Tw Sa - Blog Posts

Alien Stage is clearly a metaphor for the entertainment industry (especially the idoling industry), so let's talk about it. Because I feel as if that is overshadowed in the fandom.

(A post by not only a massive alien stage fan, but a newer child actress.)

TW: SA, CHILD EXPLOITATION, TALK OF BEAUTY STANDARDS & DIET CULTURE

I've heard people talk about Alien Stage being a metaphor for the idoling industry, but no one really goes in depth that I've seen. I also have a bit of experience and have done tons of research on the entertainment industry for my own career as an actress (who's currently looking for their first acting job. No, this isn't to try to be scouted, it's just to clarify i am not super experienced-)

So here's everything I could find that parallels. I apologize for any spelling or grammatical errors, my cat is laying on my arm right now and will not move-

The treatment of the contestants by aliens in alien stage, resembles the way people treat idols in media in our reality. People fan and obsess over their stage personas, yet behind closed doors they are horribly mistreated and abused.

Trauma and tragedy is exploited. In real life, talent shows and the like will make contestants use something bad that's happened to them to gain sympathy points from the audience. In Alien Stage, do I genuinely even need to explain? That show is a massive amount of tragedy, and Mizisua was almost definitely put together in round one for a reason -- to play with the aliens' feelings.

The way aliens exploit pet humans for fame and use them, is similar to the way parents/guardians exploit their children as child actresses. Children are trained from a young age to fit this standard and be entertainment for us.

SA is extremely common in the entertainment industry. Tons of people in the industry, especially producers and directors, end up being fucking creeps who sexually abuse the people they work with. I can name a plentitude of cases. I am not a victim of this myself so I cannot speak for victims, but it is something that absolutely happens. And in Alien Stage, Luka and Till (I've also heard Ivan?) have both been implied to be sexually abused, meaning it's probably not uncommon in that world either.

Insane beauty standards. IRL as an actor, you are fatshamed, every part of your body and appearance is nitpicked, you absolutely have to fit a beauty standard. Many people are extremely insecure, plastic surgery is common too. Not to mention, diet culture runs fucking rampant. People often are put through insane and risky diets. This is especially bad in the idoling industry. Then in Alien Stage, you can probably take note of multiple characters, but I'm going to focus on Luka for this point. Luka's eating habits are canonically strictly managed, and he isn't allowed to eat much. Not to mention, Luka, and likely other characters were literally fucking BRED FOR THIS?? Like its implied they quite literally kept making him again and again until they found one that fit their standard, resulting in all his issues as well.

Dare I say no privacy. The humans in alien stage are quite literally watched by aliens 24/7, allowed no freedom or privacy. In real life, maybe it isn't exactly this for actors, but people dig into their personal lives and allow them no privacy. People doxx information and stalk actors, to the point where there's been cases of people having to move houses because of crazy fans. When people ask to stay out the spotlight, people find them anyways.

May be forgetting some stuff, but my point is that Alien Stage is a metaphor for the entertainment industry, especially the idol industry. We are the real life aliens, if you think about it.

I honestly wish people talked about it more. It's so important to the show yet I feel like it's overshadowed by the romance aspects. That or it's a lack of media literacy. I'm honestly unsure.

i can't stop thinking about how the show portraits Roman's intimacy issues in a way that feels too close to home when it comes to SA and how it affects your relationship with sex and being intimate in the future. He can only link feelings of pleasure to shame, such as when him and Tabitha try to have sex in s2e5 (you can literally see it on his face that asking her to "play dead" is something that makes him ashamed, but it's the only way he can manage to do it. If there's an element of wrongness there) or the times where he gets turned on by Gerri degrading him and can only manage to feel pleasure from it.

I haven't finished the show yet but, from what I've seen online, I believe the writers will not expand or explore that. However, I still believe his fixation with "taboo sex" (from constantly joking about it to performing) plus the issues with actually doing it and some jokes here and there about being abused as a child, is not there merely for laughs or as a proof he's "a creep or a weirdo" (plus, it's canon that Roman often says stuff that actually happened with a joke tone, so people can't tell it's real)

...or I might be projecting, idk

(also, the whole thing with Logan putting Shiv's hand under his pants due to the "confusion" morphine caused him is weird af. More people should comment on that)

It's that lurking anon again, please forgive me for this long ass thing I'm probably about to ramble on about, in advance. TW for unaliving and SA.

I loveeee your new drabbles especially the rockstar one, he's so precious. I loved pm Dazai and ADA reader as well. To be honest though, if he asked me on a date I'd fold immediately 🙃 no need to beg, buy expensive wine etc. I know technically he's supposed to be the complete opposite company of reader but I'm all for opposing sides of something falling in love, like an angel and a demon. I feel like even though Dazai is technically a good person now or at least on the good side doing good things, if it came to the person he loved to get hurt or almost die(because I refuse to even entertain the thought of this man having his heart broken again) he'd sacrifice the world for them. "A hero will sacrifice you for the world but a villain will sacrifice the world for you," and I think Dazai when it comes to his love will do the latter.

I especially love Persephone and Hades love story....minus the kidnapping. But I mean Hades loves his wife even though he's supposed to be this horrific devil because he's a God but people demonize him all the time, I see Dazai this way. I love to say he has the luck of the devil but the mind of a God. I have the biggest soft spot for people who I feel a desperate need to take care of and he's definitely one of those characters. Dazai reminds me of myself in sometimes, I've never seen value in living and have tried to not be here any longer twice, but I'm here still and I'm learning to not just exist but actually live. We aren't exactly the same but I genuinely wish I could reach the parts of his heart that he hides behind the shadows of his past. I know this is a lot for just an anime character but I can't deny he's incredibly realistic and I feel deeply for everything.

I know a lot of people don't ship him and Oda(I don't either btw) but I feel like he definitely was in love with him. I've read the manga and as much about this show as I can(I hyperfixate) and whenever it comes to them, I just see the definition of first love and "love of my life." Everything I've read with Dazai on Oda (Oda being older than him and considered him a friend, definitely not brotherly nor fatherly, I don't think Oda knew)and all the things he's done with Oda on his mind and his name in every beat of his heart, I can't deny I see true love there. I know a lot of people ship him and Chuuya(don't attack me fans of this ship please) but I'm not sure I can see him loving someone as much as Oda, after all, look at how much he's changed and done because of Oda(I don't mean he can't love anyone else, he definitely can and I hope he will but it's that eternal love he'll never forget). I know a lot of people think he's incapable of being loyal/would cheat but I think quite the opposite(because this isn't Author Osamu Dazai, this is Dazai who was inspired by two book characters, they're not the same, they have some similarity but only a few things in common), seeing how much love Dazai is capable of makes me feel like, even though he's seen as a womanizer, he has SO much love to give and he'd be so incredibly loyal to whoever captures and secures his heart. That man won't ever betray the one he loves because he's still Dazai and that person will most definitely be his lifeline, the reason he's living, his heart beats for them.

Also reading the characters he's based on makes me sad because he's based on a character that's been through so much sexual assault(both men and women took advantage of him). I feel like it could explain why Dazai is such a womanizer as well. He's not a coward for being traumatized by people in his past and yes I know we don't know if the author will bring anything up about this part of his past that relates to the characters he's based on but I can't help but wonder, you know? And as someone who has been assaulted like he has as well, I understand why he's like that, he's not purposely playing with anyone's heart(I mean the women he's with), he's protecting himself from what he's felt in his past.

Anyway I'm ending this before it gets too long even though I probably went past too long a few paragraphs ago. So sorry if this was too much or weird.

Anyway stay safe love🥺💖 I hope I didn't dump all this on you unexpectedly. I'm so sorry if you hate this or hate anything I said 😭😭

tw: mentions of sh

hope ur doing alright anon ❤️ i agree w a lot of this in terms of dazai's backstory and such ! i have to say tho i can still totally see dz cheating almost for the same reason you say you can't... like, he loves his s/o so much that he wants to drive them away so he doesn't hurt them/get them caught up w his shit, so that they don't die in his arms and he loses another person he loves, etc - what better way of getting them to leave than shattering their trust? (which is still not an excuse ofc)

i also have a hc that dazai is actually some form of asexual and doesn't actually enjoy the meaningless sex he typically has and uses it as a form of sh - like on a rough night he gets horrifically drunk and goes home with a random just because he doesn't view himself as human and wants to make himself uncomfortable. esp w how he was brought up in the pm, using his body to achieve his end goals (shown w kouyka when he says to atsushi that she'll seduce those bodyguards and then take them out, and she's 14; same w when dazai slept w that nurse to get his phone back during the cannibal arc i believe) like it's clear mori expects some pretty horrific things from his subordinates, so he's definitely used to viewing himself as less-than and viewing his body as a tool...

it's all food for thought, idk. hope you're in a better place and taking care of yourself, anon ❤️

A message for young women in these perilous times!

Just an experiment. Reblog if you actually give a fuck about male victims of domestic violence and rape.

Of fucking course

What sick bastard doesn’t

You're a 100% right. It does seem like they wanted relationship drama and picked SA before anyone could say anything else. It's framed like 'which girl will he choose' and more misery for Tory when it is a traumatic thing for him. It's disgusting.

oh oh oh i am very interested about your thoughts on age is play

Okay, let me just clarify, this is my own personal opinion. I cannot express enough that this is how I, personally, as Jess, feel on this topic because of my exposure to it and instances in my own life. Completely personal. I’m not trying to make anyone else conform to my viewpoint. I’m just saying what I personally think about it.

So all that being said, I hate it more deeply than I will ever hate any other thing ever.

I don’t have problems with non-sexual age play! I completely respect sub-space and regression and understand how it makes a person feel safe (especially when they’re regressing to the age they experienced trauma and are using this as a coping mechanism)! I don’t have any problems with a caretaker/little dynamic that is purely about taking care of the little and making them feel safe while in headspace. I respect someone’s right to regress and get away for a minute into a safer space and wanting someone there to protect them and give them the opportunity to feel small. A lot of the times, people can’t even really control that headspace.

However, I believe firmly that sexual age-play is disgusting and should in no world be normalized. It’s a direct gateway to pedophilia and no one should be glamorizing the romanticization and sexualization of children in any way. I’ll go ahead and take this opportunity to link a post that describes what I think pretty perfectly. A little is literally unable to consent to sexual acts because of the nature of their headspace and a dom should in no way be sexually attracted to child-like behavior. I don’t blame the sub in this situation like I blame the dom. No person should be getting off to children or child-like behavior. I don’t care if it’s “two consenting adults” engaging in the activity. This kind of play inherently normalizes attraction to children and child-like behavior and if a dom is sexually attracted to their little exhibiting child-like behavior, they will condition themselves to develop that same attraction to real children. If a person is reading fiction and getting off to the idea of children being molested—or having sex with someone in real life who is acting like a child and associating their arousal with child-like tendencies—this will literally definitely lead them to actual consumption of real child pornography and inappropriate interactions with kids irl. This kink actively harms real children.

So those are my thoughts!! And nothing will change them.

Yea, let me just... *goes to his bedroom to cry*

Aftermath (odypen fanfic)

TW: mentioned SA and (according to my friend) slightly (and I mean SLIGHTLY) suggestive

[I was pretty proud of this one so I wanted to share :D]

[credit to @dootznbootz for the Water Wife™ headcanon]

The palace halls were deserted this time of night. The two lovers had taken an evening stroll — more like midnight stroll — and were still drenched from the creek. It wasn’t her fault, she insisted — Odysseus started it. Had he never smugly commented about his “godlike looks,” Penelope might have not used her naiad powers and they both would probably still be dry. But no.

That lovable little bighead, she thought to herself, smiling.

“What is it?” he asked from beside her. She snapped out of her thoughts and glanced at him — then, seeing his cocky grin, looked back down. Her cheeks felt hot.

“Oh, nothing. Just thinking about how embarrassed you looked after the creek incident.”

“Did not!”

“Did too.”

“Did not!”

“Quit arguing like a child,” she chuckled.

He pretended to pout, softening his expression like a little pup as he always did to persuade her.

“Don’t make that face at me.”

His grin returned, wider this time. “Why not? Too gorgeous for you?”

She stopped walking and playfully shoved his shoulder into the nearest pillar. Before she could say anything else, he grabbed her arm and pulled her close. For a second, they stayed there, looking into each other’s eyes, barely able to breathe.

She eyed his lips. He eyed hers. She inched her face closer, almost closing the gap between them —

“Wait.”

Confused, she pulled back. “What?”

Odysseus was trembling. His breathing was shallow and uneven, his skin pale. “I just … I can’t.”

“Why not?” Penelope’s brows furrowed. “Odysseus, what’s wrong?”

He didn’t respond. His chest was heaving, his eyes flicking wildly from one spot to another — looking at everything but her. And he wouldn’t stop shaking.

“Odysseus. Ody, look at me.”

He did, but his eyes were wild.

“You can tell me if something’s bothering you. Did I do something? Say something?”

“No — no, I …” He trailed off, shaking his head.

“It’s okay, Ody. You can tell me.”

“Ca — ” his breath hitched. “Calypso,” he breathed, barely audible.

“What — ” Suddenly, Penelope understood. She’d heard that word before. Calypso wasn’t a what.

She was a who.

“Another woman?” Penelope took a step back. “Is that what this is about?”

No response. Just more ragged breathing.

“Answer me, Odysseus,” she spat angrily. “Who is this woman you slept with? Why did you choose her over me?”

His eyes widened more, suddenly flicking up to meet hers. “No! No, it’s not like that. She — ”

“What’s going on, Odysseus? What else haven’t you told me? What else are you hiding?”

“Penelope, listen — ” He paused, choking a little as tears formed in his eyes. “I tried to stop her but she — ” Suddenly, he dissolved in tears. “I’m so sorry.”

Oh.

Penelope’s heart dropped. He didn’t choose Calypso over her — no, the reality was much worse.

She stepped closer again. “Ody, it’s okay — ”

“No. No, it’s not. I’m sorry.”

Reaching out to touch his face, she repeated, “It’s okay — ”

But he jumped away from her hand like it was the point of a sword.

“Don’t touch me.”

She froze, realizing why he said that. “I’m sorry, Ody — ”

His expression softened. “No. I’m sorry. I — ” his voice caught in his throat as his eyes widened again.

“I have to go,” he said, slowly backing away.

“Odysseus — ”

“I’m so sorry.”

And he turned and sprinted away.

•••

“Odysseus? Ody, where are you? Odysseus!”

Penelope ran through the halls, almost tripping and cursing at her dress for being so long. She called her husband’s name over and over again, worry blossoming in her heart like a poisonous flower.

She checked the gardens. Nothing.

She checked the main hall. Nobody in sight.

She checked the courtyard. Completely empty.

Where was he?

Realization struck her — there was only one place left.

Panting, she knocked on the bedroom door. “Ody? Ody, it’s me, are you in there?”

No response. She was about to knock again but then —

Sniffle.

Her heart felt like it had been ripped into pieces. Just that one sound made her knees feel week. Odysseus was crying — because of her. Because she decided to do the one thing that made him uncomfortable — touch him.

Although, she thought, Odysseus had never acted like this before. If anything, they both loved curling up on that wedding bed of theirs and losing themselves in love. It made them feel … intertwined. Not just their limbs. But their hearts. Their souls. Like two olive bushes — one tame, one wild — growing from the same stem with their branches wound together so tightly that nothing, not even the wind or rain, could pass through.

Now, it felt as if someone was hacking at the wild branch with an axe, trying to cut him off from his stem and pry him away against his will. That someone was Calypso.

Or maybe — Penelope dreadfully thought — it was herself.

Either way, she could not let him feel like that any longer. She opened the door, stepping inside.

“Ody?”

Another sniffle.

She gently closed the door, then followed the sound to behind the bed. Curled up in a corner was the king of Ithaca — shaking, sobbing, choking on his breath with his head against the wall and knees tucked into his chest.

“Odysseus.”

A pained groan escaped his throat as he winced. His eyes were shut tight, his skin dripping with sweat and tears.

Her gut twisted. What was happening to him? “Odysseus. Ody, wake up. Please.”

“Enough, goddess,” he croaked quietly. “Please.”

“What — Odysseus, it’s me —”

“No!” His body twitched as if someone had sent a bolt of lightning through him. His brows furrowed in pain. “You’ve — you’ve hurt me enough. No more — no more games. Please, I beg of you.”

“Odysseus! Please! Wake up!” she cried, crouching down and desperately taking his face in her hands. She could feel tears forming in her eyes, clouding her vision. What must he have gone through to get this upset?

His eyes still squeezed shut, he jumped away from her touch. “Get away from me!” he yelled. “Please — leave me alone. Let me — let me have one peaceful night. One. Please —”

“ODYSSEUS, IT’S ME! It’s Penelope! You’re home, remember? You’re safe. Please, come back to me.” She choked, the tears flowing freely down her face now.

His eyes flew open as he jolted awake. At the sight of her, his breath hitched. “Penelope,” he whispered. “It’s you.”

She nodded, smiling through her tears. “Yes, my love. It’s me. You’re home.”

For a second, he was silent, taking in everything about her — her face, her electric blue eyes, now overflowing with tears. She held his gaze, watching him realize that this was Penelope — his loving wife. She’d never hurt him. Never.

Suddenly, he threw his arms around her, dissolving in tears again. She hugged him back, her fingers combing his sweat-soaked hair as sobs racked his body. She fought the urge to cry with him, knowing that she had to be strong for the both of them if she wanted to help him.

“It’s okay,” she whispered into his ear over and over again until he had somewhat calmed down. “You’re okay.”

He waited until the tears stopped flowing, then let go and met her gaze again. “I’m sorry.”

“No.”

“I’m sorry, Penelope.”

“No, I’m sorry. I made you uncomfortable. I won’t touch you anymore —”

“No!” he exclaimed. “No, please do.” His eyes glinted with longing. “Twenty years I have been starved of your touch. I can’t hold back any longer. I just — it’ll take some time for — for me to get used to it.”

“Take your time, my love. I’ll be right here by your side.”

He nodded, biting his lip as his eyes moistened again. Burying his face into her shoulder, he sat with her in silence.

After a moment, Penelope spoke. “If you ever want to talk about it —”

He shuddered.

“You don’t have to,” she stammered. “Talk about it, I mean. I know it’s hard. I know you’re hurt. But if you do —”

“No, I do. Just — give me a second.”

“Take your time,” she repeated.

A few seconds passed as he steadied his emotions. Separating himself from the embrace, he took a deep breath. He couldn’t meet her eyes.

“It wasn’t just Calypso. Before that … Circe.”

Oh, gods. Penelope felt dizzy.

“But at least I got something out of that. Hermes told me that for her to release my men, I — I had to allow myself into her bed. So I did, reluctantly.” His voice cracked. “It worked. She released my men and sent us on our way to the Underworld. I thought that would be the last of it.”

Penelope started to take his hand in hers, then stopped herself. But Odysseus looked down, then took her hand instead. She smiled at him comfortingly.

“Calypso was a different story.” He swallowed. “After my ship was struck down by Zeus, I washed up on an island. She greeted me, appearing kind at first. She gave me shelter, food, clothing, and company. One day, I told her that I must be on my way. But she —” He hesitated. “She had different plans. ‘I gave you everything I could. It’s time you repay me.’ I agreed. ‘Anything, goddess.’” He paused. “I wish I had known what she had meant.” His voice cracked again as he finally met Penelope’s eyes. “I’m so sorry, my love.”

She shook her head.

“I'm just a man, Penelope. A mortal. I was no match against this goddess. I’m so sorry. Every night, no matter how hard I resisted, she’d — she'd force me into her bed; every night after … her, I’d lie awake thinking of you — of how I betrayed you, even when you were waiting for me for all these years —” He choked, letting out another sob.

She wrapped her arms around him again as he whispered, “I’m sorry.”

“No, don’t be.”

“I’m so sorry.”

“Don’t, Ody.”

Silence fell again between the two as he composed himself. Penelope spoke again — “This happened … every night?” she whispered.

He slowly nodded into her shoulder.

“For how long?”

No response.

“Ody —”

“Eight years.”

Gods.

Now tears fell from her eyes too as his fingers dug into her back, desperately grasping for her affection. The realization that this — being forced to betray his beloved; not the monsters, the gods, or anything else he faced — was the worst he could have ever suffered.

For eight years. Penelope felt sick.

“I’m so sorry,” he kept saying, but she only shook her head.

Her heart shattered. None of this was his fault; why was he apologizing? And this was nothing like the Odysseus she knew. Odysseus was a hero — strong, brave, and cunning. No, this was … broken. A man who had been through far more than he let on; far more than he deserved.

Even heroes need to be consoled sometimes, she figured.

They sat like that for a while, taking comfort in each other. When they finally parted, they both felt different — healed.

All that was in the past now. They had each other now, as they always would. They were safe. They were home.

They were together. And that’s what mattered.

“Penelope?” Odysseus asked.

“Hm?”

“Thank you.”

She only smiled.

That night, the two of them fell asleep in each other’s arms — the two olive bushes, intertwined again at last.

Never to be separated again.

(tw for sa mention)

so it's 3 am and maybe i'm thinking too deeply into this but uh. i feel like i've seen very little content about how genuinely horrific vlad's cloning attempts of danny are? maybe it's just me but it's always read a little bit like an allegory for sa. ik it's mostly looked at through the halfway-unserious cartoon lens but like. i remember being physically nauseous the first time i saw the ep, even though i knew through the phandom pipeline that it happened.

the way danny is kidnapped, restrained, and repeatedly tortured/forced into transforming by an adult "family friend", the way he can't tell his parents what happened because vlad is effectively blackmailing him with his secret/they wouldn't believe him, the way jack is absolutely convinced vlad is incapable of any harm because he's a "good friend" even though his WIFE knows and explicitly calls him a creep. the fact that dani remains as a completely innocent yet permanent reminder of what happened just makes it worse imo.

please don't get me wrong, i love dani and all of the content about her grappling with her identity as a clone, but it's never sat right with me that i don't see just as much about how terrifying and deeply violating it must have been for danny, and how it must have affected his own sense of identity. maybe i'm just not on the right side of phandom tumblr for that though

nah i have scrupulosity ocd and jerking it to fic of toddlers getting raped is wrong end of. get help <3

Sorry to anyone who reads this ask, I will have it tagged. First of all I don't read fics like that, but is it of a FICTIONAL character? Then there is no issue. I'm extremely uncomfortable at the idea of a toddler aged character in a situation like that but I won't harass someone or say it shouldn't exist if it is STRICTLY FICTION. Also I think you lot forget that fictional characters don't look like, and sometimes, don't act like, real people. They are drawn in proportions that would look arguably horrifying if directly translated to real life. They aren't real, nor are they breathing or capable of feeling real pain. They are, essentially, the pixelated equivalent of dolls. Any fictional character can be put into any situation at any age, anytime, anywhere, and it would not cause harm to a real person because that character does not exist. You have to be able to learn to distinguish a real person from a fictional character, they are not comparable to each other. Also, get help right? Whether you believe it or not darkshipping is approved by a lot of therapists as a healthy coping mechanism. If your therapist tells you it isn't good for you to do/utilize, it's because they recognize that those fictional concepts cause you some form of discomfort. They will form their therapy plans around YOUR needs, so everyone will have different coping mechanisms. It not being the best outlet for you doesn't mean it isn't a good outlet for someone else. Alternatively, darkshipping doesn't need to be confined to "it's only acceptable if its for coping", it's fine to like dark content in general. If it wasn't fine, you guys wouldn't freely enjoy horror movies or video games like GTA. As I've said before, if proshippers make you uncomfortable and are apart of your DNI, don't stress yourself out by interacting with me first. Have a good day/night anon

Hope yuo get raped and find yourself wiht a man who will beat you everyday you romanticize peopls trauma fucking weirdo i hate you

First of all, for those of you who didn't know, I don't ship anything besides mine and others selfships, I am just absolutely for every ship existing and being supported. Second of all any dark fictional concepts I enjoy is a reflection of my OWN trauma in some way or another and it helps me process and cope, though darkshipping is still valid even if it isn't for the sake of coping. Third of all I'm not attracted to real people like at all so getting with a man or anyone IRL is highly unlikely. Fourth of all trauma can't be gatekept, when people enjoy fictional darkships or dark scenarios I can assure you they more than likely are not sitting here like 'oh yeah this is this one persons trauma, I will incorporate it into a ship for the sole purpose of romanticizing this said persons trauma' like that just doesn't happen. Either they're coping with their OWN trauma or just find it interesting to explore in fiction. Fifth of all it's absolutely okay to hate or dislike me but interacting with me at all is breaking your own boundaries, boundaries have to be fulfilled by both parties and if you break your own boundary that isn't my fault. Sixth of all this sounds quite personal and emotional so I hope you have a good day and learn to respect your own boundaries so you don't cause yourself and anyone else any unnecessary distress. Bye now.

vent!

okay so two things here, one being that apparently on top of deporting immigrants (which is so awful) ICE is just taking random people and not returning them?? so genuinely wtf is wrong with this country, AND I never ranted abt this before but I have HORRIBLE fear of being raped, I’ve only been s’ad once and it was non consensual kissing, not as disgusting as rape but still not great, I’m convinced that’s part of the reason I have this fear and the one of the other reasons is that a few of my moms friends were drugged, raped and beaten by this one guy, their okay now but holy shit, and the fact my dad said rape isn’t as important as inflation DOESNT HELP THE MATTER, its so bad I avoid going outside and going places I’m so scared, like genuinely yall im having a panic attack no joke

cobra kai writers you are going to hell. it’s already bad enough that hayden loser ass dismissed it and said that it wasn’t sexual assault (it is)

the fact that hayden’s grown ass had to even be told what sa is, is fucking insane. that man is literally getting his ass beat on reddit, in the comments and over 200 quotes on that post on twt.

like was there little to NO communication in that writers room? like how do you unintentionally write a sexual assault scene and then gaslight fans when they’re strictly telling you that’s what it is. like you WROTE IT THAT WAYYY?!

if they wanted to make it look like robby made a mistake. why have him drunk? why was the dialogue also weird? why make robby have multiple of that rum and coke drink? why have him say he didn’t remember shit when he woke up?

just so fucking stupid bro i cant.

and there’s fucking edits of zara and robby, but losers aren’t taking is seriously and i saw this coming from a literal mile away. mind you, it’s MEN saying this. (see screenshots below)

i feel sick to my stomach. fuck every single person defending this absolute bullshit. fuck zara malik, fuck the writers.

reason 16829 why having women in the writers room or writers that have common sense and actually care about the characters need to happen on this show. i cant bruh.

edit: i’ve been informed that 3 women had wrote the script and one woman was present in directing that episode.. all i can say is what is going on. and what type of people do they have in that fucking writers room? all they all just ignorant and dumb as hell? like i have no words at this point.

I'm posting this on my less active blog for my sanity and also for maybe less attention it something idk.

Tw for sexual assault and rape.

Don't read past if those can trigger you or you just don't wanna read it. If you do thank you I think, idk how to feel about it all.

Anyways. I was raped last night but someone I consider my brother. For context I'm 17 the kid is 13-14. I won't go into detail for my own sanity but also because it's unnecessary. It happened at night, the two other kids were sleeping next to us, and I woke up to being assaulted. As the person I call mama #2 said I could have easily pushed him off or beat the fuck this kid. But I didn't. I woke up to it, which threw me very off guard. Not only that but I was molested as a child and raped 3 times before this, so I already have trauma surrounding this stuff. So when I woke I was specifically thrown back into the time I was 7. I could tell the difference between the flashbacks and what was happening but I was still paralyzed. I wanted to cry or move or tell him to leave or something but I was stuck. So yeah. I was raped. The kid didn't mean it with malicious intent, he was just curious and fucked up big time. What he did was wrong but he's still a kid. So I have chosen to let his mom (mama #2) handle it. But now I fear I have lost another group of people I loved for speaking about it. Idk. I also feel extremely guilty because I have a boyfriend. He's already told me he still loves me and everything but I can't help but feel like I did something wrong. On top of that I am responding to this trauma with intrusive sexual thoughts. I want to throw up and carve my skin off or kill myself right now. But I won't. I understand that my body is coping, like I said I've been raped 3 times before this. I just idk. I need an outlet that I know can't really effect me and Tumblr is the best place I guess. Anyways. Yeah. Support victims and stay safe.

Hypersexuals who were traumatized by one event, I love you.

Hypersexuals who were traumatized multiple times, I love you.

Hypersexuals who grew up in traumatic environments, I love you.

Hypersexuals who were traumatized at a young age, I love you.

Hypersexuals who were traumatized at an older age, I love you.

Hypersexuals who are still in traumatic situations, I love you.

Hypersexuals who said no, I love you.

Hypersexuals who "agreed to it", I love you.

Hypersexuals whose actions are greatly affected by these experiences, I love you.

Hypersexuals who cope by making jokes about their trauma, I love you.

Hypersexuals who cope by venting about their trauma, I love you.

Hypersexuals who talk with "inappropriate" language, I love you.

Hypersexuals who get uncomfortable talking with that language, I love you.

Hypersexuals who engage in risky behavior, I love you.

Hypersexuals who are scared of intimacy, I love you.

Hypersexuals who show these parts of themselves, I love you.

Hypersexuals who hide these parts of themselves, I love you.

Hypersexuals who are trying to learn healthy intimate boundaries, I love you.

Hypersexuals who struggle with intimate relationships, I love you.

Hypersexuals, I LOVE YOU!

Your experiences are valid, they'll always be valid, and they do not make you less lovable.

Stupidity

My ex was never smart

My ex was never smart. Though he might’ve stored a lot of knowledge in that greasy mess that you call a brain, he is, in fact, this stupidest man alive. Or more accurately, the stupidest boy I have ever met. He’s always called me dumb and I can admit that to some degree that is the case. I am not perfect and I certainly have some areas which only serve to be blind spots but I am not dumb. I am not always stupid. I can make stupid decisions and still be intelligent. That’s what he gets wrong.

During the long period I have known him he has always insisted that he was smart. He even implied that he was often underestimated. A typical humble brag. A narcissist. That’s what he was. And like the fool I was, I believed every word of it. I thought of him like the next Sherlock Holmes and I was Watson, watching with wide, fascinated eyes. He fed me tales of teachers, praising him or of him using his phenomenal wit. Even when I discovered his incredibly low mark in DT, he defended that it was totally intentional. He has Asperger’s, by the way. So to some creditable degree, he was quite bright. He was an expert on trains and all that he was interested in. So why do I call him stupid?

Well, if he were even remotely smarter than he insisted he was, he would’ve known that intelligence is not measured by numbers. Nor letters. He would’ve known that there are many different types of intelligence and maturity. So yes, he might’ve been academically smart, but does that ever make him emotionally smart? No. And yes, sometimes I’m oblivious to my environment and often make laughable mistakes, but did that ever undermine my emotional intelligence or maturity? Did that ever make me stupid or less capable of learning? No! And he should’ve known that.

And If he were just the little bit smart as he so adamantly tried to convince me he was, he should’ve known or at least acknowledged that he is not me. He cannot tell all the times I want to be touched. Touched on the shoulders, the neck, the waist. He should’ve realised I am just as comfortable with distance as I am with a good-old fashioned hug. He should’ve realised I was uncomfortable from the moment, I said, “I don’t think we’re ready.“ and if he were the little bit mature as he put himself to be, he wouldn’t have pushed me to have sex with him, even if he was in the mood. He shouldn’t have been blinded by his lust. He might have been older, but in that room, the very room it happened, I realised he was just a stupid boy. And I was a stupid girl to him. 

I was not shy, William. I love my body more than you say you ever will. And that was why I was trying to protect it.

I know how to communicate., William. You just don’t know how to listen.

I may lack experience, but I do not lack the knowledge of when the time is right. And that time wasn’t. 

You might deem yourself as mature, but at that very moment, you were the most childish, selfish, arrogant and ignorant human being I’ve ever met. Though I might be younger, naive and gullible, at least I know how to accept the truth. And that will make me more mature than you will ever be.

So yes, I’m disappointed to say I dated one of the most stupid people on earth. A lot of people will call me a hypocrite, but opinion is subjective isn’t it ? So he might be the most smartest person on earth in his eyes, a person beyond his generation, but to me? He is just as human as me. Just as naive, arrogant, boastful, egotistical, selfish and “dumb” as me.

This isn't my worst moment. Far from it. It's...

whadup micecleaners it sme anna

this one looks different because i painted on top of the sketch. twas fun but also scary

𝐚𝐦𝐞𝐧𝐝𝐬.

characters — yandere! suguru geto x fem! reader

𝘵𝘸 — implied 𝘳𝘢𝘱𝘦/𝘯𝘰𝘯𝘤𝘰𝘯, 𝘴/a, stalking, 𝘦𝘹𝘵𝘳𝘦𝘮𝘦 𝘺𝘢𝘯𝘥𝘦𝘳𝘦, 𝘴𝘸𝘦𝘢𝘳𝘪𝘯𝘨, 𝘴𝘭𝘪𝘨𝘩𝘵 𝘤𝘩𝘢𝘴𝘪𝘯𝘨, 𝘴𝘰𝘮𝘦 𝘳𝘦𝘭𝘪𝘨𝘪𝘰𝘶𝘴 𝘪𝘮𝘢𝘨𝘦𝘳𝘺 𝘢𝘨𝘢𝘪𝘯, 𝘮𝘦𝘯𝘵𝘪𝘰𝘯 𝘰𝘧 𝘯𝘢𝘶𝘴𝘦𝘢, 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘫𝘶𝘴𝘵 𝘪𝘯 𝘨𝘦𝘯𝘦𝘳𝘢𝘭 𝘦𝘹𝘵𝘳𝘦𝘮𝘦𝘭𝘺 𝘥𝘢𝘳𝘬 𝘤𝘰𝘯𝘵𝘦𝘯𝘵

Suguru Geto followed a strict schedule.

He would wake up in the foggy residuals of a rainy day, orange lighting of the bedroom highlighting his eyebags and scars. The familiar sting would ache for a bit, but he would quickly realize why he’d woken up in the first place, and all previous pain would leave instantaneously. 

Tugging on his yukata, the man found himself in quite the good mood. He made some toast for himself, swiftly put his shoes on, and even had half the mind to make sure his hair looked good. An exhale, and Suguru had already left the house. 

It wasn’t a long walk, but he enjoyed the scenery as he went along. Raven locks spilling down his back, he hummed a rather lively tune and made his way down the street. 

Petrichor hung in the air. The ground was wet, grass dewey as the blades danced in tandem with windy weather. He ran a hand through his hair, tongue swiping over his lips as he looked up into the sky. Despite it being morn, the moon was still out. He wondered if planets collapsed easy like humans did. If Saturn was to reduce to dust because of itself, is she not the perfect depiction of human nature? Fleeting, it was. Nothing but.

He went from humming the tune to whistling, mood only getting better and better especially now that his destination was in sight. Today was the day. He was going to make his ultimate move, an action he’d been itching to complete for months now. What a great day indeed.

Suguru’s dark clothing easily shielded him as he came up on the house, cozy as ever. He maneuvered to the backyard, finding that same spot he had the perfect view from. 

He leant back on his palms, tilting his gaze up and fully taking in the sight through the window. 

The show began.

There she was. His pupils dilated, practically forming hearts. She seemed to be making breakfast for herself, singing along to some old love song. He wondered what that voice sounded like, since everytime he tried to catch a tune— Glass stood between them. He could’ve shattered it, but that would stop the sight altogether, wouldn’t it?

His [name] was something he’d cherish for eons to come. Suguru couldn’t focus on anything else but her, the one thing that granted him some kind of mental clarity. He’d spent his whole life not getting a single thing he wanted, not knowing what or who he was— But with her? She was the only thing he wanted. 

Which led to today. 8 months, 13 days, and 15 minutes — He’d stalked her for that long, becoming ‘friends’, so it was only fair that today he actually made a move, right? Patience is a virtue not even the gods showcased, which meant he didn’t either.

God, everytime he came around he’d catch a different part of [name]’s life — Her barely clothed body, her lazy days just laying on the couch, eating a meal, or even the barely occurring sleep.

The ravenette exhaled a shaky breath, really taking in every detail about his little beloved. From the way her baggy pajama pants and oversized shirt looked on her, to the way her lips formed all the words she sang — The way her smile shone brighter than any light present, to the way her hands trembled lightly around the spatula — He was in love. 

[name] was pathetically adorable in a way he just had to protect and keep for himself. Suguru wanted her to erase all sin from his hand. He knew she could clean him completely, restore his purity— If only she would just look at him. Almost frustratedly, Geto sighed.

He didn’t have to wait anymore. Working behind the scenes and making sure that slowly, slowly, she had no one else to rely on but him — The sweet neighbor a few houses down. They were well acquainted to the point she was comfortable with him. A few nods and hums here and there to whatever he was talking about on his usual morning stroll, words exchanged over coffee she’d offered, a simple serenade in the form of their idle ‘friendship’.

Geto felt like [name] barely even glanced his way. He felt his fingers itch to pull at his hair, but decided against it. As stated before, today was the day he finally did something. Nothing was going to stop that. Not like anyone could anyway. He’d carefully cut off all her loved ones from her life, either ending their lives completely or just giving them that little— Push.

It had been a rather awful day for [name] in general. She’d just had an awful fight with someone who wouldn’t even tell her what was wrong, her trust issues were the highest they’d been in a while, and she couldn’t find her goddamn reading glasses. Fuck. 

A hissed sigh fell from her lips, eyes shutting gently as her head fell back against the bed’s headboard. It was raining outside, today was going to be cozy and she was even going to finally take care of herself— But the argument just rubbed her off the wrong way. Now her mood was sour, her head hurt, and nobody—

The doorbell rang.

[name] wasn’t expecting anyone. She stood from her bed, trepidations both muted and rising. Making her way to the front door, opening — It was safe to say she really didn’t expect who was on the other side. 

“Suguru? What are you doing here?”

“Ah–” He ran a hand through his slightly dampened locks, smiling gently. “I was taking a walk and decided to surprise you!....Were you surprised?”

The girl couldn’t help but smile too, just relieved to have some company on such a downpoured day. “Yeah—” She laughed breathily, “Yeah, I was. Come on inside.”

Suguru’s smile didn’t falter as they took a seat on the couch, and the comfortable silence that ensued felt like complete, utter heaven. [name] finally took a deep breath, and the man finally decided to speak up.

“How have you been? I’m not trying to be rude, but you seem a little more… tired, if that’s the word, today.” He placed a hand on her back, rubbing little circles in an effort to let her be at peace. 

“Oh— I’m just… Nah, I just had a pretty bad argument with my brother, if you can even call it that.” Despite her reserved choice of words, something in her eyes shone, and whether it was tears or some other unspoken agony, her trembling bottom lip gave it away. 

He hummed in response, tongue darting out to wet his lips. “Don’t feel obligated to hold back. I’m here to listen, sweetheart.” 

[name] turned her face to look at him, really look at him — And when she found not even a hint of deceit in his eyes, nor malice, the walls came tumbling down. She leant forward in her spot, putting her face in her hand and rubbing at her eyes to ease the fatigue at least a little.

“I—” Her voice cracked so she gulped heavily, “...My brother’s deciding to cut all contact with me, called me a slut and everything over text, and just hung up. Now he won’t answer my calls or texts and I don’t know why—” Her voice cracked again, echoing out into the walls. “I just don’t get it.”

The ravenette man ran his free hand through his hair, humming again. [name] found the suffocating feeling almost as a comfort, from the circles rubbed onto her back to the warmth Suguru was producing, even the tragic connotation of the day — Something had clicked back into place. What is born of the light cannot stray too far from it.

“I think it’s for the best.”

Her head shot up, eyebrows furrowed. That wasn’t what she was expecting at all.

“Ah, just let me explain,” Suguru didn’t seem the least bit bothered by her surprise, “If your brother left you high and dry for absolutely no reason, shouldn’t you do the same? Calling you a slut when you definitely aren’t, calling you an asshole for leaving him, cutting contact with you? If those aren’t extremes, I don’t know what is. And, he’s not even telling you why he did all of that. Why is it your responsibility to fix something you didn’t break, [name]?”

The girl didn’t know how to answer that. The petty respite of her own morals felt miniscule compared to the argument Suguru put forth. She watched the way his eyes flicked from her own, to her nose, and back up again. She watched the way his pupils dilated a bit, vaguely remembering what that meant, but holding no care for it.

She just wanted to absolutely melt in someone’s arms — So, she did. Without a single word exchanged, [name] wrapped her arms around the man and buried her face in the crook of his shoulder.

She missed both the blush on his face, and the bloodied phone in his pocket, belonging to her brother.

Suguru stood from his place on the grass, brushing any extra blades off his clothes before stretching his arms out. It was time. Years upon years of neglect and complete disregard of his own wellbeing had built up, he was not going to let this go now—

The man blew out a puff of air, smile creeping onto his face with the nonchalance of someone who had done this millions of times. If he was the same in every universe, a question he often pondered, did that hold any meaning to his devotion to this woman?

He approached the glass sliding doors in front of him, which were technically the backdoors of the house. He knocked rather politely to keep to his memorized script. It was time to see if [name] would play her part well too.

The girl perked up at the noise, tilting her head adorably as she paused the music and came up to open the door. “Oh! Suguru?” Her nose scrunched up confusedly, but that clueless smile did nothing to quell the immediate fluster seeping into his heart. Plus— Finally, finally, he could hear those little hums of hers. The little undertones, the way she weaved her notes only served to entice him further.

“Haha, I was just passing through and wanted to let you know that there’s a crime watch going around… I’d recommend higher security.” He offered the advice as kindly as can be, smiling still.

She gasped lightly, holding a light hand to her mouth as her eyebrows furrrowed in concern. “Oh no, I had no clue… I’ll definitely do that, thanks for the notice!” [name] chuckled bashfully, rubbing her nape before making eye contact again. “Actually— I made breakfast, would you want to come inside and eat?”

Ah, just as he had planned. 

“I wouldn’t want to impose, but if you’re offering, sure!” Another smile, another lighthearted chuckle, and Suguru made his way inside, shutting the door behind him.

[name] didn’t hear it lock with a soft snick. 

As the pair helped themselves to the spread of pancakes, coffee, and some lovely cookies, they made pleasant small talk. The string had begun to tighten, and Suguru felt his hunger only grow to an insatiable amount. God, he knew everything about her, absolutely everything— Why couldn’t she see how much he could give her—?

Things seemed to slow down a bit, finishing up breakfast and their conversation. Suguru knew this would be where he was supposed to say something about his leave, and, well, leave, but that wouldn’t be any fun. Instead, he resorted to just laying his eyes on the wonder in front of him, taking in the peace for a few more moments.

He knew what he was about to do was anything but keeping peace.

Suguru was adjacent to [name] at this point, so he leant over, casual as he placed his arm behind her head and nuzzling up close. She wouldn’t say anything about it, he knew that. He rubbed familiar circles on her shoulder, eyes dismissive as they ran down her frame. 

[name] was the one to break the silence, seemingly made a little uncomfortable by it. “I, uh— Did you have any plans for today, Suguru?” She faked a stretch, really just trying to use the opportunity to scoot a little away from him, but his arm kept her firmly in place.

He answered nonchalantly, watching carefully as she tried again to lean forward and take a cookie into her mouth, not-so-subtly moving away too. His lips curled into a smirk, “No, not really. I honestly just wanted to make sure my slut wasn’t back in contact with anyone I didn’t want her to.”

The girl promptly choked on her food, coughing and standing up, eyes blown wide with terror. A hand shot out to her wrist, but her teary whimper still echoed. “What—?!” Not what she wanted to hear, not what she thought she would hear— But preconceptions often fail us anyways. Pure, carnal fear rushed through her veins, legs stumbling to get away—

Suguru pulled [name] into his lap with ease, keeping her down no matter how she struggled. Nose buried into her neck along with his teeth, he chuckled lowly.

“Shh, don’t cry sweetheart, please— I just wanna help you see what you’re not realizing.” An uncomfortably gentle kiss placed under her jaw, hips grinding up into hers, “This was bound to happen. We were meant to be.”

The planets do fall as easily as humans. Jupiter crumbled into specks of dust, and amends couldn’t be made. Universal symphonies are mistaken for cacophanies, so what stops a kiss from morphing into a bite?

𝘱𝘭𝘴𝘴𝘴𝘴 𝘴𝘦𝘯𝘥 𝘪𝘯 𝘮𝘰𝘳𝘦 𝘳𝘦𝘲𝘶𝘦𝘴𝘵𝘴 𝘨𝘶𝘺𝘴 𝘪𝘮 𝘣𝘦𝘨𝘨𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘪 𝘯𝘦𝘦𝘥 𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘮 𝘴𝘮𝘮𝘮 𝘩𝘰𝘱𝘦 𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘴 𝘸𝘢𝘴 𝘨𝘰𝘰𝘥𝘥𝘥𝘥 𝘱𝘭𝘴 𝘤𝘰𝘮𝘮𝘦𝘯𝘵 𝘵𝘰𝘰 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘴𝘦𝘯𝘥 𝘪𝘯 𝘴𝘵𝘶𝘧𝘧 𝘪𝘯 𝘮𝘺 𝘪𝘯𝘣𝘰𝘹 !!! 𝘪 𝘭𝘰𝘷𝘦𝘦𝘦 𝘧𝘦𝘦𝘥𝘣𝘢𝘤𝘬𝘬𝘬 𝘰𝘬 𝘱𝘦𝘢𝘤𝘦𝘦 𝘱𝘳𝘪𝘹 𝘰𝘶𝘵 𝘭𝘰𝘷𝘦 𝘶 𝘨𝘶𝘺𝘴 ☆

𝐦𝐞𝐭𝐚𝐧𝐨𝐢𝐚.

𝘤𝘩𝘢𝘳𝘢𝘤𝘵𝘦𝘳𝘴 — 𝘺𝘢𝘯𝘥𝘦𝘳𝘦! 𝘮𝘦𝘨𝘶𝘮𝘪 𝘧𝘶𝘴𝘩𝘪𝘨𝘶𝘳𝘰 𝘹 𝘧𝘦𝘮! 𝘳𝘦𝘢𝘥𝘦𝘳

𝘵𝘸 — 𝘳𝘢𝘱𝘦/𝘯𝘰𝘯𝘤𝘰𝘯, 𝘴𝘮𝘶𝘵, 𝘢𝘧𝘵𝘦𝘳𝘮𝘢𝘵𝘩 𝘰𝘧 𝘯𝘰𝘯𝘤𝘰𝘯, 𝘦𝘹𝘵𝘳𝘦𝘮𝘦 𝘺𝘢𝘯𝘥𝘦𝘳𝘦, 𝘴𝘸𝘦𝘢𝘳𝘪𝘯𝘨, 𝘴𝘭𝘪𝘨𝘩𝘵 𝘤𝘩𝘢𝘴𝘪𝘯𝘨, 𝘴𝘰𝘮𝘦 𝘳𝘦𝘭𝘪𝘨𝘪𝘰𝘶𝘴 𝘪𝘮𝘢𝘨𝘦𝘳𝘺 𝘢𝘨𝘢𝘪𝘯, 𝘮𝘦𝘯𝘵𝘪𝘰𝘯 𝘰𝘧 𝘯𝘢𝘶𝘴𝘦𝘢, 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘫𝘶𝘴𝘵 𝘪𝘯 𝘨𝘦𝘯𝘦𝘳𝘢𝘭 𝘦𝘹𝘵𝘳𝘦𝘮𝘦𝘭𝘺 𝘥𝘢𝘳𝘬 𝘤𝘰𝘯𝘵𝘦𝘯𝘵

It’s an odd thing, she realized. Practically lunacy. Rapt, her hand traced the outline of her collarbone, eyes following the motion in the mirror. Maybe she hoped for a lag in the reflection. This was a trick mirror, it had to be. 

The muted olive walls of the bathroom closed in on her. Dim lighting, an orange-ish tint to the bulbs. Far too saturated, suffocating, she was choking herself out as thoughts swarmed around her mind. Lips parting in a quiet denial of the situation, she almost missed how her whole body was trembling.

[name] ran fingers through her hair in an effort to ground herself. Purple bruises and red bitemarks littered across her neck and collar, she flinched at the memory that came with them. She didn’t wear concealer, so she wouldn’t have any in her purse. Imperfections of her face bubbled up, but it wasn’t enough to rip her attention away from the marks.

Jujutsu High was supposed to be a safe haven. It was supposed to be somewhere she could focus on strengthening her skills, somewhere she could escape her ignorant and awful family — But tragedy tends to follow those who combat it the most. 

A shaky breath, and [name] crumbled to the floor in a heap. She could hardly breathe, scratching at her skin, rubbing furiously at her body as her cries echoed in cracked whispers, “God, please get it off— Get his touch off— I-I can’t—” She hiccupped, tears rapid in their descent down her face. 

Her knees ached from the coldness of the tiled floor, bathtub in her peripheral suddenly looking more like a coffin than anything else. She wondered, for a moment, — If she filled the tub with water and let the crystal substance fill her lungs, would she feel clean?

Bring her to the forest, dump her body on the grass. Nature will be gentler than any man. 

Megumi Fushiguro wasn’t a bad man. That’s what [name] believed. She saw his stoicism as gentleness to the world. She saw his silence as peace. And, of course, she saw his potential as a sorcerer. She was the one who brought it to his attention, just before Gojo even got the idea to talk to him.

The girl had approached him just before he was to close his room’s door for the night. 

[name] smiled softly, eyes not meeting his as she tried to step out of her comfort zone. “I just think you have a lot of amazing things you’d be able to do! You can bring out your potential, I just— I think you can pull it out of yourself, hon’, I really do…” She dared a glance up into his eyes, suppressing a wince when he had been looking at her the whole time. “If that makes sense, of course! Sorry, I don’t know why I—”

She was cut off by a quiet laugh. It wasn’t harsh or biting, not even mocking — It was a genuine, soft laugh. Finally turning to look at him properly, her heart almost fluttered. He was smiling, eyes crinkling upward at the notion. Despite her hesitation, he looked so… happy. He was shining, honestly. 

“ Thanks, [name]. I, ah, needed that.” He ran a hand through his fluffy raven locks, gunmetal hues resting on her face. Unmoving. His cheeks were dusted a light pink. She internally breathed a sigh of relief, laughing with him. Her own smile was made even brighter than before, cheeks starting to hurt. 

Megumi almost brought his hand up to affectionately ruffle her hair, but stopped himself. He could hold on for a bit longer, he could— He observed the crinkle in her eyes, the bags under them, the moles, the light in her pupils, and suddenly, he recognized life as short. 

[name] had to depart, she decided with a glance at her phone. She didn’t want to ruin the moment, but she’d promised Itadori a hangout. She was about to wave goodbye, the words settling on her tongue— If not for his hand shooting up, grabbing her wrist before she could even try to pull back. 

The countdown started. Megumi liked to believe he was great at keeping all of his true thoughts and feeling under wraps. 

[name] didn’t flinch. Why would she? She’d gotten comfortable with Megumi, there was no reason for her to— 

Oh.

His eyes had darkened. She didn’t think it had been possible, really, but all the memories of her family had come rushing back. A tidal wave of sin, the sudden recession of an ocean. She looked at their intertwined hands, then back up at his face. Something in the air had shifted. 

The girl gave a cautious tug at her wrist, eyes no longer possessing the strength of contact with his. “Ah, I gotta go hon’—, Promised Yuuji I’d hang out with him.” She experimentally tugged again, but to no avail. Her lips turned the slightest bit downward.

Perhaps the scariest part was Megumi’s silence. The way his eyes fell dull, completely unlike the smile on his face just moments before. Was his previous grin sardonic? Did she not catch the undertone? His grip on [name]’s wrist only tightened a considerable amount, brows creasing together in a look that mirrored— What, betrayal? Annoyance? Was she being annoying for trying to leave?

“...Megumi?” Cautious. She realized her tone was cautious. What changed? Just a few minutes ago she felt completely comfortable with him, she was at peace and felt that he was someone she could trust, but now—

She didn’t get the chance to respond. The quiet of the hallway sank in quickly as he yanked her feeble frame inside. A yelp, but it reached no one as the door slammed shut. 

[name] turned to Megumi, eyes wide and pupils just shaking with fear. Silence, as it was, spoke fucking volumes. She hadn’t noticed it before, the way his gunmetal blue eyes dragged along her body, sizing her up like lamb to the slaughter. 

He took a step forward, dorm floor creaking with the notion. She took one back. It took a second, but her flight instinct kicked in. Turning on her heel, [name] went for a mad dash for the backdoor. It led to his balcony, so maybe if she jumped and ran for Yuuji, or Gojo Sensei, or Nobara— 

A single hand caught on her hair and pulled. A wounded whimper left the girl’s throat, body crashing right back into the ravenette’s. She struggled as much as possible, but it didn’t do much when he just got her right up against the nearest wall. 

Those gunmetal eyes carried the embers of hell, she thought. Despite her weak whines and cries, the devil’s whispers painted fluttering kisses to cloud any sane thought she hoped had burrowed into Megumi’s mind.

He pinned her wrists above her head, frame completely devouring hers as he dove in for a kiss. She squirmed under him, trying to turn her head, but one of his hands only held her chin in place. This was her worst nightmare turned ten times more malicious. 

His hands roamed her body with the desire of Eros, the pursuit of Persephone from Hades, the longing of Pothos — A man possessed by tragedy. She had to be his lyre, the instrument he used and used and used and used—

[name] cried out as his teeth sank into the soft of her neck. His tongue seemed to lap up the blood easily, as if an apology for his unbridled animosity. He treated her like glass he knew could be repaired. Delicate, but made for shattering.

Megumi seemed to hardly use any strength to rip the front of her shirt open with one hand, leaning down to pepper his kisses down her chest. The tattered remains of her shirt and bra fell to the floor, leaving the upper part of her body completely vulnerable and to his mercy. Teeth on skin, marking, sucking — He was making sure no inch of her didn’t carry him.

A breath, and [name] almost thought he’d come to his senses with the way his ministrations paused. However, she was proven wrong when he moved to remove her bottoms too. His free hand reached down and began to rub circles on her, now, exposed clit. She writhed as much as she could, breathless pleas falling from her lips as his long fingers worked their way inside of her, eliciting even more pained cries.

The boy didn’t offer a response, much too lost in everything about the moment. She was under him, whimpering because of him, this wet because of him— What else could he ever ask for?

In one swift movement, Megumi lifted her thighs to rest around his waist. He had pulled his sweatpants down enough to rub his erection against her bare pussy. She winced at the movement, head thrown back against the wall as his grip tightened around her wrists. A quietly strained groan left his throat, the first noise he’d made this whole time. 

[name] bit her tongue so as to not offer any other response that may satisfy, resorting to quietly struggling against him again. He, of course, did not budge one bit. The horror she felt before only increased when the head of his cock started to push into her. A strangled cry, eyes squeezing shut as he sunk deeper and deeper into her warmth.

He groaned quietly again, just letting his hips rest against hers for a moment. It didn’t last very long though, as he slowly started to roll his thrusts into her, face buried in her neck as she kept her head held high against the wall.

The thrusts started off fairly slow, but he really just— couldn’t get enough. Megumi hissed a quiet ‘fuck…’, pace increasing a great amount. She tried to hold back, but her back had already arched the tiniest bit, canines digging into her lip.

The brutality of how he fucked her just got worse and worse, and soon enough the whole dorm was full of both of their strained moans, skin slapping against skin, thumps against the wall. She couldn’t take it anymore, tears streaming down her face for a while now as she begged him to just stop, stop, stop—

But it doesn’t take a genius to see how he was far too deep in to tap out now. Megumi’s groans and soft whines echoed against the wall, and he couldn’t care less that Yuuji could easily hear them from the next room over. If anything, that was good — Maybe Yuuji’d take the hint after hearing her moan his name instead. 

[name]’s breath quickened, climax approaching, but the sick feeling of being taken advantage of like this, the dirtiness that came with an orgasm from such a sick person— She couldn’t do this. She didn’t want to, she never wanted to. 

Pitch black hair bounced with each pronounced thrust, but his pace grew sloppy. [name]’s breath hitched at the slow realization. It felt like the world had come crumbling down in an instant, and her fear grew impossibly larger. 

“M-Megumi— Not in– Not inside, please—” She stammered, but it really only came out as a whine or whimper than a command. 

Like always, he didn’t offer a response. He just kept fucking into her at that same brutal pace, before his hips stuttered along with her pleas — And before she knew it, he was shooting ropes of white into her tight walls. 

Breathing heavily, Megumi’s hips stayed against hers again, just relishing in the heat pulsing between the two of them. After a few moments of panting and an intimacy she wanted to rip from her body, he let her thighs uncoil from around his waist.

The boy pulled out, juices running down both of their thighs as he tucked himself away. [name] slumped against the wall, in a pool of her own ripped up clothes, completely open and vulnerable to the man who had taken advantage of her. She tucked her knees into her chest, eyes blank and empty as she tried to catch her breath.

Megumi ran a hand through his hair, light sweat catching onto his skin. He clicked his tongue gently, seeming to weigh his options before pulling her up into his arms. She flinched violently, and that only got another click of his tongue. He brought her into the washroom, running a warm bath and shutting the door for the sake of privacy. Ironic, isn’t it?

Which… leads to…

Right now. 

[name] ran a hand down her face, breaths significantly slower but still short. She was completely out of touch right now, eyes swirling with fatigue, blankness, and something akin to horror.

Standing up, she found it in herself to at least wash the parts she felt most dirty, but as she pulled on the spare clothes Megumi had given her, it didn’t make her feel any better. She took a heavy breath, giving it a once-over in the mirror. The oversized shirt hung low enough on her neck to expose all the marks and bruises littered all over the skin, and he hadn’t supplied her with a bra either. No matter what, she was exposed to him.

She blinked the fatigue in her eyes away for the sake of trying to figure out an action plan. If she can exit his dorm right now, get to one of the higher ups and report this, hell, even Yuuji— 

Yeah. She can do that. She rubbed her eyes, lashes damp with still fresh tears. She can do this. Her hand went to the door knob—

But the door swung open itself, Megumi stepping in and shutting the door behind him. He thought himself to be good at keeping his true thoughts and feelings under wraps at all times, he really did — And yet, as he pushed the terrified girl up against the sink, teeth sinking into her neck once more, he knew it was bullshit.

Rome wasn’t built in a day, but it sure as hell burned in one.

𝘱𝘭𝘴𝘴𝘴𝘴 𝘴𝘦𝘯𝘥 𝘪𝘯 𝘮𝘰𝘳𝘦 𝘳𝘦𝘲𝘶𝘦𝘴𝘵𝘴 𝘨𝘶𝘺𝘴 𝘪𝘮 𝘣𝘦𝘨𝘨𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘪 𝘯𝘦𝘦𝘥 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘸𝘳𝘪𝘵𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘪𝘥𝘦𝘢𝘴 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘧𝘶𝘦𝘭 𝘧𝘦𝘦𝘥𝘣𝘢𝘤𝘬 𝘪𝘴 𝘢𝘭𝘸𝘢𝘺𝘴 𝘢𝘱𝘱𝘳𝘦𝘤𝘪𝘢𝘵𝘦𝘥𝘥𝘥 𝘰𝘬 𝘱𝘦𝘢𝘤𝘦𝘦 𝘱𝘳𝘪𝘹 𝘰𝘶𝘵 𝘭𝘰𝘷𝘦 𝘶 𝘨𝘶𝘺𝘴 ☆

𝐝𝐢𝐥𝐨𝐫𝐢𝐜𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧.

𝘤𝘩𝘢𝘳𝘢𝘤𝘵𝘦𝘳𝘴 — 𝘺𝘢𝘯𝘥𝘦𝘳𝘦! 𝘴𝘢𝘵𝘰𝘳𝘶 𝘨𝘰𝘫𝘰 & 𝘺𝘢𝘯𝘥𝘦𝘳𝘦! 𝘴𝘶𝘨𝘶𝘳𝘶 𝘨𝘦𝘵𝘰 𝘹 𝘧𝘦𝘮! 𝘳𝘦𝘢𝘥𝘦𝘳

𝘵𝘸 — 𝘪𝘮𝘱𝘭𝘪𝘦𝘥 𝘯𝘰𝘯𝘤𝘰𝘯 (𝘪𝘵 𝘣𝘢𝘴𝘪𝘤𝘢𝘭𝘭𝘺 𝘩𝘢𝘱𝘱𝘦𝘯𝘴 𝘵𝘩𝘰𝘶𝘨𝘩), 𝘴/𝘢, 𝘨𝘰𝘳𝘦, 𝘮𝘶𝘳𝘥𝘦𝘳, 𝘪𝘮𝘱𝘭𝘪𝘦𝘥 𝘴𝘵𝘢𝘭𝘬𝘪𝘯𝘨, 𝘮𝘦𝘯𝘵𝘪𝘰𝘯 𝘰𝘧 𝘯𝘢𝘶𝘴𝘦𝘢, 𝘤𝘩𝘢𝘴𝘪𝘯𝘨, 𝘦𝘹𝘵𝘳𝘦𝘮𝘦 𝘺𝘢𝘯𝘥𝘦𝘳𝘦, 𝘳𝘦𝘭𝘪𝘨𝘪𝘰𝘶𝘴 𝘪𝘮𝘢𝘨𝘦𝘳𝘺 𝘣𝘶𝘵 𝘪 𝘱𝘳𝘰𝘮𝘪𝘴𝘦 𝘪𝘵 𝘥𝘰𝘦𝘴𝘯’𝘵 𝘵𝘢𝘬𝘦 𝘢𝘸𝘢𝘺 𝘧𝘳𝘰𝘮 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘱𝘭𝘰𝘵 𝘪 𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘬 𝘪𝘥𝘬, 𝘥𝘢𝘳𝘬 𝘤𝘰𝘯𝘵𝘦𝘯𝘵 𝘪𝘯 𝘨𝘦𝘯𝘦𝘳𝘢𝘭

A fresh new start always felt like bull.

It was like fate itself holding her life on puppet strings. Moving her like a numb pawn in a chess game. Everything felt calculated for everything except her. She just had to wait for things to go her way every once in a while, before it fell apart again.

Right now, it was going fairly mundanely. Nothing interesting or even mildly negative had happened in a while, though nothing had either. She had already been living alone for quite some time. Moved out of her parents’ house as soon as possible and invested in a house of her own for the sole reason of hating apartments. Too rickety, and she would feel safer in a smaller, single house than with broken windows or whatever else.

[name] ran a ringed hand through her hair, huffing out a breath as she hauled her cross-body bag over her shoulder. The job down at the local cafe awaited straight ahead, and despite her fears, she wasn’t a child anymore, she could do this. 

Morning pink and white skies, highlighted with gold clouds had her taking in the fresh air. In fact, it wasn’t until she picked her walking pace up again, stepping toward the cafe doors, that the slightest bit of dread began to pool in her stomach.

A sigh, and [name] reached for the handle as she made her way inside. Her eyes wandered, trailing along the gold embellishments among the otherwise green, brown, and orange-ish tints around her. She lumbered on her way to the back of the building, swiftly tugging her uniform on and starting to take orders from her position as cashier.

Customers piling in couldn’t deny the coziness, some of them staying for quite some time. [name] herself enjoyed every second spent on the job and could never imagine quitting. Or— At least… Those were her premonitions for now. It was a steady source of income while living alone, the atmosphere was nice, the people were nice, it wasn’t—

The doors opened just as the clock chimed at 3 o’clock. 

Not even a divine mercy could save such a tragedy. In waltzed two figures, tall in stature and a bit intimidating with their builds. [name] gulped for a second, feeling the cozy air around her start to dissipate. Despite recognizing them as regulars, the girl was unsettled. They always came in and just… observed her every move. She averted her gaze for the sake of her own well-being, lips pursing and unpursing. The feeling of her lip gloss brought back some sense, and she snapped out of her stupor.

In the short time she’d looked at them, she noticed they looked pretty identical to the last time. Cold white hair, blue eyes that held the world in their irises, black uniform — He was the one whose gaze raked along her entire figure, always whispering obscene things to his friend. Of course, said friend had raven hair, long locks that swayed with each step. They were tied up into a bun, and his matching eyes always remained locked on her face, barely wavering. His irises held nothing but sorrow, the weight of the universe—

‘Don’t judge people by their looks,’ She reminded herself. It’s rude to do so, even in this case… Her eyes flicked back to the pair, and she physically had to hold herself back from flinching. Both of their gazes were locked right onto her, one sporting a small smirk, and the other smiling softly. 

The man smirking ran a hand through his snowy white hair, whistling lowly and leaning over to whisper something in his presumed friend’s ear. The smiling man whispered something as well, raven locks swaying in the small breeze. She wouldn’t have cared about any of this had their stares not been piercing into her. Something felt off, something really felt off— What was once just invasive had turned predatory. At least before, it didn’t feel like this.

The first time the pair had come into the cafe, they took a seat and seemed to talk casually for a bit. They weren’t ordering anything, but just to be sure, [name] had made her way over and asked them if they wanted to try anything off the menu. She tried and failed to conceal her wince when their eyes snapped up to meet hers. 

That was the first time she’d experienced true intimidation. Satan regarded the two of them with a shiver, and she felt her hand tremble at her side. As if they had gotten what they wanted, the pair smiled, but the notion didn’t reach their eyes. 

Neither one of them spoke a word for a moment, until—

“Just coffee, thanks.” The ravenette had a gentle voice, countering his intimidating stature. She nodded, a strained ‘Of course!’ falling from her lips before she walked back to her place at the counter. Still, she felt their burning stares pierce through her back. 

Fate held a scissor to the string.

She tried to mind her own business. She really did. Returning to brewing some coffee for the person in line, sliding it across the table, and giving them a smile. Her lips could barely form the words, “Have a good day,” before she cut herself off, eyes widening. The coffee she had handed them knocked out of their grasp, laying spilled on the floor. 

[name] gasped quietly, eyes darting back up to meet black and blue hues. She froze a second, suddenly realizing that while she’d been on autopilot, spacing out— The rest of the cafe had gone empty. Beginning to yell at the pair, the customer the coffee had been for looked beyond pissed. They opened their mouth to continue screaming at the white-haired man, but—

A swift flick of his fingers, and the customer went flying across the room, seemingly gaining momentum as they crashed against the wall and hit their head hard enough to knock out. A sickening crack echoed throughout the room, allowing [name] to freeze completely. Her face paled in horror at the sight, a horrifying entity forming right behind the customer. They didn’t get the chance to fight, head effectively bitten clean off their body. 

Blood poured forth from the stump like that of the Lord, body falling limp. The crimson color had splattered all over the walls and floor, a horrifying canvas of the spiral to hell, to purgatory— 

Muted noiret hair cascaded over his shoulder as the man knelt on one knee in front of the body. He seemed to observe the way a few ants had already begun crawling out of the small hole in the wall, breaths quiet. Then, he cracked a smile. “‘Eli, Eli, lama sabachthani?’… May your god have mercy on your soul, low-life.”

With that, the entity swallowed the rest of the customer up whole.

It was quiet for a second. A clock ticked in the background, but she swore it almost felt like the seconds had slowed down. [name]’s mind was running wild with the visual and implied information dumped onto her. ‘What was that entity? Why did they kill the customer? What were they gonna do to her? Was this it? Were they going to kill her too?’

Despite the icy look he sent the corpse, the white-haired man huffed out a snicker. “C’mon, Suguru, don’t be like that.” He dragged the last word out, cracking his knuckles in front of him. His sapphire eyes took their time in studying every reaction [name] had to offer. From her shivers to her darting eyes — He consumed it all.

The ravenette chuckled too, lightheartedly smacking the other on the back. “How else should I be, Satoru?”

That seemed to snap her out of her state. The girl tried to scream, all blood leaving her face, but all she could form was a weak whimper. Her hands clutched at her uniform in an effort to ground herself, trying to sprint for the back. There were about 15 steps between herself and the door. She only made 3. 

A hand clasped around her wrist, tugging her backward and into a chest. “Trying to leave so soon? Oh c’mon now, princess,” Satoru’s hand trailed down to her waist, lips brushing against her earlobe and greedily drinking up the shivers he got in return. “We haven’t even started yet.”

Suguru made his way to her front, one hand in his pocket while the other grabbed her cheeks to make sure she looked right into those pools of tar. He smiled softly, a stark contrast to Satoru’s smug grin as his lips nipped at her neck. Suguru took in every little detail of her face, including the blood from the customer’s splatter. The pores, the imperfections, the perfections— He couldn’t get enough. 

“You’re a beautiful thing, y’know that?” He muttered, as if it was a secret only between the two of them. Something that no one else should ever know about. She tried to form a remark, anything to tell them off— But all it sounded like to them was a puppy’s whines.

His lips came crashing onto hers with a passion that rivaled Hades as he pursued Persephone. [name] tried desperately to push them off, using every bit of the strength she had— Yet as they backed her into the backroom, she knew it was all in vain. The realization didn’t stop her though, lips finally pushing past their rest and yelling for them to stop, almost sure it might draw the attention of someone outside. Before they closed the door, she saw that it had begun to pour rain, loud enough to completely mask any and all of her noises.

Satoru was the one that pushed her down onto the counter, Suguru immediately beginning to pull her oversized shirt off. The white haired man ran a hand through his strands at the sight, a hissed “Fuck,…” pulling through his throat. The ravenette saw how [name] tried to cover herself again, face pink, and immediately pinned her wrists above her head.

“Shh… It’s— It’s okay, we’ll take care of you, right, ‘Toru?” His voice was tight, like he was refraining from saying something, doing something— She tried to tug her wrists away from his hold, yelling for help, telling them to stop, just about anything that could just end the moment here and now. 

A chuckle, and Satoru leaned over her body, face mere centimeters from hers. His lips practically brushed hers as those damned jewel-like orbs devoured her own. 

“Yeah, we’ll treat ya real good, princess.”

𝘥𝘦𝘢𝘥𝘢𝘴𝘴 𝘫𝘶𝘴𝘵 𝘱𝘳𝘢𝘺𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘸𝘢𝘴 𝘨𝘰𝘰𝘥 𝘭𝘮𝘢𝘰 𝘱𝘭𝘴 𝘴𝘦𝘯𝘥 𝘪𝘯 𝘳𝘦𝘲𝘶𝘦𝘴𝘵𝘴 𝘮𝘺 𝘢𝘯𝘯𝘶𝘢𝘭 𝘰𝘤𝘵𝘰𝘣𝘦𝘳-𝘭𝘺 𝘸𝘳𝘪𝘵𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘧𝘶𝘦𝘭 𝘮𝘪𝘨𝘩𝘵 𝘯𝘰𝘵 𝘭𝘢𝘴𝘵 𝘸𝘪𝘵𝘩𝘰𝘶𝘵 𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘮 𝘰𝘬 𝘱𝘦𝘢𝘤𝘦 𝘱𝘳𝘪𝘹 𝘰𝘶𝘵 ☆