Latest Posts by crazzyyyramblings - Page 3

I think it’s really unfair that I (a person who needs to feel loved all the time) am so incredibly hard to love.

Things I'm good at :

• ??????????

• ???????

•????

• ???????

• feeling like a burden and bed rotting

"You’re so polite" thanks i was raised in constant fear of upsetting people.

feeling unwanted ruins my whole fucking day

watching another person with bpd also lose themselves to limerence..

i wish i could feel alive by myself

love getting ghosted 🤗🤗🤗

spam

trying not to get attached

i wait for you

sometimes life feels just terrible and that's how I am tried to get over it today

having BPD n DPD is rough..

hate spiral - HoneyLily

I wish

Or maybe home is just two arms wrapped around you when you're at your worst.

i need constant reassurance bc my brain makes me feel unlovable & i see things in black and white so if i feel the vibe change or if plans change i start spiraling thinking. it's hard for me to think anyone loves or cares for me the same way i care for them unless they are borderline obsessed or show it consistently bc of my lack emotional permanence. the moment i feel even SLIGHTLY rejected or ignored at all i spiral and i will be the meanest person ever about it.

i am excessive when i love someone and i am cruel when i hate someone. i want to be gentle. i don't want to be this way.

i crave being someone’s first choice so bad. why does no one ever choose me over others?

omg maybe life is worth living [i had a decent day] —> i cannot be saved [the slightest inconvenience occurs] —> i am a fucking god and everyone loves me [someone laughed at my joke] —> i am going to kill myself [i feel a little bit unwanted because of someone’s reaction]

and this shit just goes on and on and NEVER stops

i think I bother everyone by being alive

this text message has made me think of scollace since the first time i saw it so

scoliosis

Memories Made In Moonlight

Watercolor on Black Cotton Paper

2024, 9"x 12"

Blue Forget Me Nots

Private Collection

Starry Eyed

Watercolor on Black Cotton Paper

2024, 22"x 30"

Myosotis, Forget Me Nots

Do forgotten things belong in dreams?

Surely, even the nights that slip away from the mind still yet cling to being.

Why else do we dream of both the most beautiful and the wondrous things?

What was left by another can mean everything to someone new.

Remember that you do not have to honor your father.

Remember that if your father did not treat you with respect, then he does not deserve your respect.

Remember that you deserve a father who loves you, and it is neither your fault nor your shame if you don't have one.

I don't feel like I exist in reality if no one notices me. But relying on people's approval is never a good idea.

having bpd and also being a people pleaser is so weird because i will hate someone when they’re not with me and swear i’ll ignore them, and then 15 minutes later i’ll pick up their call and spend the next five hours with them