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Bob - Blog Posts
That can: it’s peaches
Weekend pass: revoked
The dog: it’s mine
Brass knuckles: could use some
Got: a penny
I made this at 2 am after scrolling through TikTok. (And i love Nix but it’s very in character of him to say “im trash”)
Luz: What if you eat an apple a day?
Doc Roe:
Babe: You just blew my mind.
A puppy really
Lipton: Shifty, we have to talk.
Shifty: Yes, Seargent?
Lipton: Stop collecting frogs and hiding them in your foot locker.
Shifty: Sorry, sir its just-
Lipton: Captain Sobel might knock it over and hurt them, hide 'em in the showers.
Eugene Roe Cute Cajun Prince
(insp.)
Nix: Dick, I am not in denial.
Dick: Yes, you are. You're just denying you're in denial.
Nix: Dick, honey, I am not denying I'm in denial.
Dick: If you're not denying you're in denial, then you're in denial.
Nix: Look, fluffhead. Why should I deny being in denial? I never said I was in denial, YOU are the one who said I was in denial, and don't you deny it.
“I will corrupt you” squad: Luz, Liebgott, Speirs, Nixon, Heffron, Toye, Guarnere
“No, protect the innocent!” gang: Martin, Lipton, Compton, Randleman, Powers, Winters, Welsh, Malarkey
“The innocent” nest: Webster and Doc Roe
Speirs: My moral alignment is chaotic lawful.
Nixon: ...
Nixon: What the fuck is that supposed to mean?
Lipton: He has a strict moral code but nobody can figure out what the hell it is.
Nix: i'm a communist now Harry
Welsh: does that mean you're going to redistribute your wealth (to me)
Nix: i literally keep forgetting i'm rich
Easy Officers Meeting
Speirs: sorry i'm late, i didn't want to be here
Nix: wait was skipping this an option
Dick: sit down, Lew
Ronald Speirs: Holy shit, it's a piggy bank!
Liebgott: I sleep with a bat by my pillow
Luz: weak, I sleep with my rifle
Lipton: you’re both pathetic
Nixon: [not paying attention, taking a sip of coffee] tell ‘em, Lip
Liebgott: what do you sleep with?
Lipton: Speirs
Nixon: [spits out coffee]
Babe: Are you alright? You didn't sleep at all last night.
Roe: I got a solid eight minutes.
Roe: Not consecutively, but it's fine. You're not even that blurry
Nixon, at Starbucks: can I get a venti vanilla latte with uhh, seven espresso shots
Speirs, next in line: Jesus Christ just do cocaine
Lieb: Woah, Web is so pretty.
Chuck: Don’t be jealous Lieb, you’re really pretty too.
Lieb: I’m not being jealous, I’m being gay.