”diversity Is Bad”

Humans Are Crazy

Aliens have such different gender and biology from humans that none of them menstruate. So imagine this.

Alien: Human Steve, why did I find blood on the lavatory floor?

Steve: Oh, that's just Karen.

Alien: What??

Steve: Human females bleed from their reproductive organs once every month for five to seven days.

Alien: wHAT?!

Steve, calmly: Yeah, they can lose enough blood in a lifetime to kill ten grown men.

Alien: WHaT ?!?!

Karen, walking in: Steve, I need A FUCKING break. And chocolate. And a heating pad. I'll be in my sleeping quarters. Also, I threw up.

Steve: Okay, take the day off, I'll bring you your stuff in a bit.

Alien: *jots down in notebook* Human females are indestructible and fearsome. Regard them with respect.

EDIT: I swear, if this is the thing that makes me Tumblr famous, I’m gonna blow a braincell. And I don’t have many of those left, so…

Edit 2: Guys. Guys. What?! My grumpy menstrual rant is in no way worthy of being tumblr famous. *is mildly to severely confused/thankful/bumfuddled*

Edit 3: Why is this still getting notes wtf

or, Alternatively,

So, you're finally awake, noona hoksi namjachingu isseoyo

so, you’re finally awake, onii-chan

rating my favorite musical artist names

Stray Kids: 5/10. Points deducted for age discrepancy. Considering that none of them are orphans, I don't believe the Stray part at all.

(G)I-DLE: 0/10, complete nonsense.

TOMORROW X TOGETHER: 4/10. Points deducted for aggressiveness. Good positivity, though.

Yaelokre: 9/10. Sounds like a faerie name.

Laufey: 4/10. Not a Frost Giant.

BABYMETAL: 9/10. Good job with the obvious name, people.

bbno$: 6/10, thought it was pronounced BEE BEE NO SSSS.

Thousand foot krutch: 7/10, are they okay? Why? Are they legs broken?

Breaking Benjamin: 0/10 DONT HURT BENJAMIN YOU PSYCHOS

Bring Me The Horizon: 1/10 how the hell do I do that

Evanescence: ?/10 what even is an 'evanescence'?

Linkin Park: 3/10 thought it was LinkedIn Park and what? Are we middle-aged business people listening to muzak?

Fish In A Birdcage: 10/10 amazing, need I say more?

Neoni: 3/10 feels like gibberish to be honest

Imagine Dragons: 5/10 points deducted for making me use my brain

YUNGBLUD: 7/10 I need more child sacrifice in my life, don't I?

STARSET: 2/10 are we filming a space movie?

CLANN: 10/10 very faerie oriented, much likings.

Livingston: 4/10 is it the name? The Place? Points deducted for confusingness.

Radiohead: 9/10 like a TVhead but more creative

Creepy Nuts: 8/10 points deducted for sex jokes

AURORA: 4/10 good nature/Disney reference, but altogether a bit boring

TX2: 2/10 only two points, should be obvious

League of Legends: 8.5/10 nice alliteration

Paramore: 9/10 I see what this is doing

System of a Down: 3/10 what's a down and why does it need a system?

Måneskin: ?/10 what? How do you pronounce the Å?

Hello,

I hope my message finds you well 🌸

I am Momen Al Mdhoun, a graphic designer and a father to 2 adorable kids, I need your help to get my voice heard and amplified by sharing my family's campaign?

Your help may save us from genocide and famine 💔

Please reblog my post and donate if you can 🙏🏻

✅Vetted by @gazavetters , my number verified on the list is ( #291 )✅

Thank you 🌸 🌸

hello peoples

we have an opportunity

REBLOG FOR GAZAAAAA

reblog to save a dude, reblog and the frogs will love you.

-the frog Whisperer

What do the frogs think of the osemanverse?

And where would they get frog sizes books?

🤨🤨🤨

Questions

So, um, funny story?

Minerva McGonagall named her kids Charlie, Oliver, and Tori.

Charlie, coincidentally, is currently dating a frog named Nichard (or Nick for short).

Tori is aroace.

Oliver is too young to date.

Frog Size Books are available at Barnes & Noble and a queer bookstore in downtown Chicago, LA, Seoul, Tokyo and London.

The frogs are nerds.

Why is it that when dudes wake up and have morning voice, it’s sexy and hot, but when I wake up, I sound like a trans dude a month on T?

Like, hot? But my Christian society thinks it’s the devil?

it is so funny how people send me hate being like "touch grass you soggy mf"

bitch i been touching grass i am a literal fantasy cosplayer

i literally have a six foot long wooden dowel that i use as a staff for twirly stick cardio

nature is my kingdom

i can tell different kinds of poison plants from just the shape of the berries

maybe you need to touch grass

idk

get some of that rage out

love yall

The link is here! ⤵️

Tumblr

Harry Potter Headcanon Makers • Community on Tumblr

People Who Make Harry Potter Headcanons

If you'd like to join, please make a request! I review all requests personally.

Hi

It's me

Who here would join a community of people who make Harry Potter headcanons? That's literally all we'd do.

I ask this because I'm writing a fanfiction that is going to be a re-write of the books, but from the viewpoint of side characters; and I want people to give me ideas for things to add for worldbuilding stuff.

I love using hcs in my work, but I'm dumb and am bad at making them myself.

(If this does end up happening, I will credit every single person in the community in the fic ♡)

TL;DR, I'm looking for Harry Potter geeks and writers to start a Harry Potter headcanon community with.

GUYS. MOOSEN.

Moosen. Is that the plural of moose? Whatever.

Moosen are FREAKY. Like, 7 feet tall, huge horns, CARniVOReS?! WhAT?

When you see an elk and you go: Oh, a large deer! That’s an elk. But when you see an elk and go: DEAR LORD, IT’S AN ELDRITCH HORROR FROM THE DAWN OF TIME, that is a fear-instilling, utterly terrifying MOOSE.

It looks like an orc should be riding to battle on them. “Ride, Bullwinkle, ride! Lead me to GloRiouS victory!”

What the heck. You can’t tell me there’s not a God, ‘cause nothing else is creative and crafty enough to keep these things alive for this long.