Im Sorry But My Boy Chuck Here

Easy in Bastogne: We might be okay. [Huge explosion.] Well, no, probably not now."

Muck, over the phone, holding his bloody nose: Hey, Malark! We're best friends, right, bro?

Malarkey, sighing: Normally I would say yes without hesitation, but I feel like this is heading somewhere I won't like.

Ron Speirs: Synonyms are so weird, because if you invite someone to your cottage in the forest, that sounds nice and cozy, but if i invite you to my cabin in the woods, you’re gonna die.

Harry Welsh: My favorite is explaining the difference between a “butt dial” and a “booty call”.

Lewis Nixon: Also this one: “forgive me father, i have sinned” and “sorry daddy, i’ve been naughty”

Dick Winters: Language is now banned.

But I do love them

I'm sorry when did we start shipping Ronald Speirs and Lewis Nixon like was there a meeting y'all didn't tell me or what because shit I just keep seeing ronnix content out of no wear now and I want to know why like wtf

Speirs: I'd love to be sorry for that, but we all know I've done much, much worse

Winter: Lip, gather the others, we need to have another Luz-is-doing-somethlng-stupid-again-and-we-have-to-stop-hlm-before-he-hurts-someone convention .

Webster: 👁👄👁

Liebgott: Webster, you arrogant slut.

Luz: *says something stupid/annoying*

Toye: That’s it

Toye: I’m breaking up with you

Luz, grinning: You say as you continue to lay your head in my lap

Toye, glaring up at Luz from his lap: Shut the fuck up

Grant: You spent 500 dollars on face cream

Talbert: Well it's not just just face cream I also got make-up primer, optimal skin pro moisturize, detoxifying illuminator, gentle deep pore cleanser, nutri-cream anti-aging serum

Talbert: And I even got this thing *brushes face with face brush* to exfoliate... stuff and this jade roller

Grant: *looks at tab closely*

Grant: So when does it start working

Babysitter Speirs: *hiding in the bathroom with a glass of wine*

Easy Company: *screaming and destroying the house*

Speirs, to the camera: Lipton is out of town, and I desperately needed a drink to get through the rest of the night. So I’m hiding in the bathroom, having a drink. Is that wrong?

Probably Luz: *breaking something expensive upstairs*

Speirs: They don’t ever go away. They want everything you have.

Speirs: *points camera under the door*

Shifty: *on the ground, staring through the crack curiously*

Speirs: See? He follows me everywhere.

Shifty: Hi.

Shifty: Hi.

Speirs: Hi.