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Im Going To Kms - Blog Posts
hahahahaha im going insane anyways small sketch of kaouri that im working on
i might add kousei later 💔
i love this STUPID idiot dork #i drew this weeks ago and i hate it yay sketch
more Aizawa because hes perfect 💔
I HAD AN IDEA IN MY HEAD TO WRITE A FANFIC/BOOK AND I FORGOT AND I'M ON THE BRINK OF MADNESS BECAUSE I WANT TO REMEMBER BUT I DON'T REMEMBER ?*?#??#?#?$)#!#)#)$(#!#!$("($!#)#?#$))#*(!*)#)#$ 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭
I think the tumblr p*rn bots are trying to do some weird fucked up conversion camp type shit on me like they target the yaoi recommendation tag (I don’t follow that one) wrightworth, narumitsu, klapollo, danganronpa, and more it’s insane I’ve had everything blurred that didn’t change anything
REDRAWWW!!!
redrew my madoka drawing!!!
Random ass oc 🤷🏻♀️
STAY IN THE BOXXXX!!!!
NOOOOOO
STAY IN THE BOXXXX!!!!
NOOOOOO
GET OUT OF MY SKINNNNN
IF YOU’RE NOT HERE TO TURN THE LIGHT OFF, I CANT SLEEP..
GOJO SATORU X READER
➛ summary: you never dreamed of the day you’d lose the love of your life, so what are you supposed to do in this world without him?
➛ warnings: death, mentions of blood, grief, cursing, depression, kind of a happy ending (question mark)
➛ WC: 2.2k
➛A/N: hey guys! So this isn’t a new work, it’s actually my first ‘fic’ I ever posted, I just decided to rework it as I felt it could be better but still loved it. I’m ngl, it’s a super angsty and sad read (my bad). Anyway, happy crying!
6 months earlier…
A blood curdling cry echos the walls around you. A sound you didn’t recognise coming from your own throat, a sound that would later haunt your nightmares.
The cry sounded like something you hear from an animal late at night.
It was the sound of agony. The sound of a world shattering, a connection being severed, a love being ripped from this world.
The sound of a human who just lost everything they ever loved.
You watched Satoru take the hit in slow motion. Your heart beating rapidly in your chest, as if it knew the agony to come.
The moment it connected it felt like you took the hit too. All the air being sucked from your lungs. An intense numbness bleeding into your soul.
Satoru always said it felt like your souls were connected, and in that moment you felt his being ripped from yours.
The rich copper scent filled your nose as you ran towards the man you love. Your legs, that had never felt heavier in your life, moving faster than your brain could keep up with.
Blood. There was so much blood.
“Nononononono.” You whispered as you reached him. “No, Satoru. No.” You cried as you dropped to your knees beside him.
You knew he was gone the moment you reached him. His azure eyes dull and staring blankly at the ceiling.
You pulled his head into your lap, trying desperately to stop the bleeding from his chest.
You pressed blindly as you tried to figure out where the worst wound was. Trying to find a way to apply pressure until help came.
He’s the strongest. The honoured one. No one could bring him down.
That’s what he’d told you hours before. Promised you things would be over in no time. He’d even laughed at your concern as you told him to be careful.
“Please, Toru. Just be careful, for me?” you’d begged as you trailed behind him. “You don’t have faith in me, baby?” He’d asked with a raised brow. “You know no one can take down THE Gojo Satoru.”
His cockiness in his fighting ability was one of the things you secretly loved most about him, despite the fact you’d roll your eyes every time the brag left his mouth.
However, this time you’d had a pit in your stomach the moment you were advised every sorcerer, Grade 2 and up, was to attend this situation.
You knew it was going to be bad. God, you never imagined it would have ended like this though.
Satoru being Satoru had been as unserious as ever, even cracking jokes about how he could deal with it alone without even breaking a sweat.
“P-please, baby. Please j-just stay with me.” You cry, shaky hands still pressed to Satoru’s chest.
“H-HELP! SOMEONE! A-ANYONE! HELP!” You scream. “P-please god, please, help me!” You wail.
Your voice simply echoed around the building.
“Don’t l-leave me, Toru. H-help will c-come. It’s c-coming, I p-promise.” You sniffle as you press your forehead to his. His pale skin already beginning to lose its warmth.
“P-please don’t leave m-me.” Your tears beginning to fall on Satoru’s face. “You p-promised we’d grow o-old together. W-what about our future b-babies, Satoru?” You whisper to him.
“You promised, Toru. You promised!” You sob. “I love you Satoru. P-please just w-wake u-up.” You say, voice barely above a whisper. “Wake up, baby.”
He never did wake up.
Present day…
You stand in the shower. Forehead against the cold tile, in a trance. Numb to daily life.
Being alive without really living was a strange concept.
It felt like you were floating outside of your body everyday. It felt like you were in a small glass box of grief. Suffocating. Withering, like a flower without sunlight.
Watching everyone go about their lives like he’d never even been here. You knew he’d been here though.
His pillow still smelled of him. His clothes still hung in the wardrobe. His socks were still on the bedroom floor.
Everything was still in it’s place like it had been when you both left that day. It all looked the same. Like he could walk through the door, loud and obnoxious as usual, at any moment.
But you knew he wasn’t coming home. Not now. Not ever.
You couldn’t remember the last time you slept more than a few hours.
It was a blessing and a curse.
When you did sleep, you could escape from living life without him here.
However, whenever sleep took you, 9 times out of 10 that day would creep in and you’d relive losing the man you love. Again. And again. And again.
Your hands stained with that deep crimson colour. The lifeless look in his eyes. Your screams echoing around you.
It was unbearable.
The sound of someone knocking on the bathroom door and entering takes you out of your trance.
Turning your head to see Shoko coming in to check on you.
She quickly reaches across you to turn off the shower.
“Jesus, girl. Your back is raw! You didn’t feel the water scalding you?” She looks at you questioningly. “Oh. Uh no, I guess not.” you mumble quietly.
She lets out a soft sigh as she lifts your towel to wrap around you.
She’d been regularly checking in on you since you lost Satoru. Everyone had been. It was overwhelming when all you wanted was to be alone.
Today was one of her weekly visits to bring you groceries. Not that you ate much lately. Despite that, she insisted on cooking for you while she was there so she knew you’d eaten something.
You appreciated her, you really did. But you just wanted to be alone. Nothing anyone could say or do was going to help.
“I made food. So once you’ve changed we can eat together. Maybe watch a movie?” She smiles softly. “Sure. Sounds good.” you attempt a weak smile.
She leaves you to do your thing as she returns to the kitchen.
You stare at yourself in the mirror. It was like all the life had been sucked out of you. The bags under your eyes were dark, your skin looked grey.
In all honesty the life had left you the same day Satoru did.
You slip on one of Satoru’s t-shirts—you basically lived in them recently— some sweatpants and shuffle towards the kitchen.
Shoko hands you your food as you both move to the couch for a movie night.
You pick at the food as the movie plays in the background. Your mind zoning out.
Not a day goes by you don’t replay your memories of Satoru. The love you shared. The kisses. The touches. The late night conversations.
*Flashback*
You were lying in bed. Both of you on your sides, hands propped under your heads.
“You know, I think our babies would be the most beautiful things to ever grace this earth.” Satoru told you as he pushed your hair behind your ear.
“Of course you do, because you think they’ll look just like you.” you snorted. “Nope! Actually, I want them to be a mix of both of us.” he pouted.
“Really?” you blushed. “Of course I do! We’re both super perfect if you hadn’t noticed. Perfection plus perfection can only make more perfection, right?” He said with that signature Satoru grin.
You couldn’t help but roll your eyes as a smile crept onto your face. But, imagining a mini Satoru running around filled your heart with a happiness you couldn’t ignore.
“One day, Toru. One day.” you smiled as you leaned in for a kiss.
*End of flashback*
Except, ‘one day’ would never come.
You’d never get the chance to carry his baby. Never get the chance to have a mini Satoru running around at your feet.
“Y/n? Y/N!” Shoko pulls you out of your memories. “Huh?” You blink, realising your mind had run away with you.
“Sweetie, are you ok? Y-you’re uh you’re crying.” she says softly.
You touch your face, finding it wet. When did that happen?
“Y-yeah. Yeah, I’m ok. I think I need to go lay down though.” you reply. “Sure. I’ll take off and let you rest then. You sure everything’s ok?” She asks quietly as places her hand on yours. “Mhm. I think I just need some more rest.” You tell her, forcing a smile.
You know she knows you’re lying. But, she also knows nothing in that moment she could say or do would help.
She nods at you softly before she begins collecting her things.
“I left some meals in the refrigerator for you, so please try and eat at least one of them.” Shoko looks at you pleadingly. “Ok.” You say quietly.
The moment Shoko shuts the door, the tears start again.
How were you supposed to do this? To live a life without Satoru? To ever find happiness and joy in life again?
You just didn’t know if that was possible.
December 7th, 2084.
Your bones ache as you prepare for bed.
You spit into the sink before putting your toothbrush back in the holder. You let out a sigh as you take in your appearance.
Your skin is old and wrinkled now. Deep creases line your forehead and between your brows.
You make your way to your bed, kissing your finger tips and pressing it to the photo of Satoru on your bedside table before you slip into bed.
Today would’ve been his birthday.
You never did get over losing him. Even after all these years, there wasn’t a day that went by where your heart didn’t yearn for him.
After a year, you’d gone back to being a sorcerer.
Honestly, you’d began to take the most stupid risks on jobs. Not longer caring what happened to you.
Eventually, Shoko intervened. After the 10th time you’d ended up being sent to her after a mission, she’d reached her boiling point.
She knew how capable you were, you were a special grade sorcerer after all. So the frequent trips to her to get stitched up were becoming increasingly concerning.
She’d told you to make a choice. Either leave the sorcerer world or stop being a dumbass before you got yourself killed.
Seeing her so upset over the possibility of losing you too was the only reason you fixed up your behaviour. Because, the reality was you wouldn’t have cared if a curse killed you. At least you’d get to be with Satoru again.
Unfortunately, life was like a cruel twist of fate in your eyes and you’d lived a long life, despite your lack of care at work.
Now in your mid 80s, you’d long left that world behind. Deciding to move to a quiet area and into a small home.
You never did marry. Or have children.
No man could ever replace Satoru. And the idea of children running around who didn’t have his snowy white hair, his bright azure eyes or his cheeky smile—was of no interest to you.
You’d watched your friends get married, have kids, etc, and you were happy for them, truly you were, but you knew you didn’t want any of that.
Not if it wasn’t with him.
You’d learned to smile again, although it never did travel to your eyes the same way. You learned to laugh again, but it was always a little broken. You learned how to live again, but were secretly counting down the days until you reunited with your love.
You didn’t lead a miserable life, not by any means, but you couldn’t say it was ever truly a happy one again either.
As you settle down to sleep, your memories flow through your mind of the last 60 years, and you imagine how it would have been if you’d never lost Satoru.
You’d have married. Probably in an obnoxiously over the top wedding thanks to Satoru.
You’d have had 3, no, maybe 4 children.
3 boys, who were a perfect mix of you both. And then a girl, oh how she would have been a mini version of her daddy.
You’d probably be a wrinkly old couple who doted on their grandchildren by now.
You’d have been happy, truly happy. Alas, it never came to be.
It was sad you’d lived a life where the only true joy you found was in imagining what could have been.
You close your eyes and start drifting of too sleep. A picture of Satoru’s face in your minds eye. One day you’d be together again.
One day.
You suddenly jolt awake.
You look around to find yourself in your old apartment.
You sit up and your bones no longer ache at the movement like they usually did. Confused, you move towards the bathroom to look in the mirror. You almost let out a scream at what you see.
You’re 24 again.
Skin bright and glowing. No bags under your eyes, no wrinkles, no sagging skin.
You touch your face slowly, pulling and pushing at the skin in question before the sound of someone humming and singing catches your attention.
You move slowly in the direction of the sound.
The smell of someone cooking begins to waft through the hallway as you follow the sound of the voice you can hear humming.
A man stands shirtless with his back to you, cooking at the stove. Swaying side to side as he hums to himself.
Except that wasn’t just any man. The pale skin, the snowy white hair, the muscular but lanky arms. Hold on, that’s—
“Hello, my love. I’ve been waiting for you.”
on a scale of 1-cooked, how far past the point of no return are you when the very thought of a fictional character makes you jump into bed and roll around and giggle like a middle schooler who just got a text from their crush
Maybe discontinued fics written by orphan accounts make this life no longer worth living
I think a lot of jirai/menhera committed suicide on January 1st :(
guys i LOVEEEE PJO, but. if I see ONE MORE FIC of Annabeth & Percy calling each other “Wise Girl” & “Seaweed Brain” throughout the entire fic i’m going to commit myself to a mental hospital. PLEASE. THEY HAVE NAMES. USE THEM.
THIS IS A LIFE-OR-DEATH SITUATION! THEY DONT NEED CUTESY NICKNAMES ON THE FIELD.
Idk if it’s a flex or not but I physically CANNOT cry in the shower 😋
The way I gasped has no name
What if Team Leader Lee Soo Hyuk also had a 0% mortality rate. And that's why, when Kim Roksoo saw his teammates continue to survive despite the dangers, and continue to persistently try get him to open up to them. He thought that maybe these people will not leave. They won't die, and they won't turn away from him. So he thought it was okay to open up, it's ok to allow himself to cherish these people.
And the moment he made up his mind about it, the whole team was wiped out.
finally watched alien stage. um.. let's just say I need to stop getting so emotionally attached to fictional characters in a literally DEATH GAME. So yeah. 😀
Vent
oh yeah, today's been great, definitely didn't relapse. definitely didn't nearly have a panic attack because I thought blood was dripping down my arm in lesson. definitely didn't keep walking into the guy who made s*x jokes about me for half a year last year. definitely not getting angry and overwhelmed by everything and getting yelled at by my parnsst to sort my attitude out.
me looking round the classroom, hoping no one saw me flinch when the teacher started shouting
I firmly believe that, originally, Liu Kang had expected that the champion would be Kenshi. Now, don’t get him wrong. Any champion would be fine by him, he trusts them all and loves them all. And it would’ve made sense that Kenshi would be the one to win, as he was the one with the most experience out of the four champions.
But when Kenshi was defeated, it took him by surprise that this man, Kenshi, who escaped the yakuza. Who was more skilled in fighting terms, that had more experience, had lost.
That put Liu Kang slightly on edge. Because it meant that his champion would be either Johnny, Raiden or Kung Lao. When Johnny lost, his nerves weren’t appealed. But when Kung Lao lost, it felt like he could breath again.
His brain making him remember when his friend had died on his timeline. He trusts Kung Lao, he trusts him as a person and he trusts his strength. But he’s still grateful that it wouldn’t be Kung Lao the one to face Shao Ka—General Shao.
Even if this new tournament, that he himself organized, didn’t required for anyone to die, like in his timeline, Liu Kang—despite all the eons that had passed— still had it fresh in his skull when his friend died. The celebrations that the public had made when Kung Lao’s inert, cold, dead body hit the arena. The way his eyes were wide open, staring at nothing, and how the bone of the neck was slightly peeking out through the skin.
Liu Kang doesn’t think he will ever forget any of it.
Why don't you sit right down and
Stay a while
We like the same things
And I like your style
⋆ ˚｡⋆୨୧˚ patrochilles ˚୨୧⋆｡˚ ⋆
✧ all the stars - kendrick&sza ✧
"I thought of how many nights I had lain awake in this room, loving him in silence."
all the stars are closer i.e. achilles sleeping beside patroclus as the latter lay awake, yearning.
"We were like gods at the dawning of the world, and our joy was so bright we could see nothing else but the other."
the youthful notion that nothing would happen to them, when in fact they were running out of time. the way they were obsessed with each other.
"....they never let you be happy and famous."
corrupt a man's heart with a gift i.e. achilles having enough strength to succumb to pride.
"If you have to go, you know I will go with you."
the fact that both achilles and patroclus didn't care about winning or losing at the end — they simply wanted each other.
"I wish he had let you all die."
"There are no bargains between lions and men. I will kill you and eat you raw."
the way achilles was always uncaring of others, their views, their attitudes, and aware of their lies, their schemes, but the only thing that mattered to him was patroclus.
"I would recognize you in total darkness, were you mute and I deaf. I would recognize you in another lifetime entirely, in different bodies, in different times. And I would love you in all of this, until the very last star in the sky burnt out into oblivion."
"I could recognize him by touch alone, by smell; I would know him blind, by the way his breaths came and his feet struck the earth. I would know him in death, at the end of the world.”
"I am made of memories."
"Go," she says. "He waits for you."
In the darkness, two shadows, reaching through the hopeless, heavy dusk. Their hands meet, and light spills in a flood like a hundred golden urns pouring out of the sun.
enough said.
Bran VI, AGOT
Bran might never have warmed to Theon, but he is the only Stark to include him in their prayers 🙏
Kanan deserved to be able to raise his son.
I’m writing a book, but i have a shit ton of lore that i’ll never be able to incorporate into it 🥹
my boyfriend keeps on talking about how much he wants another girl
why can't I be the type of girl that forgets to eat when stressed instead of eating too much
also which picture is better
I want to die
hey guys im sorry i haven’t updated, i literally got evicted from my house and had to sleep on my car on a supermarket parking lot with my family yesterday, i still don’t have internet at my new house so idk when ill be able to upload again, love yall
im a bad person
i only hurt those around me
everyones lives would be better if i was dead
i only ruin things
i shouldve died a long time ago
i shouldve never made it this far
im not going to get further in life anyways
im going to die before im 20
either from su1cide or from my illness
i hope i die soon
everyone would be better off that way
(sooner or later im gonna sl1t my throat or ove3d0se on my meds or h4ng myself from a tree in my backyard)
if god doesnt to it, im taking matters into my own hands istfg
i hope this is my last year
fr, yall will never understand how disappointed i am of myself rn, bcz i was actually getting kinda better n now im thinking abt the fastest n easiest ways to commit again
The moment you actually start thinking about suicide again after being okay is so painful