Latest Posts by katikiller - Page 2

I like cake

Butter knifes are commonly used to spread stuff on bread. Spatulas are commonly used to spread stuff on baked goods. They are, apparently, not interchangeable.

I’ve seen people say “people who drink straight milk are to be feared”. And yes. You should fear me. My bones have been strengthened 10x that of the human man. I have fallen out of so many trees and off of so many high things and had so many chances to break my bones but they have the strength of steel.

The word "lover" is just.... the tenderness... the romance.... the gender neutrality.... whats not to love

anyone: what state are you from?

me: plasma

I’m writing a Harry Potter au in my head. So far my favorite change is that There was no Battle of Hogwarts. Instead, a couple years later, when Harry in an auror, he gets an assignment to track down Voldemort. Since he’s so magic dependent when they find him the break his wand and set him on the muggle world. (This is before Hermione is in office). And a couple days later he’s arrested for running around a public park screaming about “why can’t I kill that stupid child!” He later gets shanked and killed in prison after molesting a fellow inmate.

Im not planning on going to hell but if I end up there I’m gonna find Satan and ask “did it hurt when you fell from heaven?” I just wanna know his reaction.

So I got home and my brothers friends are over and one of them was like “want a pumpkin spice cookie I made?” And it took me a second to think about it because it caught me off guard and I was spacing out and she goes “it’s not laced” and like, I didn’t expect it to be but now I’m kinda sus of it.

My mom: you have to wear a bra

Me: *doesn’t wear a bra*

My mom: *doesn’t notice*

She says it’s distracting but she is the only one who has ever told me that I have to wear a bra. She says “well what if I didn’t wear a bra?” 1) you have much bigger boobs than me 2) I wouldn’t care! No one cares. No one notices. If they do they don’t mention it. I have small boob!

#freedatittieprotectdacity

So I use Flo as my period app and there is this thing called secret chat where you chat anonymously. One of the questions was Any Tips For Someones First Kiss? And

I just love whoever said this. This is how you do it.

Update: they are corpses that are infected with a fungus that animates corpses and is spread by injection into the blood stream.

1: would vampires breast feed? 2: when do baby vampires get their fangs?

1: would vampires breast feed? 2: when do baby vampires get their fangs?

The school hotdogs taste like coagulated hotdog water in a nice cardboard bun.

So I’m currently writing a book and the trope is unwilling friends to almost lovers to enemy’s to lovers. It sounds confusing but it’s not that confusing. If you have any suggestions on how I could find tune this I’m open to those suggestions.

In a zombie apocalypse I would be the one trying to watch tv and not know what’s wrong. Like Stacy from phineas and ferb. Either that or is he the first to get infected.

I’m so tired of humans. After low contact and then back to full contact my social limit was reached Wednesday and now I have no emotion left. My brain said “when we get home we’re gonna have a break down and cry” and I said “ok. Wait I don’t want to alarm my parents” so now we’re posting this on tumblr for whoever to see rather than asking for help from a qualified person.

i am a straight female but there is a really cute girl in my womens studies class. is it appropriate to tell her that i think shes hot as hell?

Ok so apparently salvation army sucks so don't support it.

DO NOT SUPPORT SALVATION ARMY 

imma try to not get too political but F YEAH! GO BARBIE!

ok let's see what's been posted since I last watched youtu-

BARBIE?? SAID BLM?? WHAT HELL YEAH WHAT

over dinner my father decided to inform me that poop is mostly plant based so it is vegan. i dont remember if it was all poop or only goat poop.

YESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS!!!!!

Girls don’t want boyfriends. Girls want bookshelves with sliding ladders.

ive seen a bunch of things where its like “murder is not the answer. its a question and the anwer is yes.” but how about murder is a rhetorical question. murder? we’ll never know. theres no real answer. 

ok so im new to this tumblr sheet right? but like i feel an obligation to post crap from then depths of my soul so we’re gonna have a fun time ok? ok. 

ok so i just got a tumblr and i was reading a really good book and then my brain says “hey lets get on tumblr” and now i regret nothing but it was just very funny. i will update if i do end up regretting.