“Every Part Of Me Is Lesbian.”

"Lungs are probably everywhere"

“It’s not porn, one of them is on fire!”

"God is a pop culture icon."

"Tell me what pen you use, WITCH!"

“God is dead. We have killed him. My tits hurt.”

"Are we implying the himbo is a seagull?"

“Nothing is ever romantic if one person involved is dead!”

He ate his friend. He ate his fucking friend

Convesation between my mum and brother

Brother: He was in the way so we killed him

Mum: You killed your friend in his sleep?

B: It gets worse…

M: …

B: …

M: …

B: We skinned him.

M: …

B: We needed the leather!

So nobody said anything funny today, but I just witnessed two guys pick up a bench and attempt to walk away with it, and I can’t just not acknowledge that

"Kill him, lesbians!"