Inspiredtrans - Naamloos

You know that thing with a ball in a jar, where the ball represents grief and the jar represents you? And while the ball doesn't change, the jar gets bigger, representing that grief doesn't get less, it's just that you grow bigger. When I got first introduced to that concept, it seemed ridiculous. But since then... I know that it's true. There's certain things in my life, if I actively think about them, they get me just as mad and worked up as if they happened yesterday. However, they don't occupy my mind 24/7 anymore, like they did when they did happen recently. And I think that's exactly what they mean with the ball in a jar analogy. And I suppose that's better than nothing.

People seriously underestimates how living with mental illness is also inherently traumatizing.

It's been almost 10 years for me now. I physically feel my memory suffering under mental illness. Other senses like vision get affected too.

You wouldn't expect someone to undergo 10 years of cancer treatment, only to still be sick, and tell them "please keep going, you've been so strong before, one day it'll be alright!". You just wouldn't do that, would you?

Then why is it not only normalized, but encouraged to act that way towards me?

"good morning" - wrong because if it were a good morning i wouldnt have woken up

"stop being upset about missing out on a childhood you can live your entire adult life as the gender you want" 1. assuming I'll live "an entire adult life" with this mental state

2. What if I actually want to be an autistic little boy with destructive tendencies but his mom actually still loves him

Once again fell for the trap known as "assuming that someone isn't a homophobic asshole"

My most toxic trait is thinking "there's people far worse than me" is a legitimate excuse. Like it really is in my opinion. But for some reason that seems a way of toxic thinking and now I'm feeling conflicted

its so weird knowing the average person isnt mentally ill. like wdym you aren't disappointed whenever you wake up that cant be true

I'll get lynched, but trans women most definitely have privilege over trans men when it comes to receiving trans-related medical care, and yes that has to do with amab privilege, which is also very real, even if you transition and you're "no longer a man" for lack of better words. There's an inherent privilege to being amab. Obviously being a trans woman doesn't come without downsides, but you also retain some amab privilege, especially in healthcare treatment.