Chaoticnightmarekitty - Vent Rant Blog Yippie

Honestly my only purpose is spending money and being cute ^_^ I won't even be a good housewife... Just internet princess (⁠｡⁠ŏ⁠﹏⁠ŏ⁠)

how it feels to spam my mutuals

touch-starvation needs to be written with emphasis on the starving part. you are hungry to be touched. so hungry that even the very taste of it makes you nauseous. it has been long since anything has ever touched you, ever fed you - that your body has grown more used to that gnawing emptiness more than anything else. it's better for you to be held, to eat but it makes you sick to try. you know

Jirai/Menhera/Girly songs for my mentally ill bitches part 1/2

YouTube

♡Music for the mentally ill♡

If you feel sad at least you have this playlist

Link^^^

" hmmm i wonder why im always poor "

*spends money whenever i feel upset*

*spends money whenever i feel upset*

*spends money whenever i feel upset*

*spends money whenever i feel upset*

*spends money whe

i’m so jealous of passionate ppl.

like, there’s smth u wanna achieve in life? you don’t just feel as if you’re wasting away your time, as if you’re a dull background character meant to make the talented ones shine even brighter?

bc i wish i had that. i wish i had a goal that i wanted to strive towards. i wish that there was smth that genuinely interested me, rather than just seeing it as a good pastime. i wish that i didn’t feel the need to go to extreme lengths just to feel like an adequate person, rather than just being a prop meant to fill in the background.

me when I soooo don't have anxiety :P

I always love it when someone starts off their trauma dump like this. It's so fucking funny.

✨️Wooo humor as a coping mechanism ✨️

Well, actually funny story!

(Proceeds to tell you the most wild, traumatizing, sad and tragic story you ever heard)

For many years of longing, I craved attention from my favorite people. To be loved, to be looked at, to be the only thing in their mind.

I would obsess over them day and night. Where my life was bleak and boring without any interaction with them. I'd get depressed and hopeless without their attention, imagining hurtful scenarios of them leaving, and remembering that these feelings of mine will forever be within me. They will never know. I will not let them know. No matter how much I like them this feeling.

At the same time, I hate it with a passion. I do not like feeling like I have no control. So I do what's best. I ghost everything just because of one person. I leave. But I always come back pathetically yearning for their attention again. Because I can't stand being alone.

You know what's funny though? I met someone... who for the first time reciprocated my feelings without me having to say anything.

I was scared. I was so scared.

I've always been an obsessive person to those I liked. So why... did I hate it the moment they liked me back?

Did i even like them? If not, then does that mean i didn't actually like the previous people before?

Did i simply make up an image of them?

Or is it that I just don't like him? And maybe that's why I didn't like his confession.

I feel gross. I hate that I rejected him and I went back to using him as fuel for my sick fantasies. I hate that I still want his attention.

I hate looking at blogs that have romantic shit that says cheesy things like "what I crave for him to do."

I hate it

I no longer look at men with such rose-tinted glasses anymore. I feel empty. I feel repulsed.

I feel nothing at all.