First Vent Post/introduction I Guess?

if it helps, my shoulder blades hurt like shit. the wings get so heavy with guilt, they really do.

what do you do when they wont go away? they've never lasted this long or hurt this bad...

I regret every second of it and I would never treat anyone like that again.

I've learned from my mistake, I promise I have.

You don't have to believe me.

oh right i forgot to update.

My friend convinced me to eat tonight so I ate like 2 servings of dinner and i think i'll wake up early so i can eat tomorrow properly

I think I'll bring some snacks too because I don't want anyone trying to give me food...

shoutout to my friend for convincing me to eat btw. he's a real one.

What have I done?

This isn’t how I imagined it

I don’t blame you

Why are you blaming yourself?

It’s going to be okay.

You’re going to be okay

If you’re okay I’ll be okay

Everything is going to be okay

no matter how bad i mess up, i always end up the little bundle of sadness curled up under someone's wing.

yeah im a jirai, the ladies (and gentlemen) call me the bomb 😔

you're a real fuckin jirai boy, aren't you

I made progress and growth today.

If you'd like to hear.

I made up with someone I've been upset with. I finally apologized to him and his friends.

They were happy that I was back.

I fixed that. I repaired my relationship there.

I really did.

I didn't do it to make them feel better this time.

I made a choice for myself finally, and it didn't end up hurting anyone.

I won't even be hurt by letting him back into my life. He's a good person.

tell her to fuck off and block her.

if she goes to your school try your best to ignore her.

stay safe

thanks. I'll do that. I'll make sure she knows im not interested and then block her.

Thank you, as usual.

"...You're strong. I know you are..."

What an oddly familiar phrase. What an odd thing to tell me.

Thank you, Opal. I'm glad I stopped you back then.

I hope Ch lives.

someday, everything is going to turn out okay. you'll wake up with no blisters, no bruises, no scratches. you'll go about your day like normal, surrounded by people who care for you. you'll laugh and joke with them like you always have, and it will be easy to forget the hard times you had before.

it's all going to be okay.

stay safe.

thank you so much. there's so much going on that i don't even put in my blog but words like these make me feel cared about. I know there are people supporting me out there more then ever right now. Thank you for your kind words.