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Alone - Blog Posts
Alone
When you say “I feel so alone,”
do you really mean it?
Do you feel cold all the way down to your bones?
Do you want to go through that door you see with the sign saying exit?
When you say “I am alone,”
do you mean you have no one?
Or do you mean that deep down inside, you don’t feel whole?
Just take a minute to think of all the battles you’ve won.
Up until now,
you’ve always felt weak.
Always being the one that has to bow.
Just because you’ve never been able to freely speak.
Well, you aren’t alone...
by which I mean you aren’t alone physically.
It’s okay to let it be known...
‘Cause you aren’t the only one that wants to be free.
Don't be sad when I go .. don't pretend you didn't know, Berry that pain deep inside just like me it had to go
“Death is not the greatest loss in life. The greatest loss is what dies inside us while we live.”
— Unknown
Unmmmmm for you maybe , pfffft I'm a broken ass gay bitch .. I need an want what I want k 😩 shhhhhh 🖤
“You don’t need people who don’t need you.”
— Unknown
I’m sick and tired of you playing this game. Fiddling with my heart and head like you’re a toddler playing with his toys. I’ve had enough of the kindergarten games you throw every which way, trying to get more people to play along, trapping them in a world where not only your love is nonexistent, but all of reality as well. Just stop playing and let me go.
It hurts
-it’s always the same story -what story? -the story of how the girl loves the boy, but he didn’t love her back
The story of my life #2
There was a girl. She never looked nice. She looked like art, and art wasn’t supposed to look nice, it was supposed to make you feel something. There was a boy. He never really understood. He presumed the top layer was the only layer and never knew the truth. She was a smart girl until she fell in love. He was an oblivious boy until everything was over.
Maddie; The story of my life #1
When I'm alone
Sometimes I wish I'd be at Hogwarts. Just to be awkward alone there.. but surrounded by magic.
𝐓𝐡𝐢𝐬 𝐜𝐨𝐧𝐟𝐮𝐬𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐜𝐚𝐥𝐥𝐞𝐝 𝐥𝐨𝐯𝐞
I want to be on my own travel the world flirt with every guy who gives me an irresistible smile
I want to be with you talking all night long fill my empty nights with your love
I want to be on my own work on myself do whatever the fuck I want when I want
I want to be with you writing endless love letters dancing in the snow until you throw me on the bed
I want to be free I want to be the woman you love
I want to love myself I want to love you
I want all of my thoughts to disappear.
_____________________________
She believes she knows my ache,
she thinks she understands my sorrow,
because once, she too was broken.
My pain is
a slow implosion,
a daily funeral
with no mourners,
a storm I must swallow
so she may walk beneath clear skies.
She remains with another,
while I cradle her chaos in the dark,
I try hold her world steady,
bleeding in silence,
so she never sees the stain.
Quietly tearing at the seams
just to keep her whole.
I laugh when I want to scream.
I smile so she can cry.
I disappear so she can shine.
And each day,
I wake inside a coffin
just to hold her hand.
This doesn't feel like love.
This is a man burning
so she may feel warm,
and never knowing
that the smoke
is me.
-Cyrus K.
And all I loved, I loved alone.
~ Alone by Edgar Allan Poe
La vita é troppo corta, ridi quando puoi, scusati quando devi e allontanati da ció che non puoi cambiare.
me
six will return in little nightmares 3 no im not having insane levels of cope
As I fly and travel the world, my longing to share my experiences with you continues to grow. I stare out the window and picture what our life would look like together. Our dynamic together, what our kids would look like, how many people we would impact with our work. I believe our lives would be incredible. Although you're not picturing your life with me, I will continue to stare out the window and dream of the day I don't have to look outside a plane window to see a beautiful view but instead, stare into your green eyes and know that my entire world is sitting right in front of me.
Look, I love the Castlevania series and the Netflix adaptation made 3 great seasons ("Um there are 4 seasons" LIKE I SAID, 3 GREAT SEASONS), but we have got to talk about how disappointing it is that the main trio never met or even knew the existence of Hector and Isaac - or honestly, that entire half of the plot. I will forever find it weird that the show set up two related but never intersecting plot threads (and arguably a third, go figure during the worst season).
It's sweet and empowering that both of them found their own ways to live before and after Dracula's death, with Isaac being a total badass and even progressing to a better person despite seeing how unfair, cruel, and rude the world is - to the point that he defeats Carmilla not JUST because she was partly responsible for Dracula's death but because he actually wanted to make the world a better place. But even though Isaac could arguably be founding an entire empire and generation of peace, he and Hector don't even seem to know about Alucard's existence or contributions, let alone Trevor and Sypha.
We can debate Hector and Lenore's fucked up relationship all day, but in the end the two of them DID end up bonding through all the lies and deceit. They were able to actually talk to one another and have the other listen; in the end, both of them were just born in different worlds on different sides. Lenore genuinely seemed to want to settle things peacefully, but she got left behind in a world that valued only overwhelming strength; she decides she can't live as a prisoner even though Hector was no doubt stronger than her for enduring his own imprisonment and subjugation, but I think Lenore was already on her way to losing herself. Despite what she did to Hector, she wanted to at least believe she understood him; even though she was a sympathetic vampire, she still believed knowing enough to control someone was the only way they could be friends - so when it turns out Hector was plotting the downfall of Carmilla and her buddies, unfortunate Lenore had to be betrayed as well. Even if Hector wanted her to live, she was a living contradiction. A vampire who is physically very strong and intimidating, but a woman who other male vampires have looked down upon, and even male humans. A creature who feeds on humans, but one who wants to settle things peacefully. She absolutely had a role in Carmilla's gang of women just surviving, but in Carmilla's mad conquest, she was useless at best and a hindrance at worst.
In the end, Lenore was one of the few vampires that might have been sympathetic to the human side of the argument, but she physically couldn't live like that. I believed Lenore genuinely wasn't capable of turning her whole worldview upside down and aiding humanity in any way - being beneath them. Dracula opened himself up to one human and it destroyed him; he saved Hector and Isaac, but he also sacrificed himself and forced Isaac away, that was the extent of his personal affairs with them. I think it's fundamentally difficult for vampires to adopt human ideologies and empathy, making Alucard the only vampire ally we really have in the series - because he's only half. Unlike Alucard, she is a full vampire. She has a divide that she can't just bridge like he can.
Imagine if Alucard got to meet the only other humans beside his mother who genuinely looked up to and cared about his father. What would Isaac and Hector have to say to the son of the man they had admired and then lost as well? Imagine Alucard meeting another human who may have even fallen in love with a vampire, but who understands how far their worlds pulled each other apart. Or maybe Sypha can relate to having her eyes opened to a world outside her Speaker family. Imagine a discussion with Lenore about what it means to be caught between wanting to make peace with humans and knowing how much harm they cause - her actually getting a sympathetic vampire perspective from someone like Alucard who wouldn't look down on her.
Imagine the tension that could come from Trevor meeting a Forgemaster, Isaac trying to explain his control over Night Creatures and his ability to even make them fight for a sympathetic cause. Both Isaac and Trevor have experience being the outcasts, understanding how awful humans can be, but they both found their way to still fighting for the right thing. Trevor understands why killing Dracula's wife would make him want to purge the world in retribution, but he still knows humans are worth fighting for. Isaac fully abandoned his faith in humanity and believed in Dracula completely, and even THEN he managed to find the good amongst the rabble. Is it right to make Night Creatures from the dead, even if they were bad people? Even if it's to champion a good cause? Even if Hector and Isaac have full control over them without a potential for any sort of rebellion?
What I'm saying is, I love the idea of a new Castlevania series, but nothing will beat the OG season 1 and 2, and season 3 should have been answering questions and tying up loose ends - not going off on at least 3, 4 tangents that were just meant to come out of nowhere and make things shitty again after our happy ending and I guess they're kinda related but not really, so now we can fix the new shitty stuff and have ANOTHER happy ending and avoid showing anything resembling resolutions, just teaser after teaser for the fanfics to finish up.
Anyway so I'm going to the fanfics and if I don't come back, tell the Final Fantasy rants I love them-
Here’s what I mean by “no one is around”.
Seriously, are they busy or something? And now I’m stuck listening to this music. Ugh…