Chaoticnightmarekitty - Vent Rant Blog Yippie

I just saw an ad about "want to kiss your crush? Join the ai trend!"

Thats fucking gross.

Gross as hell

Imagine someone having your photo and making you kiss them.

Lowkey teetering towards deepfake pørn.

For many years of longing, I craved attention from my favorite people. To be loved, to be looked at, to be the only thing in their mind.

I would obsess over them day and night. Where my life was bleak and boring without any interaction with them. I'd get depressed and hopeless without their attention, imagining hurtful scenarios of them leaving, and remembering that these feelings of mine will forever be within me. They will never know. I will not let them know. No matter how much I like them this feeling.

At the same time, I hate it with a passion. I do not like feeling like I have no control. So I do what's best. I ghost everything just because of one person. I leave. But I always come back pathetically yearning for their attention again. Because I can't stand being alone.

You know what's funny though? I met someone... who for the first time reciprocated my feelings without me having to say anything.

I was scared. I was so scared.

I've always been an obsessive person to those I liked. So why... did I hate it the moment they liked me back?

Did i even like them? If not, then does that mean i didn't actually like the previous people before?

Did i simply make up an image of them?

Or is it that I just don't like him? And maybe that's why I didn't like his confession.

I feel gross. I hate that I rejected him and I went back to using him as fuel for my sick fantasies. I hate that I still want his attention.

I hate looking at blogs that have romantic shit that says cheesy things like "what I crave for him to do."

I hate it

I no longer look at men with such rose-tinted glasses anymore. I feel empty. I feel repulsed.

I feel nothing at all.

(Sound on.) We’re all doomed.

I'm so normal w games that let me pretend im loved

How I look scrolling thru the same three apps and rotting in bed all day everyday

Lost another friendship. Feeling superb.

I feel like throwing up.

Why is it so hard to maintain friends? Am I doing something wrong? Im tired..

*me after not showering a week* "Why do I feel so gross?"

I always love it when someone starts off their trauma dump like this. It's so fucking funny.

✨️Wooo humor as a coping mechanism ✨️

Well, actually funny story!

(Proceeds to tell you the most wild, traumatizing, sad and tragic story you ever heard)

Shout out to me for finally figuring out all the parts of my identity