Latest Posts by howveryheathers - Page 4

Dean’s sitting at the kitchen table eating meatloaf when it all sort of hits – and he’s desperate to remember it exactly how it happened.

Keep reading

spuffy + making the same joke while fighting for their lives

just your typical nuclear family with three dads, a gay aunt, and a god-child who creates their own pets

dean is hungry. he's always hungry. these days, if he isn't hungry then that means he's sick. so the pain is good. it keeps him awake, keeps him sharp, lets him know he's okay.

sammy is asleep, mouth open around snores. face down on the tiny, cramped single bed they're sharing, he's just slightly quieter than the tv. bleeding body heat against dean's hip and leg, a little sweaty and taking up too much space. alive, safe. splayed out across the mattress.

that's okay, though. dean can't lay down. he's not allowed to sleep until his dad gets home. he's got to stay awake, to watch out for sammy.

the tv flashes, spilling light over the mountains of his knees. this motel room is disgusting. everything reeks of cigarette smoke, staining the walls and sheets and making dean slightly nauseous. that could be the hunger, though.

sometimes when he's really, really hungry like he is now, he feels sick. like his stomach is a hole, swallowing up his insides.

he watches the quiet tv screen— some spanish movie is playing. the subtitles are moving too fast for his eyes to keep up, so he focuses on the colors, watches the shadows rise and swell over his knees.

yesterday was his birthday. dad didn't say a word, just dropped a twenty on the table and left for the bar and didn't come home until after four in the morning. there isn't a case in this town that they've found so far, but apparently the whiskey is good because they've been here for days.

he and sam had breakfast, lunch, and dinner for the first time in months. dean has perfected the art of making a cent stretch. he's eleven years old, now. they even had a pie. it was a little stale, and a stupid splurge. but sammy begged, and dean was helpless to say no because he wanted it just as much.

he doesn't feel any older. sometimes he feels ancient. right now he feels small and paper thin.

he's sort of desperately missing the sandwiches they had for dinner yesterday. there are no leftovers. no food waiting in the cabinets, but that's okay. dad fell asleep and dean stole ten dollars from his wallet.

he won't miss it. sammy will have breakfast. dean can wait a few more hours

it doesn't matter if he's starving.

_

"like this. use the spatula to pull them in from the edges so all the uncooked egg spills out. makes them fluffier. that, and the milk."

dean demonstrates. jack watches like a hawk even though he can't even see over the edge of the stove standing on his own, two little fists gripping the collar of cas's shirt like a lifeline to keep him steady as he leans over.

they're all pressed up together to fit in front of the stove, jack perched on cas's hip, and like this, side-by-side, dean can compare their nearly identical facial expressions. blonde hair and dark brown, the same cleft chin and bright blue eyes.

cas makes an identical face watching dean cook scrambled eggs to the one he does while focused on a hunt, channeling all of his angelic skill and strength for something as trivial as food or as important as measuring spell ingredients. jack is mirroring it almost uncannily.

dean isn't ashamed to admit that he finds it adorable.

he finishes up the eggs under the two careful sets of eyes and turns off the stove, letting cas hand him jack's plate first. a tiny pancake with a chocolate chip smile, two slices of sam's shoeleather bacon, and a small spoonful of eggs. there's already a bowl of fruit waiting for him on the table. jack is very particular about what he eats.

cas sets him down gently and dean hands him his plate, trusting the toddler to make it to the table because jack is always very careful.

"breakfast!" dean leans back to shout down the hall, tugging off his apron. cas's hand is huge and warm in the small of his back as he makes their plate, heaping on a pile of real bacon that won't leave the faint taste of burnt plastic in his mouth when he's finished eating it.

sam comes in first, followed shortly by eileen. his hair is still wet from his morning shower and together, they've been slowly reorganizing the library into something efficient.

they all make their plates and settle down to eat. it's a little crowded around the table, but they make do.

cas doesn't eat much. what he does comes off dean's plate, which was made up specifically in mind of that. .

sam piles so much fruit onto his that it spills over into his eggs and he makes a face, freeing a blueberry only to sentence it to being crushed between his molars.

eileen loves pancakes with fruit. specifically strawberries. dean made her's special, and when she sees that she lights up. it makes him smile, wide and happy, as they sign back and forth over the table, conversing silently.

he's still a little clumsy. cas helps him practice. he's getting better every day.

dean isn't full, yet. but, he isn't starving. he hasn't been in years. he won't ever be again.

jack smears his eggs everywhere, babbles on and on in a mismatch of both english and asl. cas watches him with huge, beautiful eyes. jack is telling them a largely exaggerated tale about a lady at the grocery store yesterday with a service dog whose tail and ears had been dyed rainbow. they've all heard about it twice, now. jack had been absolutely fascinated by the colors and the dog until he got distracted by the cereal aisle.

dean feels so young, for the first time in his entire life. he's home. he's happy. he's safe.

SPN hiatus creations | Week Four | Hugs and Affection

I relate to Buffy sm ✌

some spuffy comms 💥💕

I don't know exactly when they sealed the deal but by the time the show ended they were married

so very married

Thinking about this River Song quote: “You don’t expect a sunset to admire you back.“ And how I can so very easily apply it to Destiel and it works both ways. 

For Cas: Dean is the sun. He is the reason the world spins and there is warmth in the galaxy. He is pure and bright. He is who Cas fights for and who he will always protect because without him there is no reason to live. And Cas thinks a man like Dean would not spare him the time because he is too busy keeping the world alive.  

For Dean: Cas is something untouchable. Something he can’t begin to comprehend or understand. He is an angel of the fucking lord. And how can something so beautiful and transcendent, something so far away that it seems impossible that it could exist, look at one human on the planet that an angel lights up. 

And how wrong they were to think the other was out of reach.

when you've always secretly thought of yourself as some kind of monster and then you start to become one and you believe, like you always have, that everyone will leave you but then your angel reaches for your shoulder and reminds you that you are worth saving, always, and that he will never leave you, no matter what.

1x06 / 10x22

dean and his cute freckles for @feeddoughnut ♡

Mark Sheppard does not carry around a 13 year old photo of him kissing Jim Beaver for y’all to forget about his little gay character

jack’s speech to sam in 13x01 lost and found

[ID: jack’s speech to sam in 13x01 over screenshots of supernatural / “I don’t…I have to find my father” as jack realizing that cas is MIA in spn 15x18 / “He’ll protect me” as cas shields jack from dean in spn 14x20 / sam saying “jack, you gotta listen to me. that’s not really something lucifer does” as lucifer attacks jack in spn 13x23 / “lucifer? no that’s not his name” as jack is excited to be visited by castiel in his dream in spn 13x14 / “my father is castiel” as cas and jack are reunited in spn 15x11 / “my mother, she said castiel would keep me safe” after cas makes the deal to save jack in spn 14x08 / “she said the world was a dangerous place” as jack looks at the remnants of the exploded church in spn 13x20 / “that’s why I couldn’t be a baby or a child” as jack saves his family from au!michael in spn 14x14 / “that’s why I had to grow up fast” after jack dies to spn 14x20 / “that’s why I chose him to be my father” as cas tells jack he’s proud of him in spn 14x02 / “where is he?” as jack asks where’s cas in spn 15x19 / end ID]

dean would call both cas and jack ‘baby’ but with different contexts. and sometimes dean walks in saying, “where’s my baby?” and cas has no idea if dean is referring to him or to their 2-year-old son so instead he just picks jack up and walks over to dean and says, “here we are” and dean kisses jack on the forehead and pulls cas in for a kiss on the lips and he happily hums, “my baby and my baby”

since ppl liked this one

here’s cas and dean facetiming other members of their found family:

them facetiming their son, who’s hanging in his God palace

dean showing off his wedding ring to his one and only dad :) <3

cas showing how hip he is with the technology (and claire being sweet and acting like she’s proud of him)

garth making a joke about dean suddenly being “cuddly”

and them wearing the matching sweaters that jody and donna gave them as a wedding gift

#dean and cas are basically just a married couple with 2 teenage kids

1 year after Cas’s confession Dean is still a little clingy

☆ john winchester's journal | 1x12 - faith | 4x01 - lazarus rising | 12x19 - the future | 5x04 - the end | 6x20 - the man who would be king | john winchester's journal | 12x02 - mamma mia | john winchester's journal | 2x04 - children shouldn't play with dead things | john winchester's journal (x3) | 2x20 - what is and should never be | 6x20 - the man who would be king | supernatural season 5 disc 6 special feature commentary

its cas going from:

to:

and its dean going from:

to:

Nah, because they didn't even introduce Abel, THE Abel, but they created a completely new character, Colette, the love of Cain's life and then paralleled her with Cas.

when spn shows the “HELL IS REAL” side of America 👌🔥

The digital remastered versions' greatest sin is that the new aspect ratio cuts off the shot of their hands halfway and you can’t fully see him literally CRADLING her injured hands. So here you go. Brb going to stare at this forever.

dean being an annoying film bro is something that can be so personal

I lay down with a man, Lord. I lay down with the Devil. And he has put his roots in me.

+ bonus Midam :)

(Shoutout to @bloodydeanwinchester​ for inspiring this, although I’m 75% sure this has been done before 😅 ID under the readmore!)

Keep reading

castiel’s greatest hits + text posts (2/?)

January 24th, 1979 ♚ Happy Birthday Dean!

it's 0:03 on the 24th of january, 2003 and dean is 24 years old. he's lonely and scared and his dad hasn't seen him in person in over nine months. he doesn't really know what to do. he wanders the continent waiting for his father to text him the details of a hunt (john doesn't even bother calling anymore) and when he does, dean goes. he finds something to put his fist through. finds somewhere to kill his liver. finds someone to keep him warm at night. it's all very tideous and empty and he doesn't know how long he's supposed to sustain himself like this.

dean's 24, and his dad doesn't call on his birthday. his brother doesn't either. there was a time when sam would pretend to be asleep, but he'd really be hiding under the covers with candy he bought with change he'd pilfered (badly) from dean's pockets, waiting for the clock to strike midnight so he could "surprise" dean. but that was when dean was 8, 10, 12. dean's 24 now, and his brother doesn't give a shit.

the world feels like it's moving fast when you're 24. you think you've seen all you can already, think you've met everyone you're ever going to meet. wherever you are, whatever you're doing, it feels like that's all there is. forever.

dean's 24, and he's shit faced in a podunk town somewhere in middle america with six bucks to his name and a colt under his jacket.

it's a bleak fucking forever, and he isn't sure what he's supposed to do about it. there's that feeling in his chest like some sonofabitch has its claws stuck in there. he can't breathe. he can't think. he's scared, kind of, but he doesn't even know what he's scared of.

it's a shitty fucking feeling.

dean's 24, and he really, really just wants his mom. his family. he wants a degree, and he wants to see the proud smile on mary's face — lined, it would be lined, because dean's 24 now — when she hangs it up in the foyer. he wants —

well. whatever. it doesn't matter. dean's 24. and alone. and he thinks that's all he's ever going to be.

but dean's only 24, and there's a lot he doesn't know.

~

it's 00:03 on the 24th of january, 2023 and dean winchester is 44 years old.

he's putting on a show of being annoyed at being woken up at midnight, grumbling and grouching, but really, he's preening under all the attention.

his house — and he has a house — is a mess. he's been corralled onto the couch by jody's girls who crowd around him as he waits for the birthday cake — or pie, he isn't sure yet — to arrive. they joke over his head like he there isn't six feet and change of person between them, and it makes him want to smile.

dean's 44, and his life is slow, and quiet. there's a ring on his left hand and no gun under his pillow. the only time he wields a knife these days is when he's cooking for his family. his hair is more salt than it is pepper, and his knees hurt when he bends them. he's got glasses and hearing aids and he's traded in his heeled boots for orthopedic shoes.

all this is not forever, not really, but he likes whatever it is. there's this feeling in his chest, like maybe an angel's pressed a palm to it and is blessing him. like sunshine. or a good meal. or the sound of his family being dorky in the room over. he's happy, is the thing. he's so damn happy.

dean's 44. he's got an angel for a husband and a band of almost-kids he loves so much he doesn't know what to do with it. his mother's here, too. his mother's here. her face is lined— just like his, because dean's 44 now — and when she smiles, it feels like the world is sighing. like it'll be okay.

it's a good feeling.

it's the 24th of january, 2023, and it is a birthday pie. there's a candle that he blows, and the noise following that is loud enough that he almost worries about the neighbours.

"happy birthday, dean!" they all say — mother, brother, son, husband, and the girls. his family.

cas— his cas, who's here, he's here—holds dean's face in his hands, kisses his forehead.

"i love you," he says. "you, too. always," dean replies.

dean's 44, and his life is good. it's more than good. there's so much he doesn't know, but he's not too worried about all that, because he's not alone.

life happens. they'll deal.