Alias Talks - Blog Posts

Me, walking to school:

My headphones: **Red Signal by The Mechanisms**

Me, still walking, unfazed: Oh well, why not? It's 7:33 in the morning, a good time for an Eldritch Invocation. :D

I have to admit, even if

One; Simon Fairchild is my favourite of the Old Eldritch Horror Man Trio

And two; I'd probably be an avatar of the Vast and at the end of the day I'd be treated just the same;

I almost laughed through the tears when I learned that he got fucking kneecapped by an angry mob.

How am I feeling after the TMA finale?

I'm at my third? Fifth? (I actually lost count) Ricky Montgomery song, and I'm pretty sure this playlist will follow this up with some good old:

Achilles Come Down by Gang of Youths

Ship in a Bottle by fin

Liar by The Arcadian Wild

Stray Italian Greyhound by Vienna Teng

As the World Caves In and Less and Less by Matt Maltese

A couple of dodie songs

A pinch of Lincoln

A handful of Mother Mother

Basically the entirety of Mitski's discography

I'm doing great.

I might need a few more tissues by the end of the night.

Other than that, I'm great.

It is Wednesday, my TMA dudes...

AHHHHHHH-

This has been probably done before...but:

Martin Killbill Blackwood

Don't fucking smirk at me, Archivist.

I'm suffering and you're smirking.

I'm this close to crying and you're smirking.

I get a heart attack every time you go for a smoke break, and you're smirking at a reference from the first statement.

Jonny Sims. I feel attacked.

So... How do I feel about Jonathan Sims trying to clear Elias Bouchard's name because he did nothing wrong other than smoke weed, have a very weird job interview and become the recipient for that pompous voyeur that goes by the name Jonah Magnus?

*crying* G-Good. I'm not having feelings for the bastard man, you are. Shut up.

And I know it could've just been Jon trying to just go all: "That is not correct. Because according to the encyclopedia of 👁️✨"

But let me just i m a g i n e.

So...I got a theory, that like any other theory, sprouted awfully, like a flesh flower in Jared Hopworth's garden:

Am I the only one that has the awful feeling that something like this is gonna happen: So, hypothetically...

Imagine Georgie and Melanie being in the middle of an orde of Archivists Monsters, or just in a dangerous situation in general, and Melanie gets hurt, or is close to dying, and like that... Georgie feels fear again.

Suddently she fears Melanie dying and her not being able to save her.

And by feeling fear she inevitably succumbs to whatever fear domain suits her best.

(Which is probably gonna be the End, because she'll fear Melanie's life ending? Maybe?)

Then imagine Melanie surviving whatever scared Georgie, aand while she hears the sounds of her beloved succumb to whatever horror awaits her, not able to do anything, she can't help but think its because of her.

Or even worse, not realizing at all and just calling out her name hopelessly....Feeling angrier and angrier at each and every monster, person or fear that took her away, but in the end, blaming herself because she wasn't able to do anything.

No? Just me? Okay, I'll go back to my corner.

The Magnus Archives got me feeling again

I teared up more than once just thinking about:

1. The Podcast ending

2. The cast being unhappy in general

3. JON AND MARTIN ARGUING (because one loves the other too much and the other does too but he's "noT GonNa DoOm tHE WoRld ovER It")

4. Yeah, Jon, in season 1 you really were a fucking dick, UH? OH! What's that? The sound of all of those mutual pining fanfictions that I wrote in my head just shattering??? Oh, cool.

5. "And I'm glad you've got him"

6. "Can I have a cigarette?" AND JON FUCKEN LAUGHING. UGH, GOD, SIMS, DON'T GO ALL "Oh, hey, remember that?" I OBVIOUSLY REMEMBER, I'VE BEEN HYPERFIXATING ABOUT Y'ALL FOR THE LAST MONTH.

7. The fact that I love Basira so much.

8. Jon feeling so guilty that he felt the need to try clear Elias's name.

9. ThE oMiNoUs fUcKInG tHiNG aBOUt tHe lIGhtER.... I dOn'T kNoW whAT iT is yEt bUt I jUsT kNoW tHaT i'M gOiNG tO cRy beCAuSe oF iT.

10. And the horrifying theories that sprouted in my head like the flowers in Jared's flesh garden.

"I do! It's me! I'm listening! And a hefty bunch of other people around the world-"

Me: Had a long week, I'm now rewarding myself with more emotional turmoil.

Me: Let's go The Magnus Archives, a podcast distributed by Rusty Quill-

I am not here to comment on the extremely cool new statement.

I am not here to tell how much I hate when y'all theorists are right (yes, I'm talking about "A Guest for Mr. Spider)

I am here to EXPRESS MY JOY IN FRONT OF THE NEW "I lost my boyfriend/girlfriend" FRIENDSHIP THAT'S BLOOMING BETWEEN JOHNATHAN AND BASIRA.

Dear Annabelle Cane;

Annabelle "Avatar of the Web" Cane. I'm very gay for you, you and your adorable lisp.

But.

Even if I personally think I would be an avatar of the Vast, and I am in no way, shape or form a suitable avatar of the Slaughter or Desolation... I will burn you if you do something to Martin.

Yeah. I liked the setting of Hill Top Road...

DOESN'T MEAN I WANTED TO COME BACK TO IT-

Just listened to episode 193 and I want to die; is it safe to say that:

"Spoiler! It's only gonna get worse from here!"

So, I'm very dumb. And I just realized that in episode 159...

Peter Lukas fuckin' died

In my defense... I honestly thought he wanted to fuck off to another corner of the Lonely.

Getting myself killed? Or worse...

Expelled?

Salesa, I didn't think you'd be the one to make Harry Potter references-

Oh...SO WAS NO ONE GONNA TELL ME THAT ANNABELLE CANE HAD A LISP?

That's not healthy for me guys, that gave me and heart attack, I love her so much-

Is it possible that all of the funniest quotes from the podcast are characters blatantly refusing to obey the poor archivist?

First Michael hitting Jonathan with the:

"LET HER GO!"

"...No???"

I can just imagine Michael adding a good: "Why the fuck would I do that, Archivist? :)"

Then Salesa giving Johnathan a taste of mortality after a while he kept using his newfound powers????

Amaizing, 10/10 (I'm going to admit that all was made a 200% better with Martin's little snort while laughing)

So, um,,,

Was no one gonna tell me that Salesa has a voice THAT beautiful? No wonder this man's had so many clients! With his voice alone he could sell me almost anything-

Welcome to episode 170: "Recollection" or, as I like to call it:

"I hate the Lonely and what it does to Martin."

Or even better:

"Peter Lukas get out of your little hiding place and you'll see, NOT YOUR FUCKING FOG, but ME BECAUSE I'M COMING FOR YOU-"

I was talking to a friend about Peter Lukas and Elias Bouchard, and after telling them about how they're normally drawn (Elias as an older twink and Peter as a beefy boi) they said:

"Ohhh nooo... I wonder who's the bottom..."

I've been laughing at their pure and sheer sarcasm ever since.

Valentine's Day's approaching and I'm no closer to finding love:

But whatever it is, I hope it's going to be like whatever Jonathan Sims and Martin Blackwood have going on.

(Before any of you say it: No, I don't mean the apocalypse.)

Local dumbass just started Season 5: "The birthday scene wrecked me."

You know what I'm going to say...

"APOLOGIES FOR THE DECEPTION"?! REALLY?!

You have to do a lot more for me to accept the apology, Jonah.

I'm listening to episode 159.

As you may be expecting, I am going to ignore all of the shit that has been happening out of The Lonely.

Am I freaking out about Basira and Daisy? God, if someone hurt the two lesbians I would destroy them and then myself.

Am I shocked about Elias' bullshit? Yes, I may spend the rest of the afternoon posting about the fucker.

Am I emotionally ready for the last episode of the season? Absolutely fucking not.

But, hear me out...

*on the verge of tears* t-they said they love each other.

Gotta love the duality of Peter Lukas!

One second he's being all funny;

And the other he brings me an ungodly amount of unbridled rage

If you've seen the finale of season four, you know what I'm talking about.

I swear to fuck if he, all this time, has been working with Elias to "UnLeASh tHE aRcHIviST's tRue PoWeR" I will wreak havoc.

I know this is just me wishing stuff, but, hear me out:

Does this aufully sound like a marriage proposal, or is it just me?

Me, desperate, listening to episode 154: "Come on, I love them so much, why do they have to suffer like this?!"

Me: "Let them go!"

Me: "Let Jonathan go, Ceaceless Watcher!"

Me: "Oh almighty Lonely, leave Martin be!"

Me, realizing: "..."

Me: "..."

Me: "I may want to rephrase that one."

EpISOdE 154 dEsTRoYed mY pOoR JOnMaRTin HeART

Stop doing this to me, boys. Please, I beg you, oh eldritch entities, let them be happy.