Three Days Of No Meds And Sleepiness And Full Stomach. I Wonder How It Would Be When I Start Taking My

kinda wanna leave. kinda wanna ghost everyone. kinda wanna rot under a blanket. kinda wanna feel loved. kinda wanna feel wanted. kinda wanna

This. Oh man, this.

Until you live with bpd you'll never know what it's like to be too much and not enough at the same time.

It's so much easier to push people away. I don't want to feel anything. I want to turn off my emotions and self destruct. I refuse to feel grief or any strong emotion that I just don't want to feel. I'd rather not think about any of those emotions and just keep trying to destroy myself. I can't cope with real life. I'd rather make them hate me. My brain is telling me to push them away. And I can't stop it.

Migraine aura + Splitting/ Spiraling = Fucked

I just read “each time you open a book and read, a tree smiles knowing there's life after death”and OH MY GOD

Time to go underground and push everyone away after an overwhelming weekend.

I'd like to stop being anxious now. My head is exploding.

Lo and Behold, the Low is here!

And so am I. Hihi.

Sigh.

yeah

i wanna lay under my blanket and die

As a mentally ill, chronically ill, atheist person I really do wish I believed sometimes. Give me something or someone to blame or bargain with. But I’m just alone in this decaying universe stuck inside a decaying dysfunctional meat suit.