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Maladaptive Daydreaming - Blog Posts
Sometimes I think about going outside and making some real friends, but then I remember real people are assholes.
Iβm so fucked up, my emotional support imaginary friends have emotional support imaginary friends.
Things my OCs have said with no context. Part 4.
Me: You and me are going to commit a heist.
Atlas: Do I have any say in this.
Me: No. No you do not.
π π π π π π π π π π π π π π π π
Troy: Shut up and eat your cardboard!
π π π π π π π π π π π π π π π π
Hayden: Donβt fall in love with the first guy you see.
Connor: you canβt tell me what to do.
π π π π π π π π π π π π π π π π
Me: what do you know about advanced environmental science?
Serana: Iβm twelve
π π π π π π π π π π π π π π π π
Me: do you have any enemies to lovers movie recommendations?
Troy: Toy Story.
π π π π π π π π π π π π π π π π
Connor: *tries to flush furby down the toilet*
Me: what are you doing?
Connor: He needs to pay for his sins.
π π π π π π π π π π π π π π π π
Me: Can everyone stop spitting in the milk isle? Itβs a biohazard.
π π π π π π π π π π π π π π π π
Connor: maybe the real American Dream was the gay sex we had along the way.
π π π π π π π π π π π π π π π π
Atlas: some people wear turtlenecks, but not me. Iβm cool.
π π π π π π π π π π π π π π π π
Troy: it tasted like earwax
C.J. How do you know what earwax tastes like?
Troy: donβt act like youβve never tried it.
π π π π π π π π π π π π π π π π
Me: Why do I always fall in love with depressed, greasy boys?
Fierro: Are you calling me depressed greasy boy?
Me: Iβm not not calling you that.
π π π π π π π π π π π π π π π π
Me: Itβs kind of boring around here if you ignore the seven foot tall shadow monsters that try to murder you in your sleep.
I may have just created an imaginary family because mine is .... Interesting
DAYDREAM
ββThey say a soul with a vivid imagination can live in their own worldβ¦I just never thought id get so lost in mine.ββ - Joud Aburashed
stfu im talking to my fictonal characters π½
I'm sure whether you are a writer or a fan of other creative work, you can relate to this! I hope you enjoyed this week's installment of 'Slices of Gremlin'! I am going to continue updating every Tuesday, and if you would like to support the comic and get early access, you can sign up to be a member of the 'Little Creature Club' on Ko-Fi!
me, music and daydreaming =D
Its my normal
is it normal to live about 2% of your life in reality and the rest in your little mind with your little characters playing out little stories?
That feeling when you have a whole complex universe of ocs in your head but you canβt draw or find the motivation to write so they just stay in your maladaptive daydreams π
If I have nothing I have my imagination
Story concept I've been toying around with:
Maladaptive daydreamer is actually a dimension hopper or something, but the two realities keep blending together in weird ways, and then there is some kind of plot, too.
Totally not inspired by personal experience.
Looking at screenshot posts on Pinterest and I-
I have never considered myself neurodivergent and Iβm a functional person in general (I think)
But maladaptive daydreaming and executive dysfunction are very real for me
I have gone through things beyond your understanding (tiktok getting banned)
I saw the origins of Marlowe Bay. Marlowe Schultz centuries before ventured yet nobody lived in the bay. Nobody. All that remained were just rubble and old carvings of odd beasts. His handwriting grew shakier the longer heβd stay in the bay despite creating a settlementβ¦it wasnβt much of a colony considering that any sign of people there were long gone. Or they all disappeared or died due to the conditions. Bones covered in grime were found too.
He saw βThe Fathomlessβ in the water after falling overboard. He described it as the colorlessness of closing oneβs eyes. That there was nothing that remained and that he could hear only sonorous bellowing creaks. And as time passed he went in the caverns of the coves and he saw somethingβ¦but I only saw him and the primal fear in those gray eyes and the scream I heard before I woke up was haunting. I didnβt see what he saw. Some parts of the area I couldnβt comprehend for some reason so they were just blacked out.
Iβve been having these recurring dreams of a seaside town called Marlowe Bay from the POV of a young man named Osborne Scarborough living in his dadβs lighthouse and this is gonna be a long post of everything Iβm gonna share that I saw in each dream in this town (more to come in reblogs)
1. Thereβs a washed up ivory clawfoot bathtub on the beach full of rope net, seaweed, a sea star, a gold monocle, a leather bag covered in barnacles and grime, and a single crab holding the monocle on the beach.
2. Martha Hampshire the closest neighboring lady with the white and red polka dotted dress and birds nest hair.
3. Fenton the lab mix. I love you Fenton.
4. Mr. Catch and his small fishing boat (accompanied by Fenton) with his marbled false eye and scallop shell tattoo.
5. Something about Osborneβs father causing Osborneβs eyes to tear up just hearing him be mentioned.
6. The young girl standing where the cliff met the pier, with a crab trap on her left foot like a shoe in the mist.
7. The way Osborne puts his gold rimmed glasses in his dadβs blue fisherman hat before he went to bed every night curled up in that big thick blue blanket in the lofty bed of the lighthouse.
one minor inconvenience happens
me, immediately going to retract into myself: yes time to indulge in one of my carefully crafted fantasy universes for hours on end and have no contact with anyone π₯°
specifically a sofia coppola one ౨ΰ§
I honestly love vacuuming because like noice canceling headphones blasting music and nice repetitive motions? Yes. The best combination to torment the little people in my brain.
do you guys ever go "i know i was reading a really good fic earlier, i should get back to that!" and open ao3 just to realize ...oh wait. that was a fic i came up with, and was daydreaming about. its not written :(
Ya'll, I really put off The Magnus Archives for a few months, because I KNEW that i would hyperfixate on it. I FUCKING KNEW IT AND HERE WE ARE 3 DAYS IN ! It's now time to maladaptive daydream about me being in the tma universe because THATS ON MENTAL ILLNESS! π€
Welcome, esteemed guests! Tonight's mental shit show will feature stories such as:
"I've Convinced Myself That All of my Co-workers Hate my Guts and Want me Gone! Do They have a Reason? Probably! But it Wouldn't Matter if They Didn't!"
Brought to you by the Rsd/ Undiagnosed ADHD foundation, The Slow Workers Union, and the Corporation for Teaching Autistics Social Cues.
Followed by: "I'm Trying to Keep Myself From Soiling my Pants and Keep Them From Falling"
Funded by: The Lactose Intolerant Idiot Research Fund, The People Who bought Their Pants Size Too Big and Lost Weight so They Feel Even Bigger Council, and The Belt Hater Advocacy Group
And for the Finale: "They're Making me Work Faster Than I Normally Would and I Can Barely Keep Up. My Body is Tired, and I Want to Quit. I Just Want to Go Home and Do Nothing More Than Sleep for a Year or Two."
Sponsored by: The PRMMI (People's Republic of Mistki and Mommy Issues), Tired Autistics Running on Energy Drinks and Daydreams Inc., www.No-I-wont-go-to-therapy-ill-keep-venting-here.org, and viewers like you :)
Please silence all devices, take any crying children outside, and enjoy the show.
It's silly of me to always wish for people I'm NEVER going to meet
Why does this stupid dumb idiot keeps in triggering himself and suffering cause he's unable to daydream in public.
I am the idiot, and honestly what the hell am I doing .
The Dark Side of Maladaptive Daydreaming
TW: I donβt talk about specific violent topics(just mainly say βi have violent daydreamsβ), but if you donβt want to read anything about the dark side of daydreams just go ahead and skip this one.
Iβm feely kinda shitty and anxious, and to actually be a little more proactive this time I pushed myself to write this overdue post instead of daydreaming. I mean either way Iβll end up daydreaming before I go to bedβ¦moving on.
A couple of weeks ago The Daydreamers was released. And it was a good dip-a-toe-in-the-water introduction about maladaptive daydreaming. Afterwards I read a few tumblr posts about it, and I remember there was one post where anon expressed their frustration with the doc presenting MaDDing as this escape to a happy wonderland. This is a criticism Iβve heard before, and one Iβve had myself.Β
When I first got involved in the MaDD community online I was frustrated to see -what appeared to me - MaDDers not taking it seriously. They were sharing art of their paras, paracosms, writing about their wonder fantasies, and posting memes. To me this came across as almostΒ βlacking a depthβ, I knew that humor is a coping mechanism, but I was upset that there seemed to be so so few posts with in depth dives into the negatives of MaDD. To me it looked like everyone else was peachy with it, while I withering with itβs burden. Thatβs why I started this blog, to create the content I wanted to see(no shame to those who rather post light hearted stuff).
To start off, I always dislike that the wordΒ βdaydreamingβ is included in the name of this condition, becauseΒ βdaydreamingβ has a veryΒ βcuteβ andΒ βinnocuousβ connation in our language.Β And to be frank,Β cute and innocuous are probably the last words Iβd use to describe my daydreams.
My daydreams can contain incredibly dark, morbid, and violent things. There is a common theme of isolation, loneliness, being misunderstood, and martyr complexes. My parame suffering, all the while being criticized and hated by those around them.Β Thatβs a very common theme, being hated because Iβm misunderstood and I am going through some struggle unbeknownst to those around me. I would best title it asΒ βLook at how everyone misjudges and hates me, but I am really a good person whose made sacrifices for others but has been wronged many times but I refuse to open up about it because I am afraid and because I donβt think I deserve to seek help and I am socially anxiousβ.Β
And while there is this common underlying theme, it tends to manifest in disturbing and/or violent ways.Β
*by manifest I mean what the content of the paracosm is.
And if I were to be honest, alot and I mean alot of my paracosms are straight up depressing, and their frequency tends to increase in quantity and disturbance level the more unhappy I am in real life.
But why do I/we do it? My best answer is that itβs a way to live out and externalize negative emotions I/we struggle to express and explore in our actual lives. The daydreaming gives a filter, aΒ βsafe placeβ to externalize, feel, and express these bad feelings. I wonder too if it acts as a disconnecting mechanism, you can experience your emotions through the paras you created, that way you donβt have to feel them as your own emotions that have occurred due to your life circumstances. Can I say itβs bit like a disassociating mechanism? Personally for me Iβve always tended to feel invalidated in my negative feelings. I felt (and still do) that I did not/have not earned sadness. That its stupid for me to be upset so much by something when there are so many other people with so much worse, so I create a fictional world where my parame experiences traumatic events that then make me feel justified to express my negative emotions through my parame. Because obviously those negative emotions make sense in the context of my parameβs life, but my actual life? Absolutely not.
TBH, I was gonna write a few examples of these dark paracosms but I backed out because honestly Iβm still too nervous and scared to share the details. Sure Iβm anonymous on this platform, but I know once somethings out on the internet it stays there forever. And I am afraid of the wrong people finding my post detailing my horrific daydreams and then somehow finding out who I am and they think iβm fucked up and so onβ¦.So this is all for now. These thoughts are from my personal experiences and I donβt speak for every MaDDer.Β
Want to try something new? Try Maladaptive Daydreaming!!!
It's the best way to spend your time when you're alone with your own thoughts!
It has a lot of amazing benefits, including!:
Wasting between a quarter and a half of your day daydreaming instead of doing useful stuff!
Pacing around your room like a caged animal until you feel dizzy and your legs hurt!
Jumping, running or doing sudden movements in the most intense moments that can lead to you accidentally hurting yourself in the furniture from running straight into it!
Making the same faces as the characters to visualize them better in your head!
Daydreaming in public, including the weird movements and faces, and hoping nobody saw you!
Making yourself happy, sad, angry or panicked just by daydreaming something as vividly as possible!
Dropping whatever you were doing just to daydream! Washing yourself? Doing your homework? Paying attention in class? Drawing? No!! Your daydream is more important!!
Imagining yourself as the-nobody-who-turned-into-a-hero-and-is-admired-by-everyone because no one cares about you irl!
Having multiple storylines with the same characters and alternating between them while you try to find the best one to keep!
Stopping the fictional daydream you've worked for almost half of your life just because a furry anime that came out recently has almost the same plot as your daydreams, and feeling like you're stealing their idea!
Switching your daydreams from a fictional world with fictional characters to using real life people!
Daydreaming about situations that have a close to zero chance of happening, and obsessing over them happening!
And if they can happen irl, daydreaming about them until you actually do them!!
Daydreaming about people you'll never meet, and I don't mean only celebrities!
Obsessively daydreaming about said people as a coping mechanism that you'll never meet them in real life!!
Slightly altering your daydream after you find something new about those people, which conflicts with the current storyline!
Having dramatic daydreams about what someone might say and what you'll answer and how you'll feel, only to get an underwhelming answer irl!
Imagining THE worst scenario if something bad happens to someone and you know about it only vaguely, and seeing it so clearly in your head that you panic because you don't know what's actually happening to them irl!
Taking the "thinking about what you could've said in an argument" to the next level and preparing yourself in case one happens based on vague hints that it might happen!
Daydreaming so much about an idea and for a longer period of time, "waking up" and being sad that the daydream wasn't real even though you knew it wasn't real from the get-go!
And this is only my experience! Yours could be completely different! Maybe even better than mine!!
Experts recommend starting it as early as possible, preferably in kindergarten!! So you can daydream for as long as this short life allows you!!
Soon enough you won't want to live in this boring "real" life anymore!
it really do be and my thoughts πβοΈ
"You are so quiet" bro i daydream 80% of my time
You guys know maladaptive daydreaming? Well I heard of it from like an article and I looked it up on tumblr, and it turns out a lot if people do it.
Sometimes it just feels so alienating to be so invested with these fantasy worlds that you make in your mind and I'm glad I'm not alone in this.π
In my own experience I usually start daydreaming on long car rides while listening to music. Or if I really like a t.v show or book and like the way things work or like characters dynamics, I'll implement stories into the world and kinda add myself in.
For example I really enjoyed Soul Eater during my anime phase, and to this day I somtimes start to daydream about it. Although there's this weird side effect about it, where if the thing I'm daydreaming about doesn't have much a story to it anymore because it's over and there's not much more to daydream about I kinda start to lose interest. My posts usually don't get more than like one note, or any at that, but if someone actually reads this for some godforsaken reason. You're not alone in this, and I'd really be interested to hear what you have to say.