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Brief explanation of all of Bart’s deaths.
Hi, back by unpopular demand, ME! (Updated this cause Bart has died YET AGAIN in the timespan of this post and now, also I forgot one. So yes, Bart has died a total of five times now.💀) this is Jaybart rantpost part 2.
So, as I said in the last post, I'd explain Bart's three (Now 5) separate deaths. So without further ado, lets get on with angst!
Smallsville sacrifice: Bart actually ends up sacrificing himself for Clark Kents sake and many more in Smallsville, Giving up his speed to the Black Flash or the "grim reaper" of the speedforce. Nasty lookin guy, all black and withered. Hard to miss. He gives up his speed since his is the only one that's "pure" as Reaper Flash says, afterwards being struck by a Zeus load of lightning. After the light died down, the only thing left was a lightning bolt insignia on the ground where Bart stood. His last words were "smell ya later." (Have I mentioned how much I love him?)
Thad Thawne and the rouges: (I love Thad and I need you to understand that he's not entirely at fault for his actions, no thad hate under this roof.) Anyway, Thad was able to convince, with much bargaining, the Rouges to aid his defeating of his Twin Clone, Bart. Bart looked much older, and had taken the name Flash after everyone else "mysteriously" lost their speed and Wally was gone. So a plan was made, a fight took place, Bart was defeated and later on the Rouges weren't too thrilled about it. Just read the comic, I promise it's great. Right after he died Wally returned as Flash and soon Bart was ressurected but as a teenager again?? And then he took back his title Impulse. Don't ask.
Killed Clone: Okay, so this one is a little bit different from those cause he does technically die, but it's not by normal conventional means so let me explain. Bart has many powers that are unique from the speedforce like his speed sympathy; the ability to feel when another person in the speedforce is in trouble. One of these powers is his speed scouts. He can draw energy from the speedforce to duplicate himself with multiple carbon copies, like Naruto. Anyway, all of them are connected. If one thinks, that thought is communicated between all of them. If one is hurt, they all feel it. So after he was using them in a battle, one of his speed scouts was killed, right in front of him. He was able to feel them die, and feel himself dying even though his pain was falsified and the shock sent him into a coma that later on killed him. After he was ressurected... again, he swore to never use his speed scouts again.
White Flash: In an end-of-the-world scenerio, Barry Allen has to face the speedforce and try to speed his way to save the planet, but he wasn't fast enough. (A common reoccurring theme in Flash comics) so mama speed sent Bart as her massiah to deliver them victory. I'll share with you a quote cause it's better at explaining this than I am: “Grandpa! No time to explain. I can feel it... feel the speedforce all around me... feel it in me... now that I’ve caught up with you, I can Help. This is what I’m meant to do— it’s not enough, what you’re doing now. You’re going to need every bit you can get... every bit that’s in this weird reality... the speedforce sent me around the universe... I collected it for you... took it from Max, Wally, Jay, everyone..! I’ve come through time and space and this universe to become the speedforce’s ultamate messenger, so I could tell you this: run, grandpa. Run and save our world.” Basically he gives up all his speed and the others, sacrificing himself (AGAIN) for the greater good so that Barry might have a chance in saving their time. He turns into the White Flash right before his molecules were torn apart and he ceases, now one with the speedforce.
(SPOILERS FOR FLASH: FUTURE STATE): Bart, Max, and Barry were all looking for ways to bring Wally back from being basically possessed by Famine- yes, the one from the four horsemen. He was apparently inprisoned in the speedforce and took away all the others speed. They found a way to save him, but it was guarded by villains. Bart uses the prisma goggles and gadgets he stole. He rode into the room on a rainbow- try telling me that's not gay. you Can't. Anywho, he stole it from the calculator man, who then shot him with a laser seconds before Max electricuted him. Sad day to have to explain such a badass character was killed by someone named calculator man. At least it wasn't calendar man...
I want more Bart Allen and Jason Todd tropes
Okay, listen, because this is like hella important:
Jason Todd dies when he's still a young robin, he gets yeeted into the dirty regen bath and returns with a vengence that just hits different
Bart Allen dies as Impulse, Flash, and Kid Flash (I'll explain those in a bit) and comes back then continues to pretend like nothing happened, cause he doesn't wanna talk about it. He never does, that's just him.
So These two are already like peas in a pod-ish, but I feel like they'd have this amazing dynamic.
Bart likes to talk a lot, Jay is pretty sassy and quick to comment but not too talkative, so I feel like they'd have good discussions. Plus, Jay loves liturature and Bart is a stickler for facts about lit and science. They'd have plenty of intellectual conversations.
Jason would see past Bart's persona facade pretty easy, Bart feels more comfortable around him cause they've been through similar stuff and it takes a while but they help each other open up.
Bart would be a great outsider. He's a time anomaly, angsty speedster with way too much internalised pain from all his experiences. (Yj really didn't do him justice, pun intended) Also, he's a great drawer.
I have so much more but Im running out of rant energy rn so I'll continue in another post sometime.
Crossover? Flashfam and Batfam
#Bruce meets his match
Bruce: *staring at Bart from across the interrogation table*
Bart: *Kicking his legs and staring back*
Bruce: So, Impulse-
Bart: No.
Bruce: No?
Bart: You were gonna question me. I say no.
Bruce: You didn't hear the question.
Bart: Okay, go ahead.
Bruce: So-
Bart: No.
Bruce: *disgruntled bat noises*
Bart: *staring with a blank expression*
~ two hours later ~
Bruce: *dangling Bart upside down from the ceiling*
Bart: And then I was all like, "No way, you can't do that. That's a no-no, even in my book", and then Tim was like "I-"
Bruce: Enough, please stop. Stop talking. Leave. I'm done.
Bart: *phases out of the ties* thanks. *walks out*
Diana, on the other side of the one sided glass: I've never seen him give up so quickly.
Hal: Kids' got spunk.
Clark: We should go before Bruce tries to vent on one of us.
inaccurate Flashfam quotes #6
Bart: HAHAHAHAHHAAH YOU ALL SAID IT COULDN'T BE DONE BUT LOOK WHO'S LAUGHING NOW!!!!!
Max: What's the kid on about?
Wally: Bart made a theory that he could use Chicken Whizzees as his lightning rod.
Barry: sighs heavily and it worked...
Bart: On a table laughing hysterically with a bag of Chicken whizzees in each hand THE FUTURE IS FOOD!!!
inaccurate Core Four quotes #4
Tim: It costs 400 dollars to go see a therapist but it costs 0 to tell yourself "It be like that sometimes"
Kon, softly: Wha- No. Are you okay?
Cassie: Aren't you rich?
Bart: But, what if I start taxing you every time you say that?
Tim: Do you wanna die, Bart?
Bart: This is an economy, Tim. Nothing you do is free.
Cassie: Bart, who taught you that?
Bart, shrugging: I read it in a book somewhere.
Kon: uhm...
Cassie: Tim, you're literally rich, just pay for therapy.
Tim: No.
Bart: Why not?
Tim: Cause eat the rich.
Tim: Also student debt.
Bart: You're gonna eat somebody??
Kon: Bart, remember when we talked about metaphores?
Bart: That makes a lot more sense.
Cassie: You all need therapy.
Kon: And you don't?
Cassie: I punch things. That's theraputic.
Bart: What's therapy?
Kon: ...
Cassie: ...
Tim: ...
Cassie: Tim-
Tim, dialing Black Canary's number: Already on it.
Kon: Are you telling me you've never talked about your problems to anyone?
Bart: Why would I? problems are meant to be solved by yourself as a self discovering journy and bottled up emotions.
Kon: where'd you learn that?
Bart: Steven Universe.
Cassie: Guys, can we focus please?
Tim: She's on her way.
Bart: Who's on her way?
Cassie, wrapping a blanket around Barts shoulders: Shhh, we're gonna take care of you now.
Bart: But I'm fine-
Tim: There there, speed demon. You're in good hands.
Bart: ... sniffs thank you.
Kon: nods approvingly
inaccurate Core Four quotes #3
Tim: I'm at that age where I have only one thing on my mind.
Bart: Your massive crush on Kon?
Cassie: Student Debt?
Tim: holding a birdarang Homicide.
Tim: I'm about to stab someone.
Bart: Please don't.
Cassie: slowly takes the weapon
inaccurate Core Four quotes #1
[in the Queer Muskateers groupchat]
Bart: sends a tiktok of a duck in a bathtub
Bart: Oh sh*t it's 3 AM
Bart: My bad
Tim: That's adorable
Bart: GO TO BED
inaccurate Flashfam quotes #5
the adventures of people figuring out that all the Flash's are kleptos
Hal: Barry, we need to have a talk.
Barry: What about?
Hal: It's about the blankets.
Barry: The... blankets?
Hal: Every time you come over for a movie night and use one of my blankets, they always disapear.
Barry: ...
Hal: ...?
Barry: sniffs they're just so comfy...
...
Dick: knocks on Wally's door excessivly
Wally: opens it Hey Dickie. What's up?
Dick: Where are they?
Wally: I'm not kidding this time when I say I have no idea what you're talking about.
Dick: The hats, Wally. My hats. Where are they?
Wally: ... sighs and points to a drawr
...
Tim: ...
Bart: ...
Tim, staring at his sweatshirt: Bart-
Bart: OwO??
Tim: literally cannot say no ... You know what? Keep it.
Inaccurate FlashFam quotes #4
Bart in Reach: What if I became a superhero?
Bart: Jk jk...
Bart, also leading a revolt against the function: Unless?
Inaccurate Flashfam quotes #3
Bart: speeding into the house and locking himself in his room
Wally, utterly confused: knocks Bart, you okay in there?
Bart, nervously: Hahaha, yea! Totally! Whywouldn'tIbe?
Loud bang from inside
Bart: screeching
Tim, crawling from the air duct: WHERE'S MY CHICKEN NUGETS?!
Inaccurate Flashfam quotes #2
Bart Allen: Okay, this is it. I'm battling a Evil supervillain trying to kill me and probably my worstest enemy.
Bart's mind: Make casual conversation and playful banter the entire time.
Bart:
Bart: Let's do it.
inaccurate Batfam quotes #33
Tim and his adventures with the stubborn demi-goddess the chaotic genius and the mom friend
absolute silence in the room
Bart: Tim, have you given Kon his shirt back?
Cass: Probably not.
Tim: Stop patronizing me. hisses
Kon: That was my favourite shirt, bro.
Tim: TOO BAD!
Enveryone: silence
Bart: ...So pizza for dinner?
Cass: Yea, sounds good.
Kon: Mhmm.
///////////////////////////
Cass, walking in: Morning hoes!
Bart: Language!
Tim: Am not!
Kon: Only on weekends!
///////////////////////////
Tim: Ok, who gave bugs the right-
Bart: Insects have been around for aproxamatly 350 million years while homosapians only for 130,000 years.
Kon: He has a point.
Tim: It's a stupid point.
Bart: No wonder Blue Beetle takes over. Cause of people like you, Timmy Drake.
Tim: Wha-?
Kon: Respect your elders, Tim.
///////////////////////////
Tim, texting the group chat: Yo
Tim: am I the only one online..?
Tim: Good.
Tim: Penis
Kon: Wtf
Bart: PROFANITIES
Cass: Nice.
///////////////////////////
Bart, bursting into the room: WHO THE FUCK SIGNED ME UP FOR WEBKINZ EMAIL UPDATES?!
Tim and Cass: snickering to themselves
Kon: I'll give you one guess-
brave and the bold but it’s a teenager and a schoolteacher
A new reason for why Young Justice is all 17 and not aging. They started a Dionysus-style cult centered around Cassie to see if they could make her into a Goddess, and it worked. In return, she made them all her immortal companions'.
RR: that is in fact a threat.
*At the Watchtower for some huge meeting*
Superman: hey Red Robin! Happy belated birthday! It was last week right? How old are you now?
Red Robin: 17.
Nightwing: 20!
Everyone: *stares*
Nightwing: RR, we talked about this. You can’t just decide to stop aging. That’s not how it works. You were born 20 years ago so you are 20 years old.
Red Robin: no. I’m 17 and I really need you to stop saying I’m not.
Impulse: Yeah! We’re 17 Nightwing! We’re never gonna be older than that!
*yj core four gather round Red Robin menacingly*
Superman: what?????
Nightwing: *sighs*
Batman: *dissatisfied grunt*
Red Robin: we went through a lot of bs to become eternally 17 and I won’t let you ruin our hard work!
Wonder Woman (eternally young and suffering for it): why? Why would you do this?
Superboy: if RR is doing it we’re gonna be right there with him!
Wonder girl: *nods*
Red Robin: believe us, you don’t want to see what happens if I lose my youthful optimism.
Do you ever have to suppress the urge to get up put on your nicest clothes apply dark lipstick cast a glance at yourself in the mirror then decidedly grab your purse and just go?
