How Did This Happen - Blog Posts

I just found out about the true way pineapples grow and I am horrified.

Just why?

Trying to get all my world building ideas down on paper is hard. my head hurts. They're all in there it's just the act of putting them down on the page that's hard cuz I'm like it's really simple there's not that much to put down. Then a little while later I look back up and I've written three pages of world building notes and I'm still not even close to done.

I have unfortunately burned the "For you" button from tiktok into my screen.

PLEASE HELP ME

New lil human friends

Cocky little bastard and a grumpy old man

I'm digging in odd influx of people finding my Rendog content.

Yall are gonna be extra happy soon.

How...?!

Reading old messages about oc personalities is wild, because like wdym this is how we viewed Uranus 💔like nowadays he only went to two parties in college and is literally studying to be a teacher/is one LMAO Walter literally drops out his sophomore year (granted there are a lot more factors for that) and parties a lot more

you ever just start a multi-chapter fic, and then proceed to forget it exists for a solid six months

Okay so I was playing Pocket Morty's and I played the game awhile back and stopped playing (I don't remember why) for quite a bit so the mortys I caught where kinda high tier because I caught them before some updates but I'm also kind of really bad at the game so all my mortys where dazed except one who was at half health so I decided to try and see if I could grind a bit before he got dazed I didn't want to wast my items before a boss fight and I accidentally walked right in front of a trainer npc who challenged me I didn't really care as I thought I was going to lose so I half-assed it but right when I was on the npc's last morty (mine a level 10 scissor type his a level 9 rock type) his was on a fourth of his health mine at about 15 my attack missed and his hit and I just thought 'okay I'm dead' but my morty's hp landed on ONE and I attacked and the npc's morty died and mine grew a level and I just died laughing

TLTR: walked into a trainer battle with one morty at half hp walked out a level higher with four hp

That casual moment of realizing you’re an otherkin and the kintypes have weird overlaps and/or conflicting feelings.

Enderman kin - supposed to hate water

Seafolk kin - I love water

Dragon kin - I want to be in the sky not water

It kills me-

This realization of my kintypes explains a lot:

Endfolk kin:

Hate eye contact, love purple and darkness, I’m tall and lanky already but feel like I need to be TALLER 👹

I like picking things up like an Endfolk too :}

Seafolk kin:

I specifically feel like a leviathan sea folk, I’m a 50 foot long, glowing scales, head fins, large clawed, lots of frills and fins, CHARCOAL SKINNED BEAST, yet a gentle giant!!!

With dragon kin, I kinda already knew (I have a dragon sona)

Green scales, 3 pairs of horns, dark green & purple webbing for my wings, larger than most dragons, tall and imposing yet also lean and long.

I want to fly, I want to swim, I want to blip through the fabric of reality and leave purple sparkles in my wake.

And all this is also paired with already being a magical and supernatural and mundane entity that’s SOMEHOW BECOME AN ELDRITCH DEITY AND I ACCIDENTALLY IMMORTALIZED MYSELF WITH SHEER SPITE WHEN I WAS 9

*Insert Sad Eldritch blob here*

Gndzgbdfhvdf (´°̥̥̥̥̥̥̥̥ω°̥̥̥̥̥̥̥̥｀)

Emojis to try and describe myself:

Endfolk: ✨💜🖤👁️‍🗨️🪻🌑☮️🔮🪬👾🐦‍⬛🐈‍⬛🍬🪁🎆🧬

Dragon: 🌿🐉🦎🎆🌌🦚🏔️💎🔐🔆💚💜📜

Leviathan Seafolk: 🌑🌊🦈🖤🔊📜🩻🔮🎆🌪️🪷🪸🦚🪼🐋🦭

Eldritch Deity: 💜🌌✖️👁️‍🗨️🕸️🥀🌒🌋🎆🪬🔮🧬🔐🔗📖

I have basically no body fat, and what I do have is for some reason concentrated on my glutes and thighs (IT SHOULD BE ON MY ABDOMEN, BC THERES SUPPOSED TO BE A LAYER OF FAT COVERING YOUR ORGANS)

I look like a stick and weigh a LOT more than people think I would.

Me having an absurd amount of muscle mass is only thing keeping me from looking like a starving Victorian orphan who fell down the old and uncleaned well in the middle of winter.

(Oddly specific I know- that’s what made me make this Tumblr post)

ITS BEEN LESS THAN AN HOUR- GUYS PLS YOURE GONNA MAKE MY OLD ASS PHONE EXPLODE 😭😭😭😭

I had this idea about Phineas and Ferb:

Perry pays the bills and taxes, but one month he gets so caught up in work that he temporarily forgets.

The parents both thought that the other was paying all the bills, so then they’re like “wait…if IM not paying the bills, and YOURE not paying the bills…who is??”

And then the family finds Perry paying the bills and stuff, but he goes platypus mode and so he’s just like “krrrgrggg” and instead of going “WTF how is Perry paying the bills??” The family is just like

“awww! Thanks Perry, you’re such a good platypus!! Good boy, Perry!” 🥰🥰

So then if there’s a court case over the house and the judge is like “okay who pays the bills?” Both the parents sigh before going “bring him in, boys”

and Phineas & Ferb walk in holding Perry and the whole court’s like “what???”

And then they show a video of Perry paying the pills & Taxes and the courts like:

“YOU ARENT EVEN QUESTIONING WHY YOUR PET PLATYPUS IS PAYING THE BILLS??? WHERE DOES HE GET THE MONEY??” And the whole family just shrugs and is like “we were worried that if we questioned him he might think he’s not supposed to do that, so we just gave him some yummy treats and called him a good boy :]”

YOU THINK I’M JOKING BUT I’M DEAD SERIOUS

Directly copy pasted from where I just sent it in a discord group chat:

MY AUDHD KICKED IN AND I HYPERFIXATED ON SORTING ALL OF MY ART SUPPLIES FOR THE PAST 4 HOURS

I PUT OFF EATING UNTIL I WAS IN SO MUCH PAIN I COULDNT FOCUS

THEN I INSTANTLY WENT BACK AT IT

IM TRYING TO CONVINCE MY BRAIN THAT IM DONE FOR NOW BUT IT WANTS IT ALL DONE WITHOUT ANY MORE INTERRUPTIONS

HALP

My brain when trying to list achievements in my life for a fake resume for a class assignment

Ok, I’m immortal. I’ve fallen off so many cliffs that my adrenaline doesn’t even kick in anymore, I’ve accidentally ingested 5X the lethal dose of caffeine, I’ve accidentally drank bleach and wasn’t even nauseous (I said ‘2/10, wouldn’t try again’), Ive lost so much blood that I should’ve been at the ER but was just fine and cleaned it up, I’ve been hit by a semi truck (only like 25MPH tho, I still got knocked pretty far) and got up and was just really dizzy, etc.

I thought it was luck, but the lethal doses scratched that out. I thought it was plot armor, that was obviously out the window pretty quick. I thought it was one of the Eldritch deities I have the favor of (don’t ask, I’m not really sure how it happened either.) they didn’t do it. I was so confused… until I remembered

I always say ‘I LIVE OUT OF PURE SPITE FOR REALITY’

I CAN LITERALLY INFLUENCE REALITY IF I PUT IN ENOUGH EFFORT BUT I DIDNT REALIZE I COULD JUST FORCE SOME RULES OF REALITY TO NOT APPLY TO ME

IVE BEEN LITERALLY IMMORTAL OUT OF SPITE SINCE I WAS NINE- HOW DID THIS HAPPEN????

You ever look at your genetics and go “how the ever living FUCK did this happen” because I am directly descended from the strongest Old Ireland clan and the second strongest Scottish clan… ON OPPOSITE SIDES??? I’m double Celtic royalty-

I’m so stupidly tall, and then I’m also pretty sure I’m developing gigantism… I’m 5’11” STILL GROWING AND THEN THERES GIGANTISM?? I don’t wanna be like 8 feet tall bro- a normal house is already a lot and a custom built house would cost my kidney-

The only reason I look like I’m not starving is that extra mass isn’t body fat, no no no, that’s pure MUSCLE-

Ya know how most little kids are chihuahuas, because they don’t have strength for their rage? WELL I WAS A DAMNED TASMANIAN DEVIL BECAUSE I SOMEHOW KNEW A BUNCH OF WEAK POINTS AND FIGHTING TACTICS WITHOUT LEARNING???? Was I James Bond in a past life or some shit???

My molars are sharp…molars as in THE HERBIVORE TEETH. I’ve tried looking it up and didn’t get an answer, I EVEN ASKED MY DENTIST AND THEY COULDNT COME UP WITH A SURE FIRE ANSWER EITHER??

I have that weird mutation that makes it so I can consume other peoples blood without worry. How do I know this? One time my bestie scraped her elbow and when I was looking at it my autism brain made me automatically lick it- I was like “did- did I just eat your blood-??” And she was like “yeah- I think so-“ and we both proceeded to burst out laughing.

My favorite part of my fucked genetics: MY JOINTS! I simultaneously have joint pain and am hyper flexible- (my jaw can also unhinge without damage but ignoring that-) so sometimes I bend 2 degrees and my spine dissipates, other times I can CONTORT TO FIT INTO A FUCKING CLOTHING DRYER???? my bestie knows that and the fact that it’s my favorite hide and seek spot and we always cackle at people’s faces when they FINALLY find me- 😭

"oh.. thats gore of my comfort character" except i'm the one making the gore of the comfort character

please tag your most obscure blorbo

Oh shi—

it's already humiliating when you get into new media, take one look at a character, and know that one's gonna be living in your head indefinitely, but it's absolutely nothing compared to looking at a character and thinking eh i don't think i'd ever have strong feelings about that one he's kinda boring and then he sits quietly in the back of your brain poking idly at synapses and thoughts every once in a while until one day you wake up and realise oh. oh fuck. category 5 blorbo moment, how the ever loving fuck did this happen to me

I personally cannot see it 💀 Tag: @1-800-asuka (Im curious now 👀)

found a link on my stuff for you page that tells you who you write like

annoying my moots for the 472818911th time but i’m curious (i’m sorry-)

@ri-days @kissyomi @bokubear @cafe-de-lune @sakusaww +anyone who wants to do it !

Adventure to be continued...