Ftm Passing Tips !!

everybody loves stabbing as a sign of homoerotic longing. but when I, Brutus,

My doctor says all the black mold in my body came from a single expired gram cracker which i just think is fascinating

People were strange like that. Steal five dollars and you were a petty thief. Steal thousands of dollars and you were either a government or a hero.

Terry Pratchett, Going Postal

one must imagine tantalus hungry

what's your name? (rhetorical) (because i will forget immediately)

Odysseus' Strategy Notebook

PLAN TO DEFEAT THE TROJANS

Build giant wooden horse and hide inside it

PLAN TO DEFEAT THE CYCLOPS

Build giant wooden horse spear and hide inside it stab the cyclops with it

PLAN TO ESCAPE THE CYCLOPS' CAVE

Build giant wooden horse and hide inside it

Build giant wooden SHEEP and hide inside it

Build a bunch of normal-sized sheep and hide in those

Skin real sheep and use them to make incredibly realistic sheep costumes

Ride the sheep out of the cave but upside-down so he doesn't find us

PLAN TO DEFEAT THE LASTER LAESYTR LESTRYG CANNIBAL GIANTS

Build giant wooden horse and hide inside it

Build giant wooden cannibal giant and hide inside it

Build giant wooden RUN

PLAN TO DEFEAT THE WITCH

Build giant wooden horse and hide inside it

Build giant wooden pig and hide inside it?

Build giant wooden d go with Hermes' plan

PLAN TO DEFEAT SCYLLA

Build giant wooden horse and hide inside it

Build wooden decoy sailors and hope she eats those DID NOT WORK

PLAN TO STOP MEN FROM EATING SACRED CATTLE

Build giant wooden horse and hide inside it

Build giant wooden cow and trick the men into eating it

Take a nap and come up with a better plan

PLAN TO ESCAPE CALYPSO'S ISLAND

Build giant wooden horse and hide inside it

Build wooden decoy statue of me and put it in her bed

Build giant wooden d

PLAN TO KEEP ODYSSEUS HERE FOREVER

Steal strategy notebook

Check for splinters just in case

PLAN TO SNEAK BACK INTO THE PALACE

Build giant wooden h

Disguise self as giant wooden beggar normal old beggar OKAY I GET IT NOT EVERYTHING HAS TO BE A GIGANTIC WOODEN REPLICA I GET IT ALREADY sheesh Athena

GET THE SUITORS OFF MY BACK, PLAN B (THANKS A LOT MELANTHO)

Announce that I will marry whoever can string my husband's bow and shoot through wait this isn't my notebook

PLAN TO KILL THE SUITORS wait who scribbled in my notebook

Thought I'd make a post introducing who I am >-< !!!

Name: Brutus!!

Pronouns: he/him (and in the process of making caesar's was/were)

likes: Democracy, my besties at the senate, the 15th of march, my uncle quintus

dislikes: caesar.

Taken 💞 (ily Cassius)

Julius Caesar: When I said I wanted to be repeatedly penetrated by at least two dozen men wearing nothing but togas this WASN'T what I meant

god I would be UNSTOPPABLE if I was capable of consistently initiating tasks. just you wait. you'll be waiting a while but just you wait

The Aeneid is so annoying to read because it's going along going along it's a masterpiece it's a work of art "AND NOW A WORD FROM OUR SPONSOR AUGUSTUS"