Poseidon, Eating A Jar Of Nutella At 3 Am, Crying, After Starting 53 Arguments That Very Day: Why Can't

hades: who's a good demonic guardian of hell? WHO'S a good demonic guardian of hell?

cerberus: ???????????????

hades: you are!

cerberus: !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

roger : if the earth is flat, then explain why my life has been going downhill constantly.

⠀⠀ ⠀⠀ ⠀⠀ ⠀⠀

brian : no that’s not-

roger : i need your help. you’re sneakier than me, you’re a better liar than me and you have no moral compass.

⠀⠀ ⠀⠀ ⠀⠀ ⠀⠀

freddie : look, those are nice compliments, but i’m busy.

Dionysus: How do I get Ceberus from licking me? I’m scared he’ll get drunk off my sweat

Underworld social networks

Hades: tumblr. Never reblogs anything, but follows a lot of science blogs and entertains himself thinking how smart he is. His nickname is Hector.

Lucifer: Twitter. Strictly professional, only uses it for official communication.

Charon: goodreads. He doesn't really use it as a social network, but he needs to keep track of the books he has read.

Cerberus: no social network. (But there's a user in some porn webs called @BadassGuardian that just happens to like the same things as him).

Cain: he is that one troll in every social network ever. He also happens to follow a lot of fashion channels both in YouTube and instagram

Abel: he's that one guy who never logs off Steam.

Ambrosius: YouTube. He follows dance channels and tries to copy the choregrafies.

Akin: tumblr. He's in every Fandom. OTPs, shipping, crying when one of his OTPs becomes Canon... he is the ultimate fanboy.

Lea: instagram. Fashion, weapons and videos of herself training (and looking fabulous while doing it).

Apollo: [to Hades and Cerberus] Alright, Shaggy and Scooby, you take the sinks, I’ll check the cabinets, and, Velma, you get the spooky-looking fridge.

Athena: What?! Why do I get this...dubious-looking device?

Apollo: Because only Velma would say ‘dubious device.’ Velma gets the spooky fridge.

Hades: Who does that make you, Apollo? Fred?

Apollo: Bitch, I’m Daphne.

John: I’ve been dropping him the most insanely obvious hints for like a year now. No response.

Brian: Wow. He sounds stupid.

John: But he’s not. He is really smart actually. Just dense.

Brian: Maybe you need to be more obvious? Like, I don’t know… “Hey! I like you!”

John: I guess you’re right…

John: Hey, Brian! I like you.

Brian: See? Just say that!

John: You can’t be fucking serious?

Brian: If that flies over his head then, sorry Deaky, but he is too dumb for you.

John: ...

my fashion icon

Dionysus: when was the last time you got laid?

Hermes: when was the last time you came home sober?

Dionysus: touché