotta go i-i left uh..the oven on *runs away* ABORT MISSION ABORT MISSION.

All of the Corpses on Everest were Once Very Motivated People

I just realized that “homeowner” has “meow” in the middle of it and now I can’t stop reading it as “ho-meow-ner”.

Why isn’t there a superhero category on Netflix yet?

Reading my mind