they/them (I am a minor!!) Welcome to my personal blog where I mostly yap about BSD right now… I also like writing, world building, and media analysis tho!
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Latest Posts by pebblul - Page 4
Hi there 👋,
My name is Mohammad, and I’m reaching out in a moment of desperate need. I’m a father of three young children living in Gaza, and we are caught in the midst of a catastrophic war. Our home is no longer a safe haven, and the future here seems increasingly uncertain. 💔
I’ve launched a fundraising campaign with the goal of raising $40,000 to relocate my family to a safer place where my children can grow up in peace and have a chance at a brighter future. 🕊️🇵🇸
Unfortunately, my previous fundraising efforts were abruptly halted when my account was terminated without explanation. However, I remain determined to keep fighting for my family’s safety and well-being. 🫶
If you could take a moment to read our story, consider donating, or simply share our campaign with others, it would make an incredible difference. Every act of kindness, no matter how small, brings us one step closer to safety and a new beginning. 🙏
Thank you for your time, compassion, and support. ❤
https://gofund.me/fd1faea2 🔗
Of course I will take some time for you! I hope you reach your goals and are able to help your family. 🇵🇸
Skk mermaid AU, where Dazai's the human who meets Chuuya the merman.
Chuuya has this long, almost eel-like tail. He has huge fins and spines reminiscent of the lionfish. In the water he commands so much space, his fins fanning and tail dancing in the current. He rarely rests on land because he struggles to keep his fins from getting everywhere.
Dazai usually takes his boat out to the water to see him, only occasionally will Chuuya come to the shallows, but even then he keeps most of his body in the water. Dazai is used to thinking of Chuuya as this great sea serpent instead of a merperson, because sometimes it looks like Chuuya's tail never ends when he circles around Dazai in the water.
It is a common myth that merfolk can grow legs and walk on land if they wish too and Dazai is always trying to convince Chuuya to come on land, telling him stories of all the things he'll show him beyond the beaches. Chuuya denies this myth adamantly.
But as time goes on, Chuuya's curiosity gets the better of him and he finally agrees.
The next morning Dazai is waiting by the surf, with a towel and clothes, just like they agreed. He's brought wild flowers from the fields, corny, but Chuuya is always so fascinated with the gifts from land that Dazai brings him. Excitement is bubbling in him, despite the long hours he'd told himself to be nonchalant the night before.
And then he sees Chuuya emerging from the water. A little unsteady on his new legs, the gentle waves making him unbalanced as he walks.
Dazai thinks he's further away than he his, but then Chuuya is in front of him far quicker than Dazai expected him to be. And what should have been this magical moment is ruined by Dazai bursting out laughing.
Because his great beast of the sea, his serpent with the tail that goes on forever, is a full head's height shorter than him.
i also wanted to say aroaces love chuuya too 🎀
If Atsushi gets transferred
Akutagawa: Jinko, it’s 4am why on earth are you making Chakuze?
Atsushi: Because I’ve lost control over my life.
Guys please give me your bsd disability headcanons I require sustenance
I was just trying to show my friend what a lovelock cut is.
In this blog, we believe in Yosano supremacy 🛐
Close ups under the cut because my Queen deserves it.
Just appreciate her beauty ❤
Well, I did start a blog here once before, but it didn't last even a couple of months before it was deleted for god knows what reason
let’s just remember some of my stuff here and move on as if nothing happened sigh
(reblogs of this post would be really appreciated 👁️)
when u dont like ur art take a deep breath and remember u created it from nothing, like a god
i love akutagawa because he literally just pulls up. talks like all he reads are 18th century limericks. displays clear signs of mental illness. serves cunt. dies. gets resurrected. serves cunt again. no one is doing it like he is
eggyrock's guide to being a respectful person in fanfiction spaces because some of yall are are behaving in ways that are so aggressively uncouth
if you don't like a fic, keep it to yourself. no one cares.
if you don't like an aspect of a fic (character, plot line, etc), keep it to yourself. no one cares.
if you really want an author to update a story, tell them how much you love it! do not hound them for updates or ask them when the next update is. pressure does not equal motivation! you're just being annoying.
if an author is talking abt one fic that they're excited abt, don't bother them about another one! there is nothing more disheartening that being excited about x fic and then hearing someone go "what about y fic!" see above
writers have shit to do. writers are not "lazy" for not updating every day. you're insane. i need you to understand that's an insane thing to say to someone.
remember to BE KIND!!!!!! we can all have a little laugh and a giggle together but at the end of the day, we're strangers on the internet. it's such weirdo behavior to get in a strangers inbox and talk to them like a freak
thanks for coming!
When it’s the teen members of the agency who mess up or something, it’s usually Kunikida who talks and lectures them about it. Sometimes the others will join in like Dazai or Yosano and if it’s really serious Fukuzawa will get involved, but it’s generally Kunikida.
But when the senior members of the Agency mess up or something it’s always Fukuzawa who talks to them. The only one who gets a bonus Kunikida lecture with it is Dazai. And it’s always so surreal for the teens to watch them hang their heads theatrically and head to Fukuzawa’s office.
Kunikida’a lectures pretty much always start with "what the hell were you thinking! Oh that’s right, you weren’t!" While Fukuzawa ages like 30 years, sighs heavily into his tea and is just like "I’m not mad, just disappointed."
And yet both end them by offering support and making sure everyone’s okay. Because at the end of the day whatever mistakes were made can’t be changed, what we can do is go forward with what we’ve learned to change what comes next. And all these talks come from a place of concern, of care.
Kunikida put down his tea cup. "How do I know if my words will reach them?" Fukuzawa looked from his protege to the door, gesturing him to open it. Kunikida did so, and was surprised to see Atsushi on the other side. "Oh, erm sorry Kunikida I didn’t realise you guys were busy I can come later." Kunikida shook his head, they were just wrapping up anyway. "What’s wrong Atsushi?" Atsushi went quiet before explaining his issue. "I was going to do it alone but earlier you said to call one of you for help. And Miss Yosano is busy and Ranpo and Dazai are out."
Kunikida nodded "I’m glad you came to me. Go back to your desk, I’ll be there in a minute." Atsushi smiled, relieved and went. "You’ll know" said Fukuzawa, getting Kunikida’s attention. "You’ll know your words have reached them when they come back and ask for your more." He said with a proud smile.
You'll never know how strong you are until strength is your only option."
From the heart of Gaza, these words become more true than ever. I am Bilal Abed Rabou, and I stand before you as a survivor of five wars, an academic student at Al-Azhar University and a software developer from the besieged Gaza Strip. I witnessed the devastating effects of these conditions firsthand
.
We were a family, living in peace, love and warmth. But everything changed when conflict and despair swept through our lives. Living in Gaza means confronting ongoing conflict, struggling against poverty and the lack of basic necessities to live. Life is very difficult, and even the simplest tasks seem impossible. Yet, despite all the chaos and pain, we remained grounded by the warmth of our love and the strength of our spirits.
Even six months ago, everything changed. Our once home turned into a mess and everything we cherished. Since then, we have been lost, clinging to a world of uncertainty and despair. We left our badly damaged home with only a few things. Since then, our lives have been threatened
with every passing minute.
But now, there is no longer a reason to stay in this place full of suffering, where we are deprived of even the most basic and important rights, education, security and peace.
Our hearts hurt because of all this injustice. We were willing to endure anything to keep our family together and provide comfort and care for our father in his time of need.
With each passing day, our despair grows and our burdens grow heavier. We need your help to break the cycle of suffering, rebuild our shattered dreams, pave the way to a better future, and reunite with our family. Your support is not just a lifeline; Rather, it is a beacon of hope in our darkest moments.
Here you will find our whole story
And here is the direct donation's link
Genuinely, it’s so easy to see Sigma being tired of such big behind the scenes roles, even if it’s for the Agency.
Especially because the Agency seems to already have their fill of administration and support members. (The structure of that place is kind of a mess but it works very effectively.)
It would be nice to see Sigma go through the journey of trying to put himself into a place like that, only to realize that’s not he wants, and it’s not where he fits.
Being a part of a family doesn’t mean you have to be a member of their group or organization. The best families are the ones who let you choose the path that is best for you.
So then he ends up at the cafe, and is able to build his own life and identity in that space for the first time ever.
I don't want Sigma to become a detective, purely because I don't think that's what he wants either.
He wants the love, trust and care of the Agency, he wants the same bond Dazai has with the others. He's craving a home, a family, and the Agency is the first place he's seen have that.
But he's also highly strung and nervous, he doesn't seem to like being in combative and dangerous situations. Which being a detective would place him in. He does however seem to genuinely enjoy interacting with people and providing services for people.
He loved the sky casino and whilst the sheer size of his customer base overwhelmed him, he genuinely cared about that place and making people happy.
I think, if he does join the Agency, he should join it on the administrative side. He'd get to show off his organizational skills and he'd be helping people whilst staying out of action. He has great memory so going through case files and doing the behind the scenes research to aid the detectives out on the field would suit him well. He could also attend meetings with Fukuzawa, who hates having to talk business and help with the Agency's connections.
Alternatively, if he doesn't join the Agency, I think it would be fun if he also got a job at the cafe.
Again, I think he just enjoys customer service type roles and the owner has already adopted one stray in Lucy, why not another? Sigma and Lucy would be such a fun combo, I'd love to see them interacting with the Agency whenever they're in the cafe.
Emergency: Help Evacuate My Family From GAZA WAR
Dear Humanity,
I'm Haya from Gaza , from a family of 8 people: my parents, two sons, and four daughters (two of them suffer from allergies).
I've witnessed the evidence of the tragedy that has struck our lives in Gaza, where my family and I have survived amidst numerous previous wars. But today, we face the most dangerous and fierce battle in the current war. The urgent need intensifies for us, as we have nothing left and are unable to secure our basic needs such as food, water, and safe shelter.
Here is our story - On October 7th, our lives changed forever, my family and I evacuated from northern Gaza to southern Gaza, hoping to return soon, but it wasn't meant to be. Our home was surrounded, burned, and then completely destroyed, Our home, once a fortress of hope, now lay in ruins, a stark reminder of our shattered dreams.
The night before we left from the north to the south was terrifying. Shelling sounds were everywhere, making a loud noise that felt like it went through our souls. Every explosions shook the ground like earthquakes, sending shockwaves of fear through our trembling bodies. filling us with fear. The air smelled of destruction and blood, making it hard to breathe. When dawn came, we saw the devastation around us, realizing our home was now a symbol of loss and despair.
We ran into the streets and with each step we took into the unknown streets, we felt as if we were plunging deeper into the abyss of our shattered existence, leaving behind everything we own in our home: Clothes, important official documents, the car, and literally it's almost everything - the enormity of our loss weighed heavily upon us.
Our home it was where we found hope, safety, and made precious memories. Losing it felt like losing years of our lives, leaving us adrift amidst the wreckage of our shattered existence.
A brief video depicting the devastation that struck our home and our entire neighborhood in Gaza.
Desperate Plea: Escaping Gaza's Allergy Nightmare
I, Haya, suffer from severe allergy to penicillin-derived medications, and my sister, Amal, also suffers from severe allergies to medications from my family such as Paracetamol and Ibuprofen.
These allergies create a deep sense of fear and anxiety for us, as we live in a constant state of tension and fear of anything that may require a visit to the hospital. We fear being given inappropriate medications due to the unavailability of suitable treatments in Gaza because of war or lack of awareness and not informing the doctor of our allergies, which could lead to serious consequences threatening our lives.
MY Father Income
Our dreams are heading towards oblivion in the labyrinth of an uncertain future
My story, along with my siblings, represents a united team of four individuals, three of whom are skilled programmers and one graphic designer. We work as freelancers in the world of freelancing.
As for my younger sister, she is a student studying at the College of Architecture. She has always carried a big dream in her heart, a dream of being part of changing Gaza, of making it more beautiful and better. She looked forward to the day when she would receive her degree and start building this dream. But the beginning of the war changed everything. The destruction of infrastructure and universities cast shadows of despair over her dreams.
When I think of my brother in Belgium, I can't help but feel deep sadness. He has been suffering from unbearable anxiety and insomnia since the outbreak of the war. Sleep eludes him at night, and his physical and mental health collapses under the weight of these heavy burdens, negatively affecting his performance at work. Problems and challenges pile up in front of him without the slightest opportunity for rest.
We all feel psychological pressure and extreme anxiety. The war hasn't been limited to external attacks but has deeply infiltrated our daily lives. We search among the rubble for a little safety and the basic resources for survival. Every day comes with a new challenge that we must overcome.
As we sway amidst the rubble of shattered dreams, our souls wrestle and our hearts beat strongly challenging the ravages of war.
Our parents earnestly seek a way to rescue us from this hell, feeling the heavy responsibility for every moment we spend under the shadows of fear and destruction. They dream of a safe place where they can build for us a better future, filled with security and hope, for we deserve life in all its meanings of comfort and peace.
Perhaps this fundraising campaign represents a light in the midst of darkness, it is indeed the only hope we cling to firmly.
I appeal to the world as a whole to hear my cry and the mournful cry of my family in Gaza. We need the helping hand that reaches out to wipe our tears and build a bridge to safety.
Your donation is not just a donation; it's an opportunity to rebuild life and brighten a better tomorrow. Be part of our hopeful story, for we need your hand to start anew.
The purpose of the fundraising campaign
The goal of this fundraising campaign is to rescue my family - my parents, my siblings, and me - through the Rafah Crossing to Egypt, which currently requires $5000 per person. This campaign is our only chance to stay alive, and I humbly request your assistance at this critical time. I will provide you with a comprehensive breakdown of the expenses, committing to transparency and clarity.
All of our important links are here https://linktr.ee/hayanahed
Verified by :
⭐️ operation olive branch, number 26 on their spreadsheet. (On Master list)
⭐️ Project watermelon,line 249 on their spreadsheet. Or you could see it as number 212 here is the photo for more clear proof
Thank you for your kindness and support.
.جزاكم الله خيراً
yours sincerely;
Haya Alshawish.
"Dazai is the easily flustered one" "No, Chuuya is"
You fools, its both! They are only ever confident in romantic gestures when they're the one who initiated it!
Everything is a competition with them, they know how to get under each other's skin and that not just for annoying each other. They definitely have a corner in their brains dedicated to things they've said/done that has got the other one flustered!
If you think they don't have a tally chart at home for keeping track of the amount of times they've made each other go beet red in public, you're wrong.
I like to think Kunikida is aroace or at the very least on that spectrum.
This is the hill I will passively sit on as I watch everyone else fight to their deaths.
This ^^^
I have seen so many people misconstrue this part of Atsushi’s journey and not quite grasp this scene for what it really is. It’s great to see someone break it down a bit.
i want to talk about the moment that both made me fall in love with atsushi nakajima as a character, and which made me realize that I was probably going to get obsessed with BSD.
specifically, it was this moment.
words can not describe how important this moment was to me, and how vital this is to both atsushi as a character and his relationship with dazai as a whole.
as someone who is currently living with my abusive parents, this was something that resonated with me a lot — oftentimes, media when attempting to portray abuse (specifically parental abuse) and victims of abuse, does 1 out of 2 things:
1. Tries to justify the abuse and protect the parents — having the kids be okay with the treatment they recieved.
2. Has the kids utterly despise their parents with no shred of good feelings.
And whilst, sure, both of these can happen — and I'm sure there are victims who actually feel like this — it's not the most common response.
Speaking from my own experience — I don't know how to feel about my parents. If they died, I wouldn't know what face to make. I hate them more than anyone else, but at the same time, I grew up with them. I hate them, but I also love them. If they died, I don't know how I'd feel about it. And we get to see Atsushi having that exact breakdown — the elation over the person you hate dying, versus the grief and frustration and confusion. Abuse isn't simple, and feelings aren't simply — your abuser dying isn't something that's clean cut, it comes with a million different conflicting confusing emotions.
And the fact that Atsushi is allowed to have these feelings, is allowed to hate the headmaster, is allowed to grieve without forgiveness, is so important. BSD doesn't try to justify his abuse — it's okay to mourn someone that hurt you even if you don't like them. Their death — or their intentions — don't make forgiveness a necessity.
And even moreso, the fact that he gets explicitly told that regardless of the fact that that abuse was what molded him into the person he is today and has helped him survive, and the fact that the headmaster had good intentions, it was bad and unforgivable, is extremely important.
dazai not forcing atsushi to feel a certain way about his abuser, and encouraging him to mourn without forgiveness and to actually feel, is an incredibly important moment — i doubt that i'm only speaking for myself here when i say that when dealing with these subject matters, these are the types of things we'd like to hear.
the fact that dazai is the character telling atsushi this isn't lost on me, either — considering that earlier on this chapter, he sent ryuunosuke to tell atsushi about the headmaster, and they had this interaction:
everything about this is so fascinating and well written — from atsushi having an extremely realistic breakdown over the death of his abuser, to dazai telling him that he has zero obligation for forgiveness — and the implications that he's aware that what he's done to ryuunosuke is wrong regardless of intentions, is fascinating.
to me, atsushi nakajima has always felt human in a way most protagonists don't — his trauma impacts him, he has complex messy feelings that can't be easily resolved. it's his choice what to do with his emotions, and all others can do is give advice, and let him figure out how to deal with them.
atsushi nakajima crying over the man who simultaneously raised him and made his life a living hell is accurate in a way that almost hurts.
(slightly unrelated, but i sure was accurate with this prediction from a month ago, huh!)
Dazai is not the type of person who likes to go shopping for himself. (Especially not on his own dime.)
So, he doesn’t normally realize he’s out of shampoo until it’s gone.
When that happens, he just steals some from Kunikida, because Kunikida always has an extra bottle lined up for when he runs out.
But Dazai’s done this so many times now that not only does Kunikida know it’s Dazai, he’s also begun to just buy another extra to keep in his cabinet. Except this one is a brand he picked personally for Dazai, suited for his greasy ass hair and everything.
He never said anything about it.
And although Dazai will never say it out loud, he’s just as grateful as he is amused.
As well all know, Atsushi’s haircut is the result of the other kids at the orphanage. They would cut his hair without caring, and any time he tried to cut it himself, they would take the scissors and “cut it for him.”
So it’s only natural that Atsushi would grow to hate getting haircuts from anyone.
It’s not that he doesn’t trust the kind people in his life to try their best, (well, except maybe Dazai) it’s that it reminds him so much of what the other kids would do. And that puts him on edge the entire time.
He sits there, waiting, expecting them to suddenly yank his hair and start cutting at random while laughing and taunting him. And he hates feeling like those he cares about are going to hurt him. So he cuts his hair himself.
Maybe one day he can re-learn that trust, but for now he’s content to do it himself. Even if he’s less than good at it.
Haven't been able to get these words out of my head. The fact they are the last thing he says. At first, I was just like "Okay, that's a very Kunikida thing to say" but then I put them into context of what just happened.
He'd been impaled and was desperately trying to use his last moments to allow Tanazaki time to escape. He knew he wasn't living after this, so as per his ideals he was going to fight until his last breath to save another life. If he can die in-service of helping someone else survive, that's enough for Kunikida.
And then he hears Atsushi shout his name. Atsushi ran up from behind Amenogozen, Kunikida probably saw him coming as well. He gripped the sword in his chest with the last of his strength to aid Atsushi in whatever way he could.
And Atsushi chose to save Tanizaki. The very thing he'd been trying to do just seconds before.
That why I think he'd smiling here, that's why I think he says his ideals will live on. Not in some abstract way, but in a direct reference to Atsushi, because he was Atsushi's mentor too. From day one, Atsushi has been seeking guidance from Kunikida, even when he didn't know how to give it.
One of the first pieces of advice Kunikida gives Atsushi is to "start thinking what you can do."
And it has been something he's been trying to figure out ever since. What can he do to help those who need it? To be worthy of living?
Both Atsushi and Kunikida want to save people. Both of them have been struggling on how to achieve that this whole time. Saving people isn't just a single action to Kunikida, it's sacrifice, it's taking on a burden, it's knowing you're tied to this person afterwards.
It's knowing you can't always save everyone no matter how much you want to. It's prioritizing saving who can and living with that.
Kunikida knew he couldn't be saved, but he hoped Tanizaki could. When Atsushi chose to leave him and save Tanizaki he following in Kunikida's footsteps.
His ideals will live on, in Atsushi.
Hello dears! I am asking you to support my campaign to help me reach my goal. I am in dire need of your support now to help me stay alive and safe. Gaza is a very dangerous place both in terms of living and lives. The family consists of 20 members, most of them are young children. I need your financial support to enable me to get the basic needs for my family until the Rafah crossing is reopened to transport my family to safety and peace. Please help a family stay alive through your small donations or through your shares to others. Thank you very much for standing by those in need. My campaign 90-ghoset has been documented
This fundraiser is a vetted one!! So if anyone has money to spare I would highly recommend donating. I wish you best of luck on reaching your goal!!
Thinking about Tachihara deciding to stay with the Mafia after everything's over.
Thinking about the government refusing to give him his next monthly surgery since he's no longer a Hunting Dog.
Thinking about him accepting and coming to terms with the fact that he's going to die, and even saying his goodbyes to his friends in the mafia.
Thinking about Hirotsu, Gin, Higuchi, Kouyou, Chuuya, all refusing to let him die like this, and scrambling to find a way to save him.
Thinking about Chuuya and Kouyou threatening the hospitals to give him the surgeries, and Gin and Higuchi sneaking around to find something that could help.
And then it hits them. The solution, which now seems so obvious in hindsight.
Thinking about Chuuya on the phone with the Detective Agency, and of course it's Dazai who picks up the other end.
Thinking about him sitting in the office, head in his hands, as he hears Chuuya asking him to let Yosano go to the Mafia base for a while.
Thinking about Dazai, out of genuine concern for her, refusing to let her go back to the Port Mafia.
Thinking about Yosano being out the door before Dazai even puts the phone down, because it's Michizō Tachihara. This is Shunzen's younger brother, of course she has to help him.
Thinking about Yosano, when she arrives at the PM base, not having to hurt him even a little bit to use her ability, because he's already that far gone, that broken.
Thinking about her sitting by his side, wondering if when he wakes up he's going to hate her for using the same ability on him that killed his brother.
But when Tachihara wakes up, all he can say to the doctor is "thank you," because he genuinely means it. Because of Yosano's ability, he's healed completely. He has no commitment to the Hunting dogs now.
(If i end this with "he's free" is that cringe?)
Please stop and listen to our painful story and help me save the family 🇵🇸🇵🇸
Help me get my father and mother out and secure their lives
The story of my father and mother who suffered from illness and lived under the wall of a tent
“The tent was their only shelter. Its winter wall was made of threadbare fabric that did not protect them from the cold or summer heat. Inside, they were lying on a thin mattress, two defeated bodies suffering from diabetes and high blood pressure. They woke up every day to the sound of chronic pain and dreams. That relaxes with every breath.
Anything even remotely father shaped in this series must die apparently.
Why is god flirting with Kunikida.